h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Burns a few infidels*
Well... it's okay, it just doesn't come with the bi-directional telescopic sights that the VVH 3000 series has...

*Pats BB's arm.* Christmas is just around the corner, dear.

Yay! Christmas!
I love seeing a nice warm loghouse on fire...

(Gazing up at elephant) Well, this one looks fairly friendly. Can anyone lend me a ladder or give me a leg-up?

(After an altogether too long absence, the Good Dr. returns)
Have you tried telling your elephant to kneel? I've found that that usually works.

Dr. D

OK. I've taken a quick look underneath and found that he's a bull elephant. so I need a boy's name for him.
Hmm... grey, slow, wrinkled, sombre-looking... I think I'll name him Kevin, in tribute to Kevin Keegan.
Er... (raises voice, nervously) KEVIN! KNEEL!

See this herd of elephants is very inteligent. BB As soon as we are safely out of the woods and away from inflamable buildings I habe a present for you.

-Archbishop Marv

(Clambers nervously on to Kevin's back. Hangs on grimly.)
Er... Kevin! Stand!

Ormy, when we get to the next town, you might have a platform installed on Kevin. It is easier to have your beer on the more stable platforms.

I'll remember that. And I'm glad to know that you're thinking of the most vital things a traveller needs.

I have been on this journy long enough. That is why I walk however. I do not like to spill my drink.

*aranges her new purchases on Jenny's back, taking special care that her side table is stable - for liquid refreshment*

Well, I'm sorry that we didn't find the flamethrower of your dreams, BB. We'll just have to continue looking.

G7

*Places her foot into a crook in Emma's trunk. Emma lifts her into place on her back. She arranges her folding lounge chair, mixes a nice large vt, and settles back with her new pith helmet on her head.*

(happy to be trekking again!)

*rides up on the bar platform between Thirsty and Thirstier*

So what do you think of the new decorating job

(about time we headed off again too IMHO)

(IMHO???)

~happy~ I'm glad you're back Dr. Z! Toward Italy then? Are we still going to have to cross the Alps? We got bogged down there last time.

*In My Honest Opinion*

I didn't realise Zeds family castle was anywhere near the Alps

I hope we don't go too far from inflammable buildings, Marv...

What say we try to go south a bit, through france and spain perhaps? It is getting a little chilly here.

Yes, we should take the word of the Brownie to France. It is a heathen land, where false idols such as gateaux and choux pastries are worshipped.

Then we *must* go to France. Its a moral imperative!

*motions to Jenny that they should get started*

G7