h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Some chicken would be nice, still flapping would be preferable

why don't you eat the Phoenix

then who would prepare it?

*bangs on the table*

MILK!!

Actually if I expect her to put up with this I should probably promote her farther...

why? what did her dad do?

sorry, sorry, couldn't resist

*proceeds to arrest himself for bad humour*

*sits the now handcuffed creachy in a chair at the bar, and offers him some beer through a straw*

is it farther or further? Can't you say both?

i was more playing on the pun of the pronunciation of farther and father. further is the american adaption i think but it is widely used now instead of farther, but they both mean the same thing as far as i am aware.

*gulps through straw*

Ok then.

*goes in the fridge and helps herself to some milk*

Um... does the surgeon use the same fridge.

It's just that there appears to be a few blood packs in here....

*sprays his drink everywhere*

it's not australian is it? i hate aussi beer!

um...

*finds the bottle she got it out of and puts it on the table in front of him*

Dunno...

*helps herself to a milk, moving a couple of vital organs out of the way*

ah, no it's alright. comes from somewhere called Urine. sounds Chezch to me

Yeah... I think it's somewhere in the south...

*checks that the milk genuinely is milk*

Um...

*puts it back carefully and has some orange juice*

Oh you found them then, I think Dr MO was looking for them earlier

don't blame him, this is good stuff.

*finishes off his *

want a top up?

And would you like me to get those handcuffs off you? Where's the key?

*burp*

Sorry I eat it

You ate the key?

Oh dear.

Only one option then.

The chainsaw. Don't worry Ralph. It's a new model - V12 engine, hard to manouever, diamond tipped. It should cut through those chains easily.

*Curls up to watch the carnage.........oops sorry I meant the fun *

All right Bob.

Anyone got any diesel fuel?

erm, no.

i have a spare

*reaches into pocket and pulls out bundle of keys*

now if i can just remember which one it is

*looks disapointed*

But I can't claim the money back for the chainsaw if I don't use it.