h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Go on... we're alone... you can tell me...

They'll get me if I tell you.....I think they're watching me now...

YOU are be watched by THEM... Oh gosh... can I help???

A really good disguise could help..... oh, and councelling (do you know a good councellor?) also a fake passport and a few million quid should do the trick!!! I promise to leave you a contact address...

Have you tried a green wig and an anarok??? I find that ppl tend to stare clear of me when I am wearing my anonymous disguise, also it helps if you have on a pair of red wellies... this is not compulsary though...

I know a good councellor, unfortuanately after seeing me for a few sessions, she herself is now undergoing councilling... strange world is it not???

A fake passprt I can't help you with... but if I do happen to win the lottery any time soon, call on me and I will give you a couple of squillion quids to help you start a new life where THEY can't find you....

Oooh! Ta muchly! Red wellies? Wouldn't they be slightly conspicuous?

My councellor told me that there wasn't much wrong with me and discharged me. I've come to the conclusion that it's not me that mad, it is in fact everyone else! (So there!) Mind you, my long suffering hubby and the kids think otherwise!

p.s. I don't "do" the lottery as I'm completely anti-Camelot, the money-grabbing b******* who run it although my better half does go in for the odd flutter, much against my wishes and says he won't share any winnings with me if I feel that strongly about it!!! (Bah! Humbug!)

To be honest... I think that if there ever is a THEY in this world then its those that run Camelot!!!...

This is turning into a real conspiracy theory thing. This time next week we'll all be living in bunkers in the Arizona desert, stockpiling weapons and chewing tobacco.

What is the basis for that opinion, Oh Heaving One?

I could hack this living in the desert thing as it is cold, wet and windy here in the north of the U.K. at present. I'm not sure about the weapons or chewing tobacco though.

"They" say it is going to get cold tomorrow and it may snow on high ground (brrr).

Aha... so you listne to THEY... and believe THEM?

More fool me - and "they're" usually wrong!!!

~cheshire grin~... then stop listening to THEM!!!

That's rather difficult as they keep announcing things on the radio at frequent intervals... (I'm addicted to BBC Radio 4 as well as H2G2).

Well listen to Greebo then...

Greebo Quote No:406 "Believe not what you hear but what you see!"

Thanks Greebo! I must remember to clean my glasses more often... but what about the weather forecasts on television?? There was this famous one in 1986/87 by Michael Fish, I think (you should remember this if your British) where said weather forecaster in reply to a lady who had asked if a hurricane was on the way as she had heard from another source, replied that there would be no hurricane or high winds. That night, the whole country was lashed by a hurricane and everything was disrupted, people killed/injured plus lots of lovely old trees lost. Poor old Michael Fish has never lived it down!

Indeed, we lost a lot of lovely old oak trees from the north side of our house which had up till that point kept off the northern winds. If you ask me They probably caused the Hurricane in the first place just so we would freeze. Still, said trees completely blocked the road in both directions so I couldn't get to school that day which, when your headmistress was as evil as mine, was most definitely a good thing for the 7 year old I was. I think She might have been one of Them.

Yes me remembers that day well... well... ~grin~... not well... but me remembers it... and I do have to agree that teachers, especially head teachers are definately THEY... or THEM...

My village got off completely untouched. I think one of THEM may be residing close to me. Help!


Argh! Lock the doors! Nail large crooked peices of wood against all the windows! Ah! AH! AHH!