h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OK, OK, ignore my 54-40 comment on another thread....but it's not all that funny.

I have always sworn that I would buy a high powered rifle with scope and survival gear if the US ever turned it's jaundiced eye in our direction...

Having hitched across some of this country and gazed with wonder out the window of various means of transportation, I can't see there being enough cinder to make enough cinder blocks for the task.

I had a thought about the canadian border last night. There was an item about a botched ministry of fisheries sting here in NZ.

Something in explanation was understaffing and that there is only one full-time fisheries officer per 1,000km of coastline.

Does Canada have the population to secure it's borders?

Count me in, but no, we ceceded our control back in the 50's I believe. An invasion would walk right over the border and a small military force would just hop in a large RV. All we can do is rely on the kindness of strangers a la Scarlet O'Hara.

What would they want with acres and acres of snow, anyway?

I thought as much. We have 4 million in the space a little bigger than where the UK has 60 million

Sorry Zoomer, but it was Blanche Dubois in Streetcar Named Desire that always relied on the kindness of strangers. And I'll be the one behind you at Canadian tire stocking up on ammo if Uncle Sam ever decides to get grabby in our direction. Short of defoliating and napalming the entire Canadian Shield, and most of BC they just couldn't ever conquer the Great Green North. An air war only works if you can find what you want to bomb.(grimsmiley)

We have 30 million in a space a little bigger than most of the rest of thw world.

Seriously, if the entire American Army, Navy, Air Force and Coast guard came across the border it really wouldn't make much difference. They'd just be swallowed up in the space and be ignored. They wouldn't know what to do. No one would be blowing them up. No one would be colaborating with them. They'd just be ignored like we already ignore each other. And then after a few years of occupation they'd realize that they somehow feel smarter than they ever have before and like it better here and we'd give them citizenship.

Sorry, Rev, simulpost. I think I may have said pretty much the same thing as you.

There is an official Canadian Forces defense plan that responds to an American invasion (which follows the 1812 strategy of splitting Upper and Lower Canada [which I guess is the strategy we expect the Americans to come up with]) by throwing a military Hail Mary straight down the Mississipi valley in the hopes that we surprise the He11 out of them and do lots of unexpected damage until the rest of the world realizes what they should have realized because of the invasion of Iraq and comes to give us help.

Or else the Canadian Government will just ask me to write a sentence at the Americans. That should hold them off for a while.

Sorry, Rev. I rekin I'se not lazy, I'se just tiiiired!

The first mistake the US would make would be invading Ottawa and Toronto. The rest of Canada would just cheer!

And they think there are a lot of places to hide in Iraq! They would never find our Prime Minister, Mr. Trudeau!

Is he the one on the two dollar bill?

And all those heavy water reactors! What Can we du about them? (except maybe export them to every godforsaken third world country that's desperate for dependable power on which to base a stable society.) And all those fields of weaponized roundup ready canola and wheat? And, heck, there are all those chemical plants just a few miles from my place (and in every second valley between here and the border). We're just crawling with WMD programs!

speaking of harbouring and exporting terrorists...
http://www.cbc.ca/stories/2004/02/16/border_explosives040216
somehow I think if she had been the wife of a Canadian soldier heading south she be in Guantanamo by now.

Dude! Our platoons of BC bud smoking boarders stand at the ready with Bongs of Mass Destruction!

"Bongs of Mass Destruction"



And Canadian beer, eh?

I would suggest sikking Marg Delahunty on the Americans....

I like the beer and bongs idea....

We could welcome them heartily with our beer (actually beer, and not bubbly dishwater), while they are still passed out, take compromising photos of them, say, peeing on their flag, and them ship them home.

Do you think Brador could come out of retirement?http://pages.tias.com/9074/PictPage/1922166982.html

Since Molson's is partner with Coors, they could slip Brador into Coors Light cans. The Americans would never know whart hit them! I doubt even the American Malt Liquors would come close to packing the wallop that Brador ever did!

our beer (actually beer:

Still not a patch on white label
a traditional barley wine

mmmmmmmm...Brador


Facism rears its lil'ole head in Texas - thoughtcrime anyone?


Five convicted for considering Bush ranch protest
Associated Press


Five peace activists arrested last year en route to a demonstration outside President Bush's ranch were convicted Monday of violating the city's protest ordinance.

A jury deliberated about 90 minutes before returning the guilty verdicts for the five on the Class C misdemeanor of violating Crawford's parade and procession ordinance.

"It's an overall picture of the complacency of our nation and how the president has this sort of no-protest zone around him at all times," Amanda Jack, 23, of Austin, one of the defendants, said in a story in Tuesday's Waco Tribune-Herald. "It's completely absurd that you can't even get near the peoples' president. You can't even petition your own government representative."

The Crawford ordinance required 15 days' notice and $25 before the chief of police could issue a permit to protest within the city. The rule has since changed to allow for a seven-day notice.

The five, who were given fines ranging from $200 to $500, plan to appeal.

Tricia Major, who was the first of the five arrested, wasn't surprised by the verdict.

"I think that we had a jury of people who live in a small town, so they're going to have to face their neighbors and their public officials and their law enforcement personnel every day," said Major, 43, of Dallas. "We're not the most popular people in this town, and it would take an enormous amount of courage to bring back an innocent verdict."

The attorney for the five said they were not demonstrating at the time of their arrests. They were stopped by a police blockade in May and some had gotten out of their cars to try to negotiate with the officers, according to testimony. Trip organizer Lisa Fithian had testified that some took out their protest signs to show them to the officers.

Tidmore testified that a person wearing political buttons without a permit could violate a city ordinance that requires prior notice before a protest or parade.

$200 to $500 for driving near the ranch with protest signs in the car. I wonder what they would do to me if I showed up with a truck load of horse s hi t and just started flinging it at the ranchhouse by the shovel-load?
I hear its really nice in Guantanamo this time of year.