h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

....melodious Pink Panthers singing raucously in yellow Submarines in East Yorkshire.

Meanwhile back at the abattoir...

The *Dorset 2* were plotting another escape!....*lets high tail it over to Wales...I hear that there is more action there then in a *tub of lard fat wrestling match* *ok then....but better make sure that we pack the water wings..the Severn can be a bit deep at this time of year*.....so,with a masterful flick of their curly,whirly tails...they unlocked the door of their cattle(Pig!) waggon and.....

...decided to watch 'Dangermouse' instead. It the current episode, Dangermouse's trusty sidekick Penfold is having problems with...

.....his glasses.....which seem to have a developed a will all of their own and......
Hi Wowbagger

slapping him repeadedly up-side his head and screaming "Cheese theif! Cheese theif!"- which to eyeglasses and englishmen is one of the most horrible things an entity can do on this plane of existance. Right up there with taking tea after 5!

Dangermouse sized up the situation immediately and.....

...to become a foundation member of the ancient Order of Two-headed Turtles. (The Procastinator's Society) if and when they finally get around to organising it.

Meanwhile he continued to...

swirl his finger about in his nose, as if he would find some bit of gold or coin lodged deep within his sinuses. He plucked out a rather large, green glob, and proceeded to wipe it on Ginger Spice's skirt.

"What's this? You bloody rat! Look what you've done to my skirt", Ginger screamed in outrage.

"It's not ladylike to say 'bloody'", Dangermouse replied, unperturbed.

"I'll 'ladylike' you, you blighter!", Ginger screamed, and began to chase Dangermouse around the room, doing her best to trample him beneath her spiked heels.

Round and round they went, in an orbit about the mighty struggle going on between the Captain of the Enterprise, and the Captain of the S.S. Minnow.

Gilligan was smoking a doob with secret squirrel, relating how he had once been a cool hipster named Maynard G. Krebbs until someone had hit him over the head with a sackfull of money- and not Canadian dollars either!

Meanwhile, the whales were wondering....

...be terribly confused.

"Holy leather underwear, Batman!" exclaimed Robin. "What are all these people doing in our broom closet?"
"It _is_ getting a little cramped," muttered Gilligan, from somewhere underneath Captain Kirk.
"Quick everyone: into the Tardis!" shouted Lister.

In the Tardis, our heroes met up with a one legged go-go dancer from Crete who tried to...

serve Kirk with a paternity suite. It seems she had been in one of his "ports of call" in his younger days, and had a bit of a fling with him.

"Get... away... I'm... in... a... fight... for... my... life..., or...
at least.... my.... anal.... virginity!", Kirk said, in that Kirk way to her.

"You're a right bounder, aren't you?", Lister said, his hands on his hips and a glint in his eyes as he studied Kirk.

"You... don't.... understand.... it was... the sixties!", Kirk gasped as he struggled with the Skipper.

"So you think you'll get off just by making a reference to a decade?", Lister replied, "I don't think so!....

....the latest convoluted steps of an exotic dance called *The Brind*....a strange mixture of bump and grind........*It's not going at all as I expected it to*.......said...

....said the priest to the nun one dreamy night in the honeymoon suite of the Paris Ritz.

She replied....

"A priest, a rabbi and an athiest walk into a bar. And the preist says to the rabbi...

This forum is getting far too long again....I think that you,me and the athiest better relocate to somewhere new before resuming our interesting conversation
shazz

....so they booked the plushest,most expensive honeymoon suite in the best hotel at :
http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?forum=14180&thread=17560 and continued with the discussion of the day,which was...
shazz

Good grief!!
Now what was all this about!?
shazzPRME

shazz, are you bored or what??
btw, i for the life of me can't remember what this was about LOL!
maybe it was one of those drunken moments
monsy

Hi Monsy
No ICQ atm TM is reconfigging his computer
I would say that this was more then one drunken moment though! I have been idling away the time seeing when *the gang* all met! I have you at 45 weeks ago, and TM at 44!! Not bad!! I started 48 weeks ago now... I think that we have all accomplished quite a lot since we all met up
shazzPRME

no icq??!! i was wondering where you were ...i left you a message saying i must of just missed you.....i'm sitting here doing my morning thing of getting myself in gear to go to work ....meet me over at our forum and i will tell you about it real quick before i go
and yes, we have accomplished quite a bit haven't we?? isn't it amazing how things change without our realizing it?
monsy

OK
Yes... time flies when you're having fun
shazzPRME