h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I was spending an hour in the gym, three times a week and kidding myself
I was exercising the weight away.
I've been kidding myself for over an year so far and blaming the washing
machine for shrinking my jeans.

I bought some Philadelphia cheese as an evening treat on oatcakes thinking
it was fairly calorie free.
I was enjoying it until I read the label.

Ok, new resolution, more exercise.

I hate losing weight, but I hate the thought of disability later on, too. So, the doctor scared me into limiting my carbs, and now I'm replacing all my pants with narrower-waisted ones. I don't like to change my routine, so I hope this is the last change for a long time.

I hope so too, Paul. After seeing the difference between how my mother-in-law (who never exercised or ate well) and my parents (who've exercised and eaten well for a few decades now) get around, I know I should start getting into better shape. It might not seem like such a big deal now, but by the time we all hit our 70's it catches up with you, and it could be the difference between being able to walk and live alone, and being disabled!

This has gotten rather ... ahem ... heavy, hasn't it?

I could make it lighter.

An ex-colleague of mine from my fire service days was fanatical about keeping fit.
He cycled miles, went roaming on the mountains and worked out in the gym.
Last year he had a massive heart attack (his family has a history of men dropping dead from
heart attacks).
Ok, you might think that was ironic given his keep-fit regimen,
but according to the specialist he'd have died if he hadn't exercised so
much.

Plus, people whose work is to put out fires invariably breathe in some smoke, which is not good for their health.

How much oif a recovery is he likely to have?

Then again, my brother-in-law doesn't exercise, still smokes and had his 4th heart attack a couple of months ago ... ya never know!

His recovery has been pretty good although he has to take so many pills
he rattles, but he has started work again.

Speaking of smoke inhalation; crazy I know, but after a fire we would gather
round the tender and light up a cigarette.

I don't know about rattling, but I've been taking many pills for decades now. As long as they keep me alive, I keep taking them.

That's a pretty good incentive for taking them.
I suspect that the amount of pills a person takes is correlated to age.

You are undoubtedly right.

Ol' Bob Dylan wished us to, "be forever young" and I've tried my best.
My mind is ok but my body isn't sticking with the plan.

Bodies never do. Minds don't either, but they trick you into thinking they're as sharp as ever, when they aren't.

That sounds very much like my mind. Everything is fine until I bump into someone
I haven't seen in a while and greets me by name.
I'm going, "oh hello there....um.....uh"
That's when I realise my mind has let me down.

It's not the same mind any more, Mistadrong. Your body has none of the cells that it had seven years earlier...

Goodness! That means this is a whole new me!
Can I have the old me back please?

On a cellular basis, the old one is dead.

That sounds like my previous cellular phone.
I've just bought a new super-duper one that let me play games on it, listen
to music or the radio, take photos or videos, text people.

Oh, and make phone calls.
Call me an old Luddite but that's pretty much what I need in a phone.

I hear ya, Mista.

My newest one is back to basics - 4 little games, takes some dodgy pics and is mainly used for phone and text.

I'm not yet 32 and my mind keeps dipping into a comatose state on a daily basis. How much worse can it get?

How much worse?


Be afraid, be very afraid.