Journal Entries
High School all over again?
Posted Dec 10, 2004
So, I have left work for the final time. Thinking about what it is I am feeling, I have come to a decision on what it is I am feeling.
The last time I remember feeling like this was the night I graduated from High School. Hoping that I and the friends I had made would continue to keep in touch and hang out and such. But somehow knowing that this would not be the case for most of us.
It proved true then and I get the feeling that it will prove true this time around as well. We have all exchanged email addresses and some of us exchanged phone numbers but, out of all those people, how many will I still be in touch with come end of the year when the last of us has left the company?
I know I am sounding somewhat defeatist but, I am looking at this from a realistic standpoint. Also, I am feeling a bit depressed about this whole thing.
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Latest reply: Dec 10, 2004
Laid Off vs Termination
Posted Dec 4, 2004
I've come to a conclusion tonight.
Termination is better, emotionally, than being laid off. Here's my reasoning:
Being laid off is too slow, you have all this time to prepare yourself for the ending of your employment but, you don't make use of that time (at least I have not so far). You have made all these friendships that are more important than you realize and then, they are gone, you will likely never see these people again and you have not even described to them what they have meant to you, the impact they have had on your life.
I hope I NEVER have to go through another lay off again.
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Latest reply: Dec 4, 2004
30
Posted Oct 6, 2004
Today ends yet another stage of my life: the 20's. I approach my 30's with a bit of trepidation, I don't really know what to expect from them. Hopefull they will be more successful that my 20's were.
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Latest reply: Oct 6, 2004
Birthday Wishlist
Posted Sep 27, 2004
As number 30 rapidly approaches I got to thinking what I want for my birthday. In no particular order(accept for #1):
1) Natalie Portman
2) All movies that have Natalie Portman in them.
3) The Star Wars DVD set
4) A couple of million or so dollars, tax free but unlaundered.
5) A house
6) A car
7) Certain political changes
8) My own pool table
9) My own bowling alley
10) To go back to school
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Latest reply: Sep 27, 2004
Situation Normal, All F***ed Up
Posted Sep 6, 2004
Got a call from the ex tonight while I was at Marv's grilling some steaks. Ok, we had finished eating and the ex calls. The convo goes somewhat like this:
"me: what's up?
her: I need to bring the kids home tonight
me: why?
her: some money of my dad's has come up missing and the kids are being blamed. btw, can you take William too?
me: yeah, I can."
She called again ten minutes later.
"me: hello.
her: Are you home?
me: no, I'm just leaving Marv's and will be home in about 20 minutes.
her: When you get home, will you write up a document that says I am giving you custody of the kids?
me: That will take me more than just a few minutes."
So, she brings the kids over and I let her know that I won't be able to take William on a full time basis because the other kids are finally starting to get use to the idea of living without mommy all the time and throwing him back into the mix will undo everything we have done to this point.
Don't get me wrong, if I could take him in I would but I don't see myself being able to right now. He is an extremely difficult child to work with and the other kids would suffer a very noticible decrease in attention.
There are also the matters of he is too old for the daycare the other 2 are in and that I have no legal right to him.
I talked to William and explained my take on the situation:
1) That his grandfather is a fairly trusting and emotional person and that when he feels wronged he often sas something he does not mean.
2) That more than likely, no promises, he (William) will be back with his mom tomorrow (monday) night. No promises.
3) He is not responsible in anyway for what his grandfather feels.
4) That we will find a solution to this problem.
I sent my stepson to bed and told him that if he needs to talk, come talk to me. He shows up 5 minutes later with this question:
"What will happen to me if you cannot find a place for me to go?"
The only answer I could come up with is this: "No need to worry about that right now."
I know that it is not a fair answer and that he will worry regardless but, I don't know what else I could have said.
So, the situation is thus:
1) Some money came up missing at the ex's place.
2) The ex's father does not want any of the children, effectively leaving my stepson no place to live.
3) I do not feel able to take on the care of my stepson.
4) The ex has no other place to live right now except with her dad.
5) William's biological father has not been heard from in several months.
6) William wants to know what's going to happen to him if we cannot find a solution to the issue at hand, where he is concerned.
I am really hoping that we can find a solution to this problem. Poor William has been moved around so much in his 11 years, he doesn't know what a home truly is and is really lacking in confidence right now (more than usual).
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Latest reply: Sep 6, 2004
Good Doctor Zomnker (This must be Tuesday," said GDZ to himself, sinking low over his Dr. Pepper, "I never could get the hang of Tuesdays.")
Researcher U98469
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