h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

But Ma'am, thats Dr Vibenstein's ball.

~Greebo glances down at the ball beneath her... then up at Menza... ~

Oh...

~She crabs along the grass until she reaches Menza's ball... and settles down to guard both...~

Me has yours and the good doc's balls... ~evil grin~

Very good Ma'am.

*opens mouth to say something, then thinks better of it*

*raises eyebrow and look at EV questioningly*

Carry on.

*gets the camera to take a picture of Greebo with her paws round Menza's and Dr E V's balls.*
Another one for the album I think.

~Greebo poses for the picture... grinning as wide as she knows how... and a paw wrapped around each of the balls...~

*CLICK*
Sorry about the flash.

*Whilst Grebo is temporarily blinded, Menza and Dr E V are able to retrieve their balls.*

Me can't see... ~Greebo blunders into several hoops knocking them down~... ME CAN'T SEE!!!! .... ~Greebo smacks into the wooden post at the end of the game and topples over unconsious~

*Throwing their balls to one side, Menza and Dr E V rush to Greebo's aid. There is still some water left in the holed tank, so they throw it all over Greebo.*

Did somebody ask for a large scotch, in a kilt?
*takes the opportunity that Greebs is unconcious and everyone is distracted to heft his mallet in his right hand (i am righthanded, you know), and continues to knock his ball through the last four hoops. *

*Thinks 'Only got to hit the post in the middle, but Greebo is in the way, poor kitty. can't just go blattering the ball at the post, might hit her too'*
*runs over to see what he can do*

~****** thrashes around~... I am drowning... I am drowning...

~****** jumps to her feet and bursts into song~

Once... more... you open the door...

~****** stops singing~

My head hurts... ~She glances about~... Who are you??? For that matter who am I? Where am I???

~****** flops down to the ground~

I don't feel at all well...

Bable-17 do you have anything in your furry purse that could revive poor Greebo?

Whose Greebo???

*opens sporran and takes out hip flask. pops open the top and trickles some of the 17 year old Laphroaig whisky between Greebo's lips. Greebo swallows. B-17 takes a step back*

I've no idea what this will do to a kitty, I would stand well back if I were you.

~****** swallows the drink... her eyes cross... she starts to jerk spasmodically... wisps of steam appear from her cute furry ears...~

Arghhhhhh... tyuuuuuuuulppp... sssnnaaaaaaarffffleweeee!!!

~****** slowly collapses... and lays in a furry heap... twitching occasionally... drool appears at the side of her half open mouth~

Errrr... and that's supposed to have helped, is it?

It's ok. Just give her a bit of time to let it work right through her system. It's potent stuff, to the uninitiated. Want to try some?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no...... okay then.