h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

There has been a new addition to Brighton's seafront road.

In the last few days five illuminated signs have sprung up that detect your speed, and if it is over the 30mph limit, flashes the speed limit at you along with a picture of a speed camera.

Suffice to say that the signs are illuminated pretty much 24/7 at the moment. Because as is well known, we all drive like nutters in this town

Do they have smileys? I went past one in Inverness and it flashed a at me.

Scunthorpe's 'Traffic Calming Scheme' consisted of a large sign with lots of very small writing on it.

All the drivers slowed down as they went past so they could and read it.

B

What is the purpose of a picture of a speed camera? To let you know they could take your picture if they really wanted to?

In a village that straddles a main road near Dartmouth the council have put up a 'sign' that flashes up your speed to you as you approach. Unfortunately, it's immediately before a sharp S-bend, and drivers are often too busy looking at the display to take the bend properly. Needless to say, the owners of a house aren't too impressed that their wall keeps getting knocked down.

There are two proper Gatso style speed cameras on the seafront as well. They've been there for years, and of course everyone does slow down for them, as to not to is to have £60 extracted from your wallet. But as soon as you've passed over the striation marks in the road, it's foot down and back up to 40-45mph.

PF - don't you just love badly thought out schemes. It reminds me of one that was done in Huddersfield where they made road humps from local millstone grit rather than from tarmac. They were ever so pretty and very effective. That is they were effective right up until the time that road needed resurfacing and six inches of new tarmac was laid down. The net effect was that the top of the humps were now level with the road surface, and they had become rumble strips instead of traffic calming devices, and the speeds went straight back up again

They have some of those ones that flash at you to slow down round here too.

I always think traffic calming is almost a contradiction in terms - the measures they introduce generally irritate me and mean I am more likely to drive badly as I am then driving on adrenalyn.

Glad you acknoledge how you all drive round your was GD * nudge *

We have some good old fasioned speed bumps that they put on this road a couple of years back to 'calm the traffic'.

The cars tend to go faster now, as they seem to either enjoy seeing how fast they can get up to in the gap between bumps, or like to pull the bottom off the car they just stole for a joy ride...

Perhaps one of you people could answer a technical question for me.

When approaching speed bumps who has priority on the clear patch of road in the middle ? Is it the BMW driving at 50 or the white van driving at 40 ?

It's the one with the most dents in their bodywork

* giggles *

I like it when they both think they have and you can watch from the sidelines.

Mind you I am not sure driving down the bit in the middle is any better - you still have to go over a bump and sometimes more so that driving carefully over the one in your own lane.

* all this from someone who choses her routes to try and avoid the 'traffic calming' *

Talking of traffic altercations, I witnessed an interesting fight between an Escort van and a Transit on Friday on the M23.

I was heading up towards Gatwick when these two vehicles shot past me at about 90mph. They were weaving towards one another, if one got ahead it would cut in front and brake.

Then after a while they were side by side again, and they were leaning out of their vehicles shouting and waving their fists at each other.

Finally the passenger in the Transit started throwing stuff out of the window right at the Escort's windscreen. Several toilet rolls, a map and a couple of empty cola cans got thrown. I pulled back a bit at this point, and let them have their fight on their way up to London as I turned off for the airport.

That one sounds as if it was getting out of control!

What were you doing at the airport GD?

They're renovating the office space at the Strategic Health Authority, which is in the next door town of Horley. Therefore all the meetings have been moved just down the road to some business centre at the back end of Gatwick. That's what I was doing at the airport.

And there was me hoping that you had been doing something fun or even better, exciting!

Well given that it is now Sunday afternoon and I'm at home. I couldn't have got too far, or had too much fun if I was flying out of Gatwick to somewhere and back again.

"Finally the passenger in the Transit started throwing stuff out of the window right at the Escort's windscreen. Several toilet rolls, a map and a couple of empty cola cans got thrown."

Ah, fond memories of driving along the A303

GD - you may have been posting from somewhere exotic, or meeting someone, or partying hard - or even plane spotting

* makes sure she is far enought away that GD cant hit her or throw things at her *

Gosho! The A303 was obvoiusly different when you drove it to when I do I am obvoiusly driving it all wrong!

Oh yes, the 303

I remember a time I was happily tonking down the outside lane at about 80mph is a small string of cars, as you do. When suddenly this big beamer appeared behind us and started bullying cars out of his way.

I was having none of it and pulled over before he could have a go at me. The beamer went past me and drove right up behind the black Volvo saloon that has been at the head of the chain of cars. The Volvo pulled over after a few seconds and the beamer went past.

At that moment, the Volvo pulled back out into the outside lane, accelerated up to the back of the BMW, and turned on his 'blues and twos'.

Whoops!

* giggles * I love natural justice but not unmarked police cars!