h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Checks yuletide watch* Bit early for Slade, isn't it?

I mean, with the open fire and the chai and everything . . .



I've been around the world in a plane
Designed the latest IBM brain
But lately
I'm so downhearted
'Cos I can't get started
With you

Camomile tea? Sure thing ma'am!

There you are!

Trin... I'm not a christmas person as such... it takes me forever to get into the mood, so thought I'd start now...

"Christmas time, don't let the bells end.."

please?

Right away!




Ooh, it's so nice to see the place fill up again!

excuse me, can you tell me if there any pikelets left with some butter

I'll have a look in the kitchens, sir...

most kind, my lady, I'll put the kettle on while you look

With an open fire and all, can't we toast pikelets in here?

(That's pikelets as in horizontally-challenged crumpets, yes? Not little pikes? Because I'm not sure that's legal. Not off-season, anyway)

cant call em crumpets, they are pikelets, I will ask an attendant for a long fork for the fire

Found some - there we are!

*Produces a large plate of fresh warm pikelets, accompanied by generous amounts of butter, jam and cream*

Toasting them - that's a grand idea! I'll go get some long forks. *disappears back into the kitchen*

back in a mo' going to get some chestnuts as well, can someone make the hot toddies

Ooooh food as well, can't be bad..

Just you watch your chestnuts on that open fire...

That's alright ma'am - we'll put them on a metal tray.

My, this really is nice, isn't it?

Ye old village choir singing festive carols outside

old, with an E that is

That's ok then..

It is nice and cosy isn't it... Time for another plz to keep out the winter ills....

cockatiel int giong to like me, I'm nipping down for a swig, back in a trice

There y'are ma'am!

*Pours herself some more *

"Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...
Jack Frost nipping at your nose...."