h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

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Well, OK, no, perhaps not entirely certain. But definitely lacking the more visible ones in the more usual places...

Apparently, at the premiere of Spiceworld, Scary Spice asked Prince Charles if Prince Albert had a Prince Albert.

I'd like to think so. They are named after him after all.

I'm going for the Prydonian Seal next, left arm though.

A few years back got a red question mark (a la Colin Baker's collar) on the right shoulder but I reacted badly to the red ink & had to get it re-coloured blue.

Slightly annoyingly, people occasionally ask if it's a reference to the Riddler. I'm a Batman fan too but that's not the reason...

Starting to look like a job lot of Prydonian Seals...

No! No! I can't have that! I will NOT have people going around advertising their over-fondness for TV SciFi!

*decides not to get the heroes-style BBC2 logo on face after all*

seeing as how you think it's a bad thing...

that would have been a cool tattoo - but I bet there are zillions of them now

what about a Stargate-SG-1 stylee jaffa tattoo on the forehead?

How can the enduring myth of the sailor being a poof co-exist with the legend of having a girl in every port?

They take it and they put it where ever they can.

And good for them!

Prof Steve Jones was on the radio a while back, trying to explain the concept that dispositions (eg genetic) don't automatically define outcomes, but can be turned on or off depending on environmental conditions. He said,
"For example, the Royal Navy used to have a law that said homosexuality was illegal until you were forty-six days out from port."

After 46 days a man would probably shag a hole in a barber's floor.

A story from Brendan Behan's autobiog:

In the late forties, Dublin was populated by a number of US 'remittance men' with easy access to money and therefore to . One was a former USN sailor who'd been quietly dismissed with a healthy pension after kidding on that he was gay. This gave a visiting British naval officer a cunning plan. On returning to his ship after leave, he went to see his CO.
"Sir," he reported, "I've started to have certain feelings towards my oppo,"
"Oh, I know," the CO told him, "He is rather gorgeous. Just try and be discrete, will you? He's already seeing my XO and I don't want him to get jealous."

That is beautiful.

Yes, very touching.

Tattoos... Where do I start?

I absolutely can't stand them. People I know with them fall into three categories: Morons, my mother* and my girlfriend**.

Morons:
My Uncle has a faded Manyoo crest with two black bars under it - one to cover up each of his ex-wives names.
My cousin has a scribbled-over name of an ex-girlfriend masquerading as a celtic hedge.
My mate Joe (who hates being called Joseph) has the word "JOSEPH" tattooed on his own forearm for all eternity - at least he won't need to change it any time soon.
My policeman mate has the sort of crappy flame decal you see on a 1980s muscle car tattooed on his ankle and up his shin.

All of those people are branded for life with moronic symbols because they thought it was funny at the time. Why would you do such a stupid thing, of your own volition, and pay for it?

*I can't call my own mum a moron.
** See above, only moreso.

Because what falls into moronic or crappy design is somewhat subjective...

the flaming shin sounds rather sexy if done right. I susally find that these things depend a lot on the artist and their relationship to the canvas... Your average joe who wanders in and asks for a huge piece of flash, decided upon at that moment is less likely to get the artists' attention in the same way as someone who has considered and thought about what they want and discussed it with the artist....