h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This was one of the most enjoyable dreams I've had. I dreamed that I visited Martha's Vineyard (an island off the south coast of Massachusetts) because I had heard that Harry Potter was there, busily writing the sixth volume of his memoirs.

Eventually I found him on the second floor of a modest little house built in the Cape Cod style. He was a young man in his early twenties, very similar in appearance to what Daniel Radcliffe will look like when he grows up. He was trying hard to finish his book, but it was not easy to come up with a decent ending. He swore me to secrecy about the fact that (a.) he was a real person, and (b.) J.K. Rowling was just a front who had agreed to pretend to be the author so Harry could work in peace without being hounded by the media.

I didn't ask Harry if his books were autobiographical. It didn't matter anyway. After chatting with him for a while, I slipped downstairs to a little cafe so I could try their seafood sandwiches and chowder.

You didn't ask Harry to join you? I should think he'd be a good friend to make!

Seafood sandwiches?

Gaahhhh!

Couldn't you have tried something that wasn't so "fishy"???

How about a nice peanut butter and jelly sandwhich Paul? Or Turkey with lettuce, tomoto and honey dijon mustard? I have made Harry cast a petrification spell on you and then levitate you to the nearest shop!

It was *just* a dream!

In real life, I would have brought some food up to Harry on a silver platter, and knelt by his desk while he ate.

that's slightly scary


()

More than slightly ...

Harry could have just raised his wand and said, "Accio cheeseburger, Pepsi,Pepsi, chip, chip" and they would have levitated up from the kitchen along with John Bellushi.

Why would Harry Potter want to eat John Bellushi?

Yes Paul why???

That was a Saturday Night Live reference.

There was a skit in which John Bellushi and others were Greek or Slavic workers in a New York diner. As diners would order food, they would shout orders to the short-order cook or waiters: "Pepsi!Pepsi!Chip!Chip! Chizzbourgah" It was really, really funny.

John Bellushi would help serve the food, not become part of it.

Just as long as no one starts a food fight.

I had a really good dream the toher night that has inspired my second novel.

Bravo, Mr. Christopher!!! I love it when that sort of thing happens!!! Actually, that happened to me...

... Dreaming of Harry Potter... Nice... But I think Hermoine's the real author if J.K. Rawling's not.

As I write it, I wonder if I could make it a serial for h2g2 or the local lit mag. Some elements may not be suitable for Children, young adults, the elderly, Russians, or accountants.

I have noticed that a lot of children and young adults want things that are not *suitable* for them.

I think it's an interesting plot: it's about the secret lives of boring people: accountant, manager, student/tile layer, draftsman, business woman; and the really boring life of a male prostitute.

Throw in a bearded lady, a frog who does math sums while twirling a hula hoop, and the Borg on laughing gas, and I'll be glad to read it.

Well, there is sexual perversion, unclaimed children, freakish weather, helicopters, and large ships caught in the ice of a frozen harbor.