h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Happy New B'akt'un, everyone! Special greetings to our Mayan readers.

As we all know by now, the Mayan calendar came to an end today, but the world didn't. This statement should not be taken to mean that the world will NOT end at some time or other - merely that the Mayans didn't know any more about it than Harold Camping. Not that the Mayans were claiming the world would end, anyway. They just ran out of paper, or clay, or stone, or whatever, and had something better to do than fill out the almanac any further.

So, back to business as usual - which is when the world will really end.

You see, Jesus explained this:

'As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.'

Matthew 24:37ff

In other words, it's that old math paradox about 'it has to happen when you're not expecting it.' I suspect that's why people are always expecting it - so it won't happen.

Anyway, to celebrate the first day of the rest of your lives, how about a love song to the Earth which failed to blow up today?

Here, for your delectation, is my favourite non-end-of-the-world song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5a_4fBH_7dk

The most moving use of this song, by the way, was by William Prochnau, author of 'Trinity's Child'. In this novel, the world breaks out into nuclear war during the Reagan Administration. (Yeah. We know.) The whole thing is experienced by the crew of a B-52 SAC bomber, who decide, finally, to abandon their mission and refuse to drop their payload.

As the world goes to hell below them, a lone AM station on the US West Coast broadcasts 'If'. And one other song, quite poignant, when you think about it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAsV5-Hv-7U

So today, if you can listen to music, smile. If the sun shines where you are, enjoy the rays. If there are stars, wonder. And maybe, thank whoever you can think of to thank. And be a bit kinder to one another, for the sake of the turning Earth.

Have a good new B'akt'un, folks! God or Quetzalcoatl bless!



PS If you're interested in the book:

http://archive.org/details/trinityschild00proc

Yay! And a wondrous wonderful wonder to you, sir! Splendid piece of writing this! I shall celebrate you. In this moment. Cheers!

Thank you, honey dear.

Wonderful post, indeed. Thanks Dmitri.

And a Happy New B'akt'un to you and the desert goddess.

I have visited several Mayan archaeological sites. I would love to go back. I think I would appreciate them more now than I did then.

Yes. And we thank the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints for their extensive monetary support of Central American archaeology - even while we refuse to accept their explanations for same.

People do often have strange reasons for doing things and even stranger ideas. Well, everyone except thee and me.

Nah. It's just you, Hypatia. I have lots of weird ideas.

Hullo Hyp darling! I love it that I'm still the desert goddess. I must email you. Yes, isn't our Mister Dmitri some splendid writer, , and I think about the Mayans, and Mexico, all the time. Can't believe you've seen the Mayan ruins. I have been to Mexico, one time in '91, but spent all my time thinking I was seeing my imaginary spirit guide sitting beside the pool of a motel where the windows didn't open, but there was an iguana in the carpark.

>>I suspect that's why people are always expecting it - so it won't happen<<

Reminds me of something that Prof. Yeshayahu Leibovitz once said, when asked if he believes that the Messiah will come (a rather complicated issue, in Judaism) : 'I am one of those who believe that the Messiah _will_ come [...] he _will_ come, always. A Messiah that comes is a false Messiah. Every Messiah that comes is a false Messiah, since the very essence of the Messiah is that he _will_ come.'
[Quoted from here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zz-QMDPW5RM , with slightly corrected translation because I disagree with some of the subtitles.]

i.e. believing that something will happen in the future and that thing actually happening are two different things.

He was a clever man, Prof. Leibovitz.

Yes, he is, indeed.

the world can never endor it be spelt "woend"

happy start of the 14th Long Cycle

I'm just waiting for the next doomsayer to start spouting, but if they mention Comet Ison they'll get a and a from me (I've already checked and it's not coming within 64m km of the )

Next!

Comet Ison?? What's Comet Ison? Need info, for to plan future.

woend. Hey Prof.

somebody should read my BATS column in The Post

(heads to GB's BATS column in Post)

(comes back in from Post)

where's the BATS column, the one about Comet Ison?

(heads back out to find Comet Ison in Post universe)

A87774989

(a tip: you could have just searched for Comet ISON in the search engine)

Hot tip:

Click to remove the 'Edited Entries Only' from the search function.

Then type in any column you want from .

Look for the word 'archive'.

Ywesterday on the Discovery Channel was a program about the coming zombie apocalypse. I am not making this up. There are people out there worrying about being bitten or otherwise infected with some super virus that turns them into flesh eating zombies. One woman was nearly in tears stating that she hoped her husband didn't become infected because she'd have to shoot him to protect her children. Oh, if you are threatened by someone who wants to eat your face, you need to shoot them in the head. Only a head shot will stop them.

Years ago the Discovery network of channels and the History network of channels both tried to present educational information. Now they are both farces. Remember when Biography actrually aired biographies of interesting people. Now it's all mobsters and ghosts. And once proud A&E is reduced to reruns of reruns and 'reality' programs.No more original dramas or concerts or ballets. As for the History Channel, forget finding any programs about history that weren't made at least 5 years ago. It's all 'reality' garbage. The Science Channel was full of crap about the imminent apocalypse. Well, all of the channels were. The National Geographic Channel is also basically worthless now. H2, which used to be called History International, is slightly better, but I seldom see anything advertised that isn't a repeat of an old series from the History Channel. They have Ancient Aliens, which is actually entertaining even if it is weak in the believability category. And truthfully, ancient aliens makes more sense than a zombie apocalypse or predicting the end of the world using a calendar that was never intended by its creators to predict anything.

Sorry, Dmitri. Didn't mean to hijack your thread with a rant.