h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have no idea just what the boys do with their socks.
They never bring them all, then they come and complain that they don't have any fresh socks.

What do boys do with socks?

When I was a little girl and we lived in a house with an upstairs and a downstairs, my father was always yelling up the stairs to us not to make such a racket, so we learnt to walk light-footedly and were thus quite easy on our socks. Apart from which he yelled at us if he saw us walking in just socks with no slippers or shoes. He said it was an insult to our mother who had washed and ironed them an we were making them unnecessarily dirty (honestly, my mother still irons socks. She says it helps make those toe seams I mentioned above less lumpy).

Anyway, my boys never really understood any of that. And I never bothered trying to instill these ideas into them. They therefore walk around the house and garden in their socks, using a heavy, grinding walking technique that wears holes into the heels after the first wearing. Also, of course, it grinds the dirt into the soles (and the rest, but don't ask me how) of the socks, rendering any efforts made by me or my washing machine futile.

I think they pull them up pretty savagely, too, using both fists, so that the elastic around the top is stretched to uselessness after the first couple of weeks.

There are probably other, horrible things, boys do with socks that I don't want to think about, although the image of Mr Bean washing his lettuce in the park fountain does spring to mind at this moment.

There you go - and Ialways thought they had holes in their socks so soon because their feet secrete some sort of acidic sweat.

I must admit I don't mind buying socks - and I love sneaker socks.
But I have to explain: I don't like wearing socks, so I buy only a few pairs, and only because I cannot wear my boots in winter without socks, or my feet bleed - and that's why I prefer the sneaker socks (Bel, the reason their have that name is that you can wear them in sneakers and it looks as if you don't wear socks)

I only have one problem: since I rarely wear them they get lost - and of course none of my children has seen them or wore them.... (sometimes I don't like that ghost here named "wasn't me")

Matodemi: we don't have 'sneakers', really. It's just ridiculous to call them this. Next we'll start to call Turnschuhe trainers.

In defence of men...

I used to be pretty liberal with my treatment of socks, when I was a student. Sometimes they made it as far as the sink, to be rinsed through (usually whe they were too stiff to be put on in the morning). Other times they ended up under the bed, and were discovered at the end of term when I was packing up to take al my washing home for Mum.

However, since being married, I found that my ears hurt a lot less if I put my socks in the wash basket, end even less if I put them there the same day I took them off!

The problem seems to be that the washing machine has aquired a taste for socks.

I have, in my sock-drawer, a roll of socks which are waiting for their pair to appear. It is an evolving entity, changing in size week by week, sometimes with only two or three socks, sometimes having as many as seven or eight.

I point out to The Missus that as I put them into the basket as a pair, surely they should return as a pair, but apparently this is not the case with our machine. I have also been told that the alternative is that I try doing it myself.

But that would deprive the washing machine of it's food...

"they should return" - you make it sound like they do that automatically

Black socks, they never get dirty,
The longer you wear them the stronger they get!
Sometimes I think I should wash them
But something keeps telling me
No, no, not yet!

No black socks among the pairs I bought - will navy blue do, too?

Come back automatically?

Of course they don't!

That's what I have a wife for...

I tuck the ankle end of one sock into the ankle end of the other to guarantee that they go into the machine as a pair. They separate during the wash but I always dry each of a pair next to each other on the line or radiator.

Perhaps Bel and Trillian's Child should set up a website: Socks reunited?

but surely you only need to wash socks once they wont bend...even after bludgeoning them with a hammer. So they shouldn't get lost too often.

My worn-out or long-single socks just get nailed to the bathroom ceiling. If I do find a match at some point, I can just take the other one down...

due to son and daughter(sock pincher's)all my socks have exactly the same pattern on, that way I know which are mine and I've never an odd pair

I used to buy all black socks so I didn't have to bother pairing them. Everyone else in the family unfortunately found it a good idea and did the same which was a problem as I have quite big feet. Now I buy socks that are as unique as possible, normally bright and stripy, and I haven't had a sock go missing for a long time. My daughter's more choosy than I am and likes socks with owls on them

I had a problem buying socks a while ago too. Firstly it was hard to find some, and when I did, I thought they were really overpriced.

My problem, though, is shoe shopping. I hate it. I have awkward feet (narrow, little to no arch so I need a strap or my feet slide down to the front and crush my toes) and I don't like big heels.

I buy all identicle socks which is a pity as many years ago I used to like having peculiar/funny/bright socks.
now once a year (useually in the January sales), I go out and buy 14 pairs of identicle socks, 14 pairs of identicle knickers, bring them home and put all my old socks and old knickers into the dustbin and then put all the new ones into the drawers boring but saves the hastle Of course, as I put each new sock and knickers into the draw, I add them to a new database for that years clothes, giving each sock, knickers shirt etc its own unique identification number and so I can cross refernce the location of the item with its colour and date of purchase.
Waht?
Doesn't everyone keep a database of their clothes?
I'm just hoping soon I can buy some of those radio identification tags that I can sew into each item of clothing, so I can track the whereabouts of each item on the database

a database for clothes - good idea
not that it was worth the effort with the few clothes I have, but I know someone in my family... *no I am not looking into my daughters direction*

socks with a sat nav on

yeh... Just imagine how cool that would be......
'oh no, I can't find sock SB13',
*turns on radio tag ID finding thing*
'Ahh sock SB13 appears to be in the utility room'
*looks behind washing machine*
'ahh sock SB13 there you are
*puts code SB13 into clothes database*
'Ahh sock SB13 should be stored in position LD1/BL2'
*puts sock in appropiate drawer on appropiate side of the drawer*