h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*offers gold to Afgncaap5*

Here, that should be enough to pay for the satelite.

*maniacal laughter*
*hysterical laughter*
*maniacal laughter*
*caugh*

if they havent got their sattelite they cant get sky!

now i feel bad

...But in that sleep of Mad, what dreams may come?
When we have shuffled off our sanity
Must give us pause. There's the respect
That makes insanity of this whole thread.

I'm not reading 45 posts, somebody tell me what's going on.

A war has broke, a battle of the wits;
We try to make them nuts and go away.
They keep complaining to us about rules,
About not keeping continuity.
We do our best to fight their iron ships
With our fruit guns and rubber ducks and such;
But at the moment they are not online.

But who's attacking us?

It's STUMPED, and I think also CLI.
They're all over this place with their long posts.
We need to make them go away at once!

Who are CLI?

And why does my tearoom have so many posts?

I don't know who they are or what they do.
They did explain, but it was boring, so
I didn't really notice their long post.
The tearoom is a different matter, though;
If you go in, you'll find some changes there.

What sort of changes?!

*shrugs*

Men! Take aim!

*the armies of eunuchs and car salesmen aim at Yael*

Tell me now.

We are at war, and you take aim at me?!
I am insulted, not to say appalled.

Youe tearoom's fine, don't worry, it has just
Aquired some new features... so to say.

What sort of new features?

Complaining? Nah, I was just explaining why the actions went the way they did. Ya gotta keep it loose, guys.


*Affy looks at the pot of Leprechaun's Gold and grins*

You know, I can use this stuff! Just the other day I had designed a new computer chip that needed to use synthesized Leprechaun's Gold to work properly! Let's see, I'll need to use one of the anti-catylists to prolong this gold's half-life so that it'll survive,....Ah! Formula 732! That's exactly what I'll use, this gold'll last longer than normal gold with that stuff!

*So saying, Affy aims his wristwatch at the pot of gold, taps a few buttons, and a beam of energy envelops the pot of gold. The pot vanishes, going to the CLI Treasure Room*

Well, I believe that this pays for the satelite quite nicely.


Chesworth! They've paid for what they did. They even covered the expenses for launching the new satelite into orbit! I know, it's just great. Anyway, send all the troops home, and aim the Snowball Cannon away from here. Thanks!


*Roughly a dozen heavily armored CLI Securibots decloak, lower their weapons, and march home*

Now then, I think that my business is done here. Good luck with your war, although I place my bets on STUMPED. OH! And did you also want to be put on the list? That's a slightly more reasonable fee, if you're willing to pay.

*sigh*
And here they go again, with these long posts
As if there's nothing better we can do...
Oh wait, there isn't. Never mind then, lads.

*Blinks at Yael*

I take it from your prose that you're not too keen on being put on the anti-spy satelite list. Well then, I'll be off, I suppose. If you change your mind and want to pay the fee so that the satelites won't look at your rooftops, then you can catch me at CLI.

*Tosses a business card to Yael*


Crater Labs, Incorporated
Managed by Afgncaap5 and Garius Lupus

CLI-Where Explosions Build Character!
Making mad sience happy since 1999.
A258167


*Affy walks home, whistling to himself*

B*st*rds with your long posts!

*Fires his tomato machine-gun at the ships in orbit.*



*One tomato hits the exaust port of one the ships. The ship, and all the troops on board, carsh into the planet*

Oh-uh.