h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

...so...Bite ME!

Okay... Which has more meat, your arms or your legs?

Take a guess......
*jams her foot into Wargamer's mouth...*Now SHHHHHHHH! I'm going to take a nap*...falls asleep in a yoga position with her foot in Wargamer's mouth...*

*Begins revving up a Chainsaw*
[hehehe... let's remove that foot, shall we...]

...*takes an aligator egg out of a pouch & smacks Wargamer in the middle of his forehead...*

Don't just stand there with egg on your face!

*Grabs Pandora and shoves her down a flight of stairs*
Have a nice trip! See you next fall!

Ooooo...that, Mister was a BIG mistake...
THIS is gonna' be fun. You know Wargamer...I said to myself, "Self, n\the VERY next fellow who comes around to with you...you REALLY ought to teach him what a Born Again Tart can do.
Since we are both patriots...I shall give you ONE last chance to concede. Otherwise...be prepared to suffer the... well, you'll just have to find out the hard way...or are you HALF as smart as I FIRST thought you were?

I'll wait.
Think it over well...

...I suggest you think with your brain & leave the testosterone out of this...just a suggestion.

Okay, here's the problem:
1) You must be American, as NO-ONE in England ever calls themselves 'patriotic'.
2) English people aren't patriotic, we just get the Scots to batter everyone (never, EVER mess with a man in a kilt, you won't come out of it alive!).
3) I'm English.
4) USA isn't old enough yet to know that patriotism changes, whereas racial animosity lasts forever (Hey, France! Remember Agincourt? )
5) I hate mosquitos. Therefor, I can never truly enjoy America because I always get bitten ! Get rid of the mosquitos and then I'll be happy!
6) Americans call Football Soccer, and changed Rugby into a softer game that they call Football. Why did they call it football when you don't kick it very often?
7) They've never won the European Football Cup! (We'll get France this time! Just you wait...).

Restate the question without involving 'Patriotism' and then i'll answer it.

ha ha. Don't EVEN try to mess with Pandora!!! She's got all her s*** in one box!!!!

Hi Pan, been missin' you... (don't remember any good emoticons, and no time to look one up )

Emoticons? You mean these?:

yeah, I know. I have 'em all printed out, but no ambition to find them. It's 4:20am though! Time for a BH!!!!

Do you know why a dog licks his balls?

'Coz they taste better than the dog food!

close.

Because they are the most delicious things in the world!!!

*Arms and primes the Railgun*
I'm gonna need this real soon!
...
tastiest...
...thing...
...in...
...the...
...world...
...?...
Eurgh!

That's the point. Dude, would love to hang out and post, but gotta hit the hay. Catch you another time... ICQ, if you do that... my number is on my page.

See ya!

Ya' see Wargamer??? Someone usually comes to defense of the defensless here...in this case, that would be you.

I am Cherokee. My Tribe was in this land before the powered wig wearing men......tried to tame our land. Don't talk to ME about discrimmination.
Do YOU care to call a truce????
Be for the best you...Last time I checked...Tony Blair liked the cut of MY jibe better than yours. Shall we ask him??? I'm sure he wouldn't mind sending a Bobby 'round to tap your skull with a night stick.
Now be a good Brit & toddle off for tea or something. Don't make me resort to...well, just be nice.

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one...he hold the light bulb up to the scoket and waits for the World to revolve around him!