h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh where, oh where has our Gosho gone?
Oh where, oh where can he be?

With his ears cut short,
and his tail cut long.
No, wait, that must be Dewey!

Yeah, Gosho's the one with his hair cut short...

Is it possible to cut nonexistent hair?

Sure....




With imaginary scissors!

Hey GMan!

Fortunately, I have imaginary scissors.

I can't show them to you, though.

You *can't* show me your imaginary scissors? Or you *won't* show me your imaginary scissors?

I'm thinking Gosho's gotten rather imaginary lately ...

I wonder why he's given up on his fan club? Is it because there's over 10,000 posts here? Does he think his fame has gotten out of hand? Will we ever find out the truth?

400 miles is a long way to go to show you
my imaginary scissors, Lady Scott. And it
would be unnecessary to make the trip.
My imaginary scissors look *just like*
your imaginary scissors. So take out your
imaginary scissors and look at them, if
you'd like.

I don't have any imaginary scissors.

I can imagine what that's like...

But I do have virtual scissors!


See?

8<

>8

8<

>8

8<

They can even cut in either direction!

* makes sure there is still plenty of G&T for Gosho and leaves a for his return *

::rearranges the <g&t> in an artful display::

*cuts up*

8< 8< 8<

Hello everybody

I'm very worried about my dad He... I don't know where to begin. I think he first started talking about 'them' a week or two back. First 'they' were in the computer, then they, well, he said they got out and moved into the bathroom so he didn't go in there for a few days (pee-yew). It was a bit unpleaseant

So then 'they' got into the television and he wouldn't watch it any more. That's when he started wearing the thing on his head. He says it stops them reading his brainwaves. Mum wishes he'd take it off because she needs it for straining the pasta.

A couple of days ago they got into the mattress so now he'll only sleep on the floor. Mum's very about that. He tastes all the mail before he opens it and he licks the screen on the computer before he reads the email - he says 'they' might be in there and he can taste them.

Do any of you know who 'they' are? Is it anything to do with Dewey? He even wanted to watch American Idol last week - that means there's *definitely* something wrong with him.

I want my dad back

Maybe Mum should strain the pasta with the thing on Dad's head .. maybe "They" will go away then ...

Maybe Dad needs to take a little vacation in a nice room with mattresses on the floors and walls...