h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: How to cook lobster - A1055521
Author: Researcher 228433 - U228433

How to cook lobster



A lobster is a small shelled crustcean resembling a giant ugly bug with huge pincers. It is native to New England and is a delicacy in other parts of the country. If you insist on taking the matter of cooking it rather than letting some other sucker willing to risk a body part, here are some good rules to follow.

1. The claws have been fitted with a giant rubber band, under no circumstances are you to remove this! Unless of course you think that you wouldn't mind losing a body part.

2. Do not attempt to play, cuddle, or throw the lobster around you are already going to boil the thing to death there is no need to torture it anymore than necesarry.

3. There are only two ways to cook lobster you can boil it or steam it. If you wish to boil it, put a small bit of water at the bottom make sure the lobster and water don't touch. Turn on the heat and wait about 10 minutes or until the lobsters are red. If you choose to boil it, add water the n put lobster cook until lobsters ae red. Add a beer towards the end of the cooking process, it makes it taste better.

4. When eating, the tail and claws are really the only pieces worth tying to crack.

5. Have some nutcrackers on hand it is the only way to get to the meat inside the shell.

6. Perhaps most important, the shell is inedible, the meat is inside the shell.

Finally if you have completed all the steps without hurting yourself too badly, enjoy your meal!

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The entry is a good start for an entry on how to cook a lobster, but Gosho's right. It needs a bit of work before it can be considered for inclusion.

It may be a little too humourous, but there's definitely an entry in here somewhere.

Lobster are eaten in other parts of the world than just the USA.

If you're boiling lobsters, does the water have to be salt water? I seem to recall hearing something to this effect.

Not only is it eaten outside of the USA it's also native to lots of places other than New England

Pongo

S'right!

You might also like to check out A496343 - How to Eat Lobster - which is already in the Edited Guide. This still means there's plenty of room for your entry in the EG, but probably means you'll be best advised to take out the parts of your entry about eating lobster and link to that Entry instead.

And a quick query as well - when you're talking about boiling or steaming, I think you start the part about steaming by saying 'if you wish to boil...' - did you mean to?

Cheers,
Number Six

Salt and lots of it was always in the recipe I used for cooking lobster - not that I cook it that often mind.

Salt, in all dishes, is used as a flavour enhancer. The sodium ions activate and enhance the taste receptors on your tongue - effectively using a charge to increase the contact surface area. Monosodium glatamate works on the same principle.

Good lobster has a delicate flavour and, cooked unsalted, is really rather tasteless. Hence, it is traditionally cooked in sea water, where the additional dissolved potassium doubles the effect (potassium salts are far superior to sodium ones, by the way - they are used in low-sodium table salt).

B

One suggestion for improvement would be to try and avoid opinion, such as "the head and the tail" are the only parts with edible meat. Don't ask me why, but there are those who consider the "greens stuff" inside to be delectible. (but then, some people like haggis)
Do a little research on other areas where lobsters are found; Florida, for example.
Perhaps (just perhaps) you could expand it to include more crustaceons. And, perhaps, suggest a more humane way to kill them than cooking them to death. I can assure you that the taste and texture are the same, and no one has to listen to the poor things scream. (and they do scream)

Do they heckers like! The 'screaming' is simply air trapped beneath the shell escaping under high pressure. Like a kettle boiling, that's all.

B

Are you still working on this, marvinthexplorer?

In your first line, you misspelled crustacean. Just a thought.
-The Professor

The author is very close to having left the building, perhaps time to think about moving this entry?

I'd second that if I was a Scout, but I'm not - just someone who knows a lot about lobster.

B

You're in luck. There's nothing to second. Cyzaki isn't a scout either

Hmmm...d'you think it might be a good idea to find someone who is?

B

Well we can't move it until the 18th

So Jodan, do you support the idea of moving this entry to the Flea Market as of the 18th?

Well, I do, if that counts for anything...

I'll third/fourth/fifth/second it come the 18th

spelugx -- <./>scout</.>

Splendid. Any more for any more?

Aragoste! Aragoste! Aragoste Bellissimi !