h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've no idea Doctor. But then again I'm more of an M&S type. Or do I mean S&M? I always get those 2 mixed up. Causes no end of trouble, I can tell you.

Personally I like big pants. They're easier for me to parade around the house in when Mrs. Strangegloves is away.

Magster - definitely open all hours here. It's my ambition to get paid while posting away - but have not managed it so far!

Sorry to hear about your sprouts. I will try to remember to post the reminder in good time this year.

I thought you were a thong person, Doc.

Isn't strange how you have these images of people?

Whereas Ali, I can imagine you in a peephole...hang on, this has gone far enough...I'm a happily married amn, don't you know.

Doc,

Just checking - isn't "happily married man" an oxymoron?

I don't need oxymorons. I don't have spots anymore.

Hazel, no doubt I shall see you later then I have just infiltrated the boys only posts, I may live to regret that move.

Hazel,

We have Magster. We will exchange her for 6 Lamb Bhunas, 2 Chicken Tikka Masalas, 4 Pilau Rice, 6 Keema Nans, 2,720 Popadums and a gallon jar of spicy chutney. Oh, and 200 bottles of Cobra.

Best pay up quick, Bushy's getting that look in his eye (constipation).

B*llocks. Who wants some?

Who wants a wrestle?

Hello Hazel and Magster Oh and hello you new men what are interested in cooking and stuff.

Thanks Hazel for the timely reminder about putting my hot cross buns in for Easter. What would I do without you?

I'll manage to pop on here Magster at weekends too, when I can get away from dusting my 'fridge and polishing the curtains.

I just love being a woman and talking about housework, don't you? I'm sure we'll just prattle on for HOURS about it! Yippee!

(Better than men things like football etc - I mean, yeuch!)

You girls just spend all your time talking about willies and stuff.

Yeah, and any problems they're having with their giblets. Disgusting.

We do Ali.

Willy do the washing up?

Willy wash the bleedin' car?

Willy remember to put the rubbish?

Men!

Of course he won't! He's a man.

Sarnia,

If he's going to do all that for himself what the hell does he need a woman for?

Max, to spend all his money of course!

Now, get out of my way. I've hoovering to do before Mr. Sarnia returns and if I don't have supper on the table the moment he walks in then I'll be for it, I can tell you.

Quite right too: get on with it.

Yes, "A woman's work never gets done" as they say. Something like that, anyway...