h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That predictable, eh?

*Of course I did! It was still weird. *I think I've infected you. That made me laugh (which means that I must have a sick, morbid sense of humour). Yeah, right... *No you have to prove my illusions to be wrong. Anyway, I'm not THAT idealistic. I believe in some values, but I do realize that a lot of them won't be accepted by everyone else. So I go for patience. *I haven't been keeping points for over four months now. *I could believe it, but it's not in sale over here. *It may serve some purpose, but yes, you are broadly correct. *Wow, have you been drinking alcoholic bevvies? Anyway, I don't wish to push this, because I'm too damned lazy, so I'll just accept your answer to a completely different question from the one I asked. *Oh, I think it is. I can't be bothered to explain it, though. Is it? Have I never said so before? Or was it completely unoriginal. ********

No, you lose!

Thought so.

Only in self-defence.

Incredibly.

*Well, there you have it! *I don't think you have. I thought it was amusing, though I'm seriously considering certifying my mother. *You are idealistic, but I'll forgive you. You are terribly impatient which is why you nag. *Brat. *You don't buy icing...you're supposed to make it...*Broadly correct? Nah, I'm completely correct. *No, I haven't but I'm sure the punch was spiked with alcohol and/or a laxative. I refused to ingest it in any quantity. I answered your question and directly. *I don't think it is, but I'll let you keep your illusions. I liked it.**********

Why, I got you to do what I wanted, didn't I?

Then why didn't you say so?

*snort*

Yeah, well, I walked into it knowing how you would respond, so I can't help but feeling some sort of grim satisfaction.

*What does this prove, exactly? *We'll see. Hehe... *Oh, I can be quite patient, but sometimes, nagging serves my purpose better. *Didn't know you cared... *Ah, well, we don't do that in Norway... *Not really, not in this case. *I see. Well, yes and no. I was thinking more along the lines of what we were originally discussing, which I can't remember anymore... *Ah, well... Goot, goot... ********

To say "aww for pete's sake"?

I wanted it verified.

Grim satisfaction, is it? I think I'm insulted.

*I'm not sure, but is that all that important? *So we shall. *You aren't too terribly patient. Nagging is too extreme and too variable. *That you're a brat? *You don't make your own icings?! Surely you're lying. *Not according to you, at least. Since everyone has a different perception, I shall say that I am correct. *What were we originally discussing? *You can't win. Now, I have a question. Do you really count the asterisks you put at the end of this paragraph?*********

Not necessarily that, but something of a similar nature.

Or validated or valified, depending.

Brat.

Why on earth would THAT insult you?

*You can't say "there you have it", if you haven't the faintest idea of what I have... *When, though... *That depends. I've just realized that my usual technique of letting things wait doesn't work over the Atlantic. That depends on your skills at it, and your understanding of the other person. If it helps, I only nag people I know quite well, or otherwise feel I can trust to tell me if I cross the line. *About the scores, of course. *I'm now going to have to check if I've interpreted the word correctly... *In your own, biased, black and white way, yes. *Hmmmm.... Don't know. Check the backlog. *Oh yes, I can. Well, some times, yes. I did once yesterday, but I don't always bother with being too accurate. Rather too many than to few, though.********

Ah, well... whining is such a cheap trick.

Yes.

And proud of it.

Grim isn't exactly nice.

*Egads! Never say that when I'm trying to be GOOD! *squeakswithwildabandon* *You know better to say this when it's wozzled. I'll go completely sappy and uncharacteristically Stacy and start crying. *Damn, so much for not going completely sappy... *Ah, I'll go with the brat part as well. *Icing is frosting. The sweet, sugary stuff that goes on top of cookies and cakes... *But isn't it endearing? *I am much too lazy for that. *I was just wondering. I usually just hold down shift and 8 until it looks like enough.*******

It wasn't whining, it was...fussing...

*bobshead* Too *jumps* Hooba *jumps* stank *jump*

What is coming of today's youth?

Nope, it would be the satisfaction of knowing that I was right, even though I was hoping not to be.

*And why on earth should you be good* Yeah, well, I wasn't referring to "when shall we meet", I was simply asking when you'll get the chance to prove that you're not a pacifist. Well, actually, I think you've got quite a lot of crying to make up for... *Yeah, sorry, but this is what happens when I go wozzled... *Ah, well... *Ah, yes. We do make some of that ourselves, thuogh we can by certain types. But why did you call it "royal somethingorother"? *Of course, I never said anything else. I am fascinated by it, but I cannot agree with it. I suppose it is endearing, in a naïve, silly way... *Same here, which is why I told you to do it in the first place. *I think we're at eight... ********

You said you didn't fuss! Anyway, they're all cheap tricks. Though, of course, I fell for it.

Hmmm... allright. I've just had the BEST python fix ever. We put it up on the classroom projector, and the stereo speakers... And spent the whole eating break watching "And now for something completely different"...

Only the results of our corrupted society. Evolution, I'm afraid, being a brat is quite... attractive these days, it would seem. At least when it comes to guys...

But, still, *grim*?

*Well, being bad is supposed to be bad. I've broken my streak and have completely given up. I had an hour long conversation in a small room, piled on a couch with three guys, discussing every bodily function as well as discussing the most common mechanism of the transfer of AIDS. It was...amusing. *Yes, well, I was in a hopelessly sappy and wozzled mood. I'm not a pacifist; I like fighting. No, because, once I get crying, I don't stop for a long, long time. *Not too wozzled now, are you? Weee... *And the farmers and the lumberman and the men who worked the mills and the poor, hardworking miners that died inside the hills...Yeah, I really need to stop. *You can buy icings over here, too, but it's not edible unless you eat it right out of the can. Royal icing is the name of a hard, super-sweet icing. *I shall say the same for you. I am fascinated by your reasoning, but I cannot agree with it. It's endearing, in a naïve, silly way. Idealism has always been lost on me. I wrote an extremely nasty essay once on Wilson and his cursed idealism. At least yours is reasonable. *Bah, we're both lazy and neither of us cares about looking back for it. *Eight. Lovely number, that...***********

I don't fuss. I was particularly wozzled when I wrote that. I TAKE IT ALL BACK! Cheap, are you? I'll admit I am for some things.

Oooh, I envy you. Actually, I don't because I've been considering how unenvious I am as a person. Strange. Anyway. I'm not going to sing, I refuse to sing. Damn, I'm singing.

Nah, but people can't stand brats so they just pass them all by and let them get away with everything. I like strong and silent or strong and silly. Whininess gets to me after awhile.

Maybe not. I get that the word means something stronger in English than it does in Norwegian...

*Yeah, well, that's just what they want you to think. Sounds like loads of fun... *I thought so. I do wonder what this is, though. Allright, I'll just stand back and watch, I still think I might have infected you... Well, perhaps you need it? Crying on your own is horrible, though... *Not then, no. I'm not sure now, because I'm too hungry to feel any such thing... *Hehehe... you're good at quoting songs I haven't heard, or at least not heard for a long while... *Is it an icing you make yourself? I have to admit we don't use icing a lot over here. *Yeah, I suppose it is, but it works for me, for now. I am of course open to the fact that some of my idealism will disappear in time, to be replaced by cynisism and experience, but I will try and keep some of it, because it's nice to believe that the world is a nice place. Idealism, in its extreme form is just stupid. I try and make the world a better place, but I won't kill for it. I suppose experience counts more than reasoning. *Yes. *Indeed it is. Have you got such a thing as a lucky number? ********

Hehe. Allright, for now, but I will remember this... Yeah, well, maybe I am too.

Damn, I forgot to answer the last two threads/sentences/things...

Hehehehehehehe... Too bad I can't hear it...

Not really, some people are attracted by it. Being nice rarely pays off in any way other than the purely idealistic one. I wonder if I could pass for strong and silly?

Grim...here, let me look.

*Sadly, it was fun. I didn't tell you about the chicken discussion. I'll just say that we were all giddy from lack of sleep and overindulgence in caffeine. Haha. Sorry. *I do, too. You haven't infected me because I pinched Keither this morning. Nah, it gives me the most awful headache and I look like a smushed, rotten tomato. Agreed, it is. *Why don't you eat?? *That's Jim Croce. *I don't think you can buy royal icing because it gets hard once it cools and doesn't get squishy again. I make it, but I'll look. You don't use frosting much? *For now. Ah, well, change isn't always good. I appreciate and can tolerate your brand because it has some decent footings. Most idealistic people make me want to gag. *Are you trying to kill another asterisk? *Actually, no. I've never been that into lucky things. I did have a lucky person two years ago, but that was more of a joke.*********

Maybe, if I don't say a word. *titters*

No, be glad you can't hear me singing.

Yeah, I think you could pass as strong and silly.

Yes?

*Yeah, well, I did something like that lsat night. We ended up discussing studio gibli films, though... *Bothersome, isn't it? Damn, well, pinching is better than punching, I'd say you're getting there. Yeah, but I still think it's better to get it out. *I needed my internet fix. I've now ingested a huge amount of lasagna, and I'm feeling much better, though slightly, but only slightly, wozzled. *I see. I have to get hold of some of his tracks when I get broadband... *Aha. I see. No, we don't. Well, it depends on the cake, I've never heard of this Royal version before. What does it contain, just icing sugar, or what else? *Yes. I'm young, and I'm aware of it, but I won't let go of my wishes. I never said it was. Hehe, well, I've lived out on the countryside for quite a while, that gives you decent footings. *Nope, I was just going to let you do the work by saying something funny. *Neither have I, to be honest. A lucky person? That's an intersting concept... ********

No, I'll remember this, because I have now had proof that you fuss when you're wozzled. I suppose you could claim temporary insanity at the time of the incident, but I will still remember this.

Well, look at it this way: It's either a nice song, or a great source of cheap entertainment....

Thanks, I suppose I owe you a confidence boost now?

grim - shockingly repellent; inspiring horror; "ghastly wounds"; "the grim aftermath of the bombing"; "the grim task of burying the victims"; "a grisly murder"; "gruesome evidence of human sacrifice"; "macabre tales of war and plague in the Middle ages"; "macabre tortures conceived by madmen"

*Gibli films? Strange how conversations can turn. *Not particularly. Well, I would have punched him, but there were parental units about. Hmm, sometimes. *Oh, lasagna. I'm feeling a teensie bit wozzled. *He's magical. I saw his son live, once, but it couldn't compare. Sorry, AJ. *You use it on cookies. Water, sugar, cornstarch...hmm, I can't remember off the top of my head. *Actually, those who have lived in the country for all of their lives and have never done any travelling are the most naive. *By saying something funny? Hmm, what does a fish say when it hits a wall? *Like I said, it was more of a joke. I usually write seven or twenty-seven pages in my journal at night, so maybe those are lucky? You've never had one?*********

Yes, I was temporarily insane when I wrote it. I don't fuss, and I'm not completely in control of myself when I'm wozzled.

Or both. I somehow got Madame Butterfly stuck in my head and sang that all day on Wednesday. I even remembered the twenty minute dance routine that went with it.

Sure, go for it.

There you are, in Norway it's not half as strong.

*Studio gibli - lovely anime studio. Yes, especially with two overtired computer geeks and three others who are vaguely interested in computers, and very interested in computers. *I see... Ah, well, I suppose I'll just have to be patient and wait... Good. *Lasagna is lovely, I hope there's some left when I get home today... Mmmmmm *Less than a week now... Weeeee... *We don't bake a lot of cookies over here, it's mostly cakes... *Yes, but they're still down to earth. I've had a nice combination, I think. *You usually come up with something absurd and silly. Ouch? *I see. Well, interesting, I like twenty-seven. Never a real lucky number, no... ********

Hehe. I think you just said more than you meant to...

Yes, I suppose so... Why don't you think I would like to hear it, then?

Hmmm... Well, I think you're great, but you already know that, so I'll say that you're silly, but in a very endearing way.

Ah, then I'll forgive you.

*I don't really hate anime all that much, I just don't understand the fascination with it. *You can wait all you want. Wrestling is my favorite thing to do, and that will never change. *I love Italian food. I think I'm going to make pasta tonight. I haven't made pasta in a long time. Making pasta is almost as comforting as making bread. *Weeeeee, indeed. *I love cookies. A special place in my little pink heart is reserved for cookies. You need to start making cookies. *Practical and DTE. That's close to DNE. We're doing limits in math, so I'm chanting 'as x approaches cero...' Sadness. You do have a nice combination, and you're relatively well informed. *I do try. No, he says 'DAMN!' Get it? I thought everyone had heard that joke. *collapsesintogiggles* *It's a friendly number, methinks. Lucky object?*********

Oy, I do tend to type things and completely disregard alternate meanings. Sheesh.

Because I completely zone out when I start dancing.

Similar to what I told you. *bows*

Thank you.

*I can agree with that. I'm not extremely fascinated with it, but I find that some of the stories are amazingly deep, compared to your normal movies... *Ah, well, wrestling is one thing, it's ebing violent with the intention of harming another person - for whatever reason - that I'm against. If people go into a ring and beat each other up voluntarily, then that's their choice, even if I think it's kinda stupid. I also like violent computer games, as you might remember. *I love making pasta. It's frigtfully simple, and yet so lovely... Mmmmm... *Feeling the envy yet? No, you said you rarely envy people... *I like them too, but we only buy them over here. Perhaps I would enjoy them more if I started making them... *Yup. Oh, sadness. Ah, well, at least you'll be done with it soon. Relatively well informed is what i could say for you as well, I suppose. But thanks. *I got it. I haven't heard it before, because I'm Norwegian. *Yes, it is, thought I don't know why. Nopers. No such things. I don't believe in luck, mathematics have wrecked that belief for me. ********

Yes, that's a rather normal thing to do...

Even more amusing, then...

Yeah, I suppose so. I'm not horribly original, but we're so similar to begin with, that it's hard to come up with new things...

Not at all, not at all...

*I tend to analyze the faults of the movies, more than the story line. It's amazing what I can do to 'Casablanca', though even I view it as a form of sacrilege. *I'm not a sadist, but I'm hardly pacifistic. You aren't the vengeful type, but I certainly am. Senseless violence aimed at...at...cartoon characters. *Prrrrrrrrrrr, it makes me feel fuzzy inside. What's strange is that it took forever for me to be able to make it correctly. *I don't have strong feelings of envy, though I probably should. I'll try to culture that in. *That's entirely too strange. Definitely start making them. They're one of the most versatile foods in the world. *Actually, I'm really enjoying the calculus portion of this. I understand it, sadly. Well, I didn't call you a bumbling idiot at least, no? *Hmmm, another one then. A man walks into a bar. What does he say? *Mathematics didn't have that chance. I think you make your own decisions.***********

Truly?

I'd imagine it is. Frightening, at times. Sometimes I'll start and not realize what I'm doing until I do something that hurts my bum leg. Usually, if I get to that point, a complete shutdown of all mental systems are soon to come.

Then let's stop complimenting each other; it kind of confuses me.

I just did something AWFUL. I feel terrible. Poor, poor Beegie was running in through the door and I moved my knee to block her. I kneed the poor thing in the EYE! Her big ol' eye is all bloodshot now. AAAAAAAAAAAGH!

Nonetheless...

*Hehe, that's also amusing, but only if the movie is boring or uninteresting. *Did I say you were a sadist? I'm sure I didn't mean to say that. I suppose our horoscopes summed that up, too... No, I'm definately the sort of moderate person. I think our backgrounds have led to that. And it's fun. *It does, doesn't it? Sort of heavy and nice... Did it? Why? *I'd prefer it if you didn't envy me. *It's just american culture, that's all. I'll see what I can do. Could you email me some recipes? *Well, that's good. No, you didn't. I suppose I should be grateful for what I get... *Never heard that one either. *Decisions, yes, but can you govern chance? ********

Truly.

Ah, well... I'd still like to see it...

Why, because you're getting deja-vu's?

Awwwwwwww...

Might as well?

*I love Casablanca, but I can't help myself. I might not do it outloud immediately, but I'm always analyzing it. *It was sort of implied, but I understand. Indeed, they did. Video games and computer games have never been something I was into. The MYST series is a completely different matter...*I would knead it until it was tough and then run it through the squisher. *Does it make you uncomfortable? *cockshead* *As long as you don't mind doing the conversions, I can send you millions of recipes. I'm awful at conversions. *As you should. I might even give you this: you're not a half-bad human bean. *He says, 'OUCH!' *tittersinsanely* *But does chance exist?*********

Muy interesante.

And you may well get the chance. I try not to do it so often anymore; it gets much too frustrating.

Nah, it's just kind of...confusing.

Poor Bear, poor, poor Bella.

Just possibly...

*I suppose we're just a bit different when it comes to that. Might have something to do with that hyperactivity of yours, no? *Sowwy. Like I said, I didn't mean that at all. Interesting, isn't it? They're quite entertaining, but they're not exactly very good for mental or physical development. I still haven't played MYST... I suppose I should... Hmmmm. **Why on earth did you do that? *Not really, but I would always prefer it if people were happy, and envy is a very self-destructive feeling. *Like I said in the email I've just sent you, Mathematica can do that. *Me? I'm perfect in every way... **giggle** All chance is governed by something, but we humans have so far been unable to control it. At some point, quantum mechanics enter into this, and everything goes completely random and nonsensical...********

Why is that?

Yes, I suppose I will...

Why? Do you expect me to dislike you, or something?

How is she now, then?