This is the Message Centre for Wrinkled Rocker
Where's this going?
Wrinkled Rocker Posted Jun 25, 2002
Wassamadder? Don't you like hamburger in hotpants? 
Where's this going?
Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! Posted Jun 25, 2002
That reminds me of the mumblers joke, which unfortunately is a little rude for posting here
Bassman 
Where's this going?
Wrinkled Rocker Posted Jun 25, 2002
Yeah! I know them - out here we call them whisper shorts! I think I posted one somewhere ... or it may have been an e-mail.
This chatting everywhere in different guises is most confussing! 
Where's this going?
Gwennie Posted Jun 25, 2002
T'was me that you mentioned the 'whisper shorts' to old WR boy! 
I'll never be able to eat another spring onion again without thinking of penile dysfunction... 
Speed Limit
A State Police officer observed a car puttering along the highway at 22 mph. He turned on his lights and pulled the car over. Approaching the vehicle, he noticed that it contained five old ladies - two in the front seat and three in the back - wide-eyed and white as ghosts.
The driver, obviously confused, said, "Officer, I don't understand. I was doing exactly the speed limit. What's the problem?"
"Ma'am," the officer replied, "You weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit? I'm following the posted speed exactly!"
The officer, trying to contain a chuckle, explained that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit. Embarrassed, the woman smiled and thanked him for pointing out her error. Before letting her go, the officer asked, "Is everyone in this car okay? These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a single peep this whole time."
"Oh, they'll be alright in a minute, officer. We just got off Route 119."
Where's this going?
Wrinkled Rocker Posted Jun 26, 2002
They can be glad they didn't have to travel on our Route 555! 
Where's this going?
Fluffy Pink Rabbit Posted Jun 26, 2002
Or Route 495 in Massachusetts!
I sometimes drive on Route 85 through Northborough
and Marlborough. It is tempting to go 85 miles an
hour through there, but there are lakes on both
side of the road, plus a hospital and two cemeteries.
They've got you covered if you drive into one
of the lakes. 
Where's this going?
Gwennie Posted Jun 26, 2002
LOL!
In Malta there are little 'shrines' at regular intervals along the roads and I was told that these were where fatal road accidents had occurred. 
Mind you, it didn't fill one full of confidence to notice that many of the 1950's public busses had small shrines erected inside.
After spending a couple of holidays in Malta, I have arrived at the conclusion that the nearly all Maltese choose to drive on the shady side of the road and think they're a Formula One racing driver... I'm also convinced that the bus drivers have a running competition as to the level of sheer terror they can instil in their passengers.
Where's this going?
Fluffy Pink Rabbit Posted Jun 27, 2002
Is Malta the place where malted milk was invented?
Where's this going?
Wrinkled Rocker Posted Jun 27, 2002
Howzitmychina! You can be glad your name isn't Freddy and you're not fickle...
That makes me think of that happy gay couple Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald for some reason...
(Thinks: Is that going to get me moderated or what?)
Who? Me? Naah! Never!
Where's this going?
Gwennie Posted Jun 27, 2002
I can't believe that's butter...It looks more like 
ice-cream! 
Haven't you been moderated yet WR? Tsk! Shame on you!
Where's this going?
Wrinkled Rocker Posted Jun 28, 2002
Phreddy PhicklePhucker?
Wotasillybunt!
***
What happened to that other posting days a go that got moderated? Was it you and is it still 'being considered' in some way? I'm dying to see what raised the ire of the lurking censor!
ice cream ... ... melting over warm skin...
Who says eating can't be erotic? 
Where's this going?
Fluffy Pink Rabbit Posted Jun 30, 2002
I've never been moderated, Wrinkled Rocker .
I've been 
ed at a lot, but that's to
be expected.
I don't want to go out on a limb,
unless it's attached to Kim Basinger.
Where's this going?
Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! Posted Jun 30, 2002
Heard about the two gay Scotsmen - Ben Doon & Phil McCaverty
Bassman
Where's this going?
Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! Posted Jul 2, 2002
Kim Basinger never REALLY did it for me - don't know why, she's got all the right bits in all the right places....
Bassman
Where's this going?
Gwennie Posted Jul 2, 2002
Kim Bassinger never did anything for me either, or my better half come to think of it.
Right bits in the wrong places? I thought those were the symptoms of getting old!
"Politically Correct" Male Descriptions.....
He does not have a beer gut...
He has developed a Liquid Grain Storage Facility.
He is not quiet...
He is a Conversational Minimalist.
He is not stupid...
He suffers from Minimal Cranial Development.
He does not get lost all the time...
He discovers Alternative Destinations.
He is not balding...
He is in Follicle Regression.
He is not a cradle robber...
He prefers Generationally Differential Relationships.
He does not get falling-down drunk...
He becomes Accidentally Horizontal.
He does not have his head up his ass...
He suffers from Rectal-Cranial Inversion.
He is not short...
He is Anatomically Compact.
He does not have a rich daddy...
He is a Recipient of Parental Asset Infusion.
He does not constantly talk about cars...
He has a Vehicular Addiction.
He does not have a hot body...
He is Physically Combustible.
He is not unsophisticated...
He is Socially Challenged.
He does not eat like a pig...
He suffers from Reverse Bulimia.
He is not a bad dancer...
He is Overly Caucasian.
He is not a sex machine...
He is Romantically Automated.
He does not hog the blankets...
He is Thermally Unappreciative.
He is not a male chauvinist pig...
He has Swine Empathy.
He does not undress you with his eyes...
He has an Introspective Pornographic Moment.
He is not afraid of commitment...
He is Monogamously Challenged.
"Politically Correct" Female Descriptions.....
She does not: Get PMS
She becomes: HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL
She does not have: A Killer Body
She is: GEOMETRICALLY SUPERIOR
She is not: A Bad Cook
She is: MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE
She is not: A Bad Driver
She is: AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED
She is not: Easy
She is: HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE
She does not: Wear Too Much Make-Up
She is: COSMETICALLY OVER-SATURATED
She will never: Gain Weight
She will become: A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER
She is not: A Screamer Or Moaner
She is: VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE
She will never: Sag
She will become: GRAVITATIONALLY CHALLENGED
She does not have: Big Hair
She is: OVERLY AEROSOLED
Where's this going?
Wrinkled Rocker Posted Jul 2, 2002
Gwennie, I drool over most unattainable female forms of superior aesthetic value... Strangely enough, I still think that Sophia Loren is one of the sexiest women ever! Melanie Griffith, etc. all ring my bell - as long as they are REAL women - I don't go for stiff silicone-supplemented hand-holds. 
Nothing like a nicely tipped real C-cup to draw my attention 
====================
Recent research has revealed that the most common fantasy among married women is to have two men at once.....
One to do the cooking and one to clean the house!
Where's this going?
Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! Posted Jul 2, 2002
I saw a fridge magnet recently that said....
Middle age, is where a broad mind and a narrow waist change places!!
Bassman
Where's this going?
Gwennie Posted Jul 3, 2002
Oh yeah? And just how old are you Bassman...
I give you fair warning to tread carefully as I only attained the official status of being 'middle aged' two days ago...
*Wonders whether she should check her waist measurement, just to be on the safe side*
John says that his favourite ladies (apart from me - he's still grovelling re the lack of a my pwessie!) are Joanna Lumley and Helena Bonham-Carter.
Where's this going?
Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! Posted Jul 3, 2002
A Bassman is as old as the woman he feels
Well that depends on your definition of middle age I suppose.
I think Joanna Lumley has improved immesurably with age, she didn't do it for me as Purdey in the New Avengers.
I've always really liked Filicity Kendal, but there again, so has the majority of the male population of the UK. I used to have a picture of her in a basque and stockings 
Bassman
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- 61: Wrinkled Rocker (Jun 25, 2002)
- 62: Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! (Jun 25, 2002)
- 63: Wrinkled Rocker (Jun 25, 2002)
- 64: Gwennie (Jun 25, 2002)
- 65: Wrinkled Rocker (Jun 26, 2002)
- 66: Fluffy Pink Rabbit (Jun 26, 2002)
- 67: Gwennie (Jun 26, 2002)
- 68: Fluffy Pink Rabbit (Jun 27, 2002)
- 69: Wrinkled Rocker (Jun 27, 2002)
- 70: Gwennie (Jun 27, 2002)
- 71: Wrinkled Rocker (Jun 28, 2002)
- 72: Fluffy Pink Rabbit (Jun 30, 2002)
- 73: Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! (Jun 30, 2002)
- 74: Wrinkled Rocker (Jun 30, 2002)
- 75: Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! (Jul 2, 2002)
- 76: Gwennie (Jul 2, 2002)
- 77: Wrinkled Rocker (Jul 2, 2002)
- 78: Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! (Jul 2, 2002)
- 79: Gwennie (Jul 3, 2002)
- 80: Bassman - Funny how people never ceases to amaze me! (Jul 3, 2002)
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