h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I know it's terrible. Show a plonker a juicy looking peach and it just gets stuck right in there. A radical splitter group calling itself F5 or Freedom For Fruit From Fear recently tried to ram a cargo vessel coming to that sailed *directly* to the UK from a top secret port in Kashmir bringing more bats to Britain. Unfortunately their rubber dingy just bounced off the side.

Which was when they decided to sit down and have a good think about their effectiveness over a nice warm marijuana.

The marijuana havest! Oh it is the holocaust! [to paraphrase Brother Maynard]

The dooms day clock says 10 minutes to midnight.

Of under EU regulations the Doom's Day Clock had to built to use metric time! Pah!

^course

Did you know that weed, wacky baccy, product, stuff or ganja grows wild in the Caribbean, old ladies make tea with it for medicinal purposes you understand. Old ladies smokes it in a pipe and it is given to children to ease asthma and to calm them.

Just yesterday, i went to dictionary.com, and 'gullible' wasn't in there.

You won't find 'it' at Bartleby.com

Can't is not a word.

The definition of gullible according to the dictionary is: fleeceable: naive and easily deceived or tricked;

Definition of meaning: fleeceable = happy to take your kit off
naive = Watches and believes day time tv
deceived = Watches and believes day time tv
tricked = anyone watching big brother

Pedant alert:

"Fleecable" is the ability to put a fleece on someone or something.

The correct term in the above example is "De-fleecable" - the ability to take a fleece (or kit) off someone.

Saying Kit as clothing is not PC as it harkens back to the day when people wore Kitten fur as clothing.

Isn't that why people ensured they were slim in those days? Cos other wise we would have no cats =^-^=

It takes 54 moles to make the average pair of moleskin trousers.

Welsh keyboards have two extra "L"'s.

And the V is replaced by an 'f' and the where the 'f' would normally be there's 'dd'. I forget where the 'ch' is...

Not sure how many babies it takes to make one bottle of baby oil.

Did you know that eating sage makes your brain work?

To Work in the Thought Mines!
SAGE IS A GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY TO FORCE US ALL INTO SLAVERY!!! dON'T EVER EAT IT, OR ELSE...

The CapsLock button slows down your processor by 5%