h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Starts screaming and throws skule bag full of heavy books and folders at the freezer to try and break it*

*a kidly policman escorts Alpha out of the forum*

*watches this with a mildly amused expression on her face*

*runs back in, starts screaming and kicking at the freezer to try and break it so the cheesecake gets destroyed*

*wonders if this is normal behaviour*

*waits for the men in white coats to turn up*

*puts on riot music defeningly loudly and starts screaming along with it, jumping up and down on the freezer to try and smash it but has no success, so turns up the music to volume 10000000000000*

*decides to blast Motzart out at the level generally referred to as 'Are you crazy!!!!" which is supposed to be amusing but isn't in music videos*

*after years of aural abuse, Natalie is now immune to sound*

*hums along to Beethovens 9th*

*throws mozrt off a cliff and puts on ATR live at brixton academy on full blast to try and blow up everyone's heads with the white noise*

*thinks Brixton Academy smells of urine*

*wonders if RGW even knows what brixton academy is and turns it up a little louder*

*would personally eat her extensive hat collection if Nate didn't*

Durh, me no know what Brixton Academy be.... no sireee...

*face darkens*

*resists the temptation to correct AC in a somewhat rude and violent manner*

*resists urge to encourage Nate*

*turns off brixton academy and puts on Alec Empire - Death Funk on so loudly you can hear it perfectly all around h2g2 in hope of making Alasdair speak to her again cos for some reason he isn't and she didn't do anything so she wants an explanation and in frustration pees herself as she is desperate for the loo and has just seen a flea the size of a fly and a massive zit on her neck and turns up the Alec Empire as loud as it will go and even louder than that*

*resists urge to say something b##chy*

*decides to take no notice of existential elevator and continues speaking to the voices in her head*

*does not quote the "you're just jealous coz the voices talk to /me/" line*

*Nate wonders if this is the time to start taking notice of hers*

REDRUM REDRUM REDRUM REDRUM