h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

which I've already done, but then, I'm on frink's drinks, so you knew that!

ah well, Irv
- I had a café going but it wasn't quite as nice as this one here is so I give up to the competition without the slightes regrets and better stick to the kitchen.
I'd love to cook/bake for this place too (have to get some magic connection for all the kitchens I spread round here ) - or if you already have a Chef du Cafe, I had enough training in serving lots of c(~) - and worked in a bookstore, too, so chuck me in where you need me .
if you do.
if not I'll play Contented Customer. which reminds me... is there any coffee to be had here? cinnamon flavoured cappucchino e.g.?

*winks*
k*

I don't know - I only wash up and no-one's dirtied any yet

And now we have saucepans to wash up:

\__/==

One cinnamon flavoured cappucchino coming up! will that be a single or a double? skim, 2% or whole? And I could always use a good baker! Or two! Or more! At my old place (in the real world) we used to call them food gods and godesses.

Hurry up and drink it so I can it wash up!
At least now we've plates and bowls to clean, too:
\===/ .__. \__/ (Courtesy of Mad Hatter)

Morning everybody!
*sniff* Hmm... not meaning to be critical, that milk smells a little off. Can I be your resident milkman, providing cold fresh daily milk? Not by myself, of course, I will use cows.
Here's a free complementary bottle of milk: ((()=

Sure thing, fresh milk is very important. As is fresh cream -- will you be providing us with all dairy products? Or just milk?

c(~)
*drinks* -> c(_) wonderful! -
and a perpetual refill, otherwise I may forget these here cookies in the oven *presents cinnamon cookies and chocolate muffins*.
may I give this dirty c(_) to you, and the --o, too, Bluebottle?

Oh cream of course, too. I can provide full cream, whipped cream, whole cream milk, semi-skimmed, fully-skimmed, and pretty much any other dairy product that has been tortured in some way. Butter, of course, for kats-eye's scones...
mmmmmm I'm hungry.

great idea, scones.... *runs to the kitchen*
*reemerges with a tray of scones*
and who has got the strawberry jam??

I'll have to do without until the next delivery.
Mmmm, tasty scones. Thanks.
*Leans back in comfy red armchair and sighs contentedly*
This is very relaxing. It's a shame I have to pay 1p a minute to be here though...

I would like to apply for the position of "Toaster from Tibet" please. This is because I feel I have the right qualifications to make a very good toaster. My parents were both toasters, and taught me the craft from a very early age. I can make lightly burnt toast, mediumly burnt toast, and charcoal.

And I have home-made blackcurrant jam to go with it.

Toaster from Tibet it is...

Hello, I would like to be the waitress, as I noticed you have noone lifting the dirty cups from the tables wearing a short skirt and attractive little apron, and complete with bulging cleavage, I feel i am extremely suited to the job, and also have been known to wander around stage cafes ( The last play I was in "Og Innimellom") spouting poetry, or singing ( Cabaret) Please say yes
Hxx

great, Amoeba, those are coming just right for the scones! Thank u!

*peeks into Helenas decolleté*retracts to kitchen and starts searching for some nice melons to imitate it*



nah, just joking, won't play with food

Wow! I'm not going to say no to that! And as our stage has been rather empty lately... it's going to be one big YES!

Toast is ready now, everybody... which by a bizarre set of circumstances means that we need more milk, Peregrin... and Helena, if I could just have a hand serving it, that would be most handy...

So nice to see everyone working as a team!

Here I am.
*Removes bottle of milk from the fridge. Empties it into a small milk churn. Starts churning. Half a day later, he drains off the whey, and scoops the curd off. Mixes a little salt in. Fashions into a nice round pat. Stamps top with cute picture of a cow. Presents butter to kats-eyes to spread on the toast.*

Ta-da!!!

Okay that was a little unnecessary, but I've got to keep myself occupied.
*Discreetly hides the packet of butter that was in the fridge anyway*