h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Dear Dimitri,

Well I never knew that when I got cramp in tthe calves of my legs that it was called a charley horse. It used to be incredibly sore and I could very rarely get it to go away even if I tried to massage it. I never tried jumping around. !!Someone told me that it was because I had too little salt in my system.

I have had both my eyes fixed with new lenses due to cataracts. I still often have only peripheral vision. but it was absolutely wonderful straight after the o0eration when I was able to see everything so clearly and beautifully. I was in tears at the joy of it.

I suppose the older one gets, the more one's body wears out. !!

I should compose a tune called

"I am long past my sell-by date,
sell-by date,
sell-by date!
I am long past my sell-by date
And all I do is laugh all day. !1

That keeps me going. !

Oh dear. such feeble pleasures. But I am off swimming to morrow. In the pool in the next seaside town.

Can anyone tell me if I dreamt seeing a whole lot of entries on beetroot last night?

I was so tired I did not have time to read them properly.
Perhaps I dreamt it. But I am looking for it because there was a very lengthy one on what a wonderful vegetable beetroot is.

Thanks for any information you can give me. Incidentally Paul H you are getting so many replies to your postings it takes me hours to read through them all

The joy of being popular. !1

Go well

Christiane
AR80

8/XII/2009 7.14 GMT

Most of my journals are about my wacky dreams. I've been having a lot of them lately.

maybe you had a beetroot overdose?

Dear Christiane: I found the beetroot discussion - it was here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/brunel/F2130683?thread=7133989&skip=0&show=20 I'm going to have my second eye done on 28 December. I need a special lens - it's shaped like a doughnut. (The rest of them on this thread are scratching their heads. They'll find out - I just got mine early. Wait fifteen years, you guys, that's when they usually come.) What to do about charley horses? - Some people say, sleep with your feet on a bar of soap. I would call this the 'Prof Animal Chaos Solution'... - Wear socks in bed. This keeps your feet warm, anyway. - When one starts, you foot will jerk downward. Pull it up as hard as you can. Fight it. - Jump up and walk around on it, cursing loudly, waking up your companion, and making the dog howl. - Drink plenty of water. This will ensure that you get up in the night, thus interrupting the charley horse's plans. - Take vitamins. (Can't hurt.) Anybody got any more charley horse remedies? Love, Dmitri

Is there any way to ensure that they won't occur?

Well, my mom and sisters swore by the little booties my mother crocheted. They said keeping the feet warm worked. (My fault for being too whatever to wear them.)

I've never tried the soap thingy.

Off to do research...

I very rarely get charley horse trouble. Does regular exercise help any?

According to the experts on the web, yes. But not too much - apparently they can be caused by too little exercise, too much exercise, or...

...for no particular reason.

Dear Paul and Dimitri,

i suffered from charley-horses when I was pregnant and for yoicks afterwards. the doctors always told me it wsas either too much or too little salt. it could not have been because I was pregnant, because I presume you were not in that happy state.
However, a researcher should never presume anything, so who knows........... !!

Much affection

Christiane.

Tuesday 9/XII?2009

Tuesday 8/XII/2009

Dear Christiane:

I can assure you I was not enceinte.

Salt is a good thought. Much reading of food labels has made me irate about the quantity of unnecessary sodiumm in packaged foods.

This sodium is not even good salt. For good salt, get sea salt. It has real trace elements in it. That other stuff is a noxious chemical.

Grumpily,

Dmitri

Dear Dimitri

I agree with you completely. naturellement.

glad to know you were not enceinte. !!

I always use and have always used. rock sea salt.

velly good it is !!

Christiane

9/XII/2009 18.25 GMT

*makes notes to self: don't eat too much salt and don't get pregnant*

One out of two ain't bad.

indeed

And don't roll in the snow

yellow snow in particular

Oh Pierce the

You and Paul H really make my day and now Dimitri has joined the happy trio.

Won't you join me swimming the channel with your peg leg? You could float down from your island off Denmark and then we could choose exactluy the right current to go across to la belle France?

Hopefully, Paul H and Dimitri would be in our "supply boat" it really would be fun. I am nervous of them refusing me because of my great age........I must gather up0 my courage and make the application. !!

Hope it is not as cold with you as it is here.


Christiane
AR80

10/XII/2009 8.30 GMT

Dear Pierce the , Paul H and Dimitri.

Blast, Bother, Idiote, What an ass I am

I replied to your lovely post and althogh I thought I had checked and posted it I had not done this small, but important action.

The gist of it was - I think - that you should float down from Denmark on your "pegleg" and then we could do the Channel swim together finding a nice fast current which would take us directly to Cap Gris Nez with Paul H. and Dimitri in the "supply" boat feeding us the appropriate nutrition when we required it.

There are however so many ships coming down the Channel that I think it is far more likely that one is going to be mown down by a vast tanker than sink "naturally",

Now I AM going to make sure that I post this.

Go well,

Christiane
AlsoRan80

10/XII/2009 8.40 GMT

Well it seems as if I did post it. !!

But it got lost en route. I would hate that to happen to us in our attempt on lA MANCHE

Have a wonderful day.

Christiane
AlsoRan80

10/XII/2009 9.50