h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Aha. Moderators have no taste for German poetry, then...

There once was a feller called Mark
He was found to lurk in Hyde park
On nice sunny days
In disorganised ways
In order to make Mina's dog bark.

And now we find ourselves in the home straight,
(For Mark himself though, it's too long to wait)
Just one last month of h2g2 fun
Before Mark heads away into the sun
We could not let this this sad occasion pass
Without a verse or two (although, alas
Few efforts here make mention of dear Peta,
Or use the old iambic pentametre).
Best wishes Mark, with many expectations
For solitary (ulp!) perigrinations.

Mark and h2g2 up a tree
L-E-A-V-I-N-G
?
-MRD

h2g2 - Mark-ed off

h2g2 sale - many entries Mark-ed down....

Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'h2g2 Announcements' to 'Ask the h2g2 Community'.

Genius

Trust the Italics to mis-place a thread <>

Oooh, yes, you can always trust the italics.

Hmmm, are we sure?

Ahhh, but it's only misplacing it if Sam *didn't* mean to put it there

There once was an Editor called Sam
Who started a poetry scam
He posted a thread
In the announcements bed
And was unfairly moderated for spam

In Bush House did Moxon decree
That limerick lines number three
And they did.

Liam.

THERE WAS ONCE A YOUNG MAN NAMED MARK.
WHO WAS EVER SO KEEN FOR A LARK.
HE WENT OUT TO THE PARK, GOT LOST IN THE GREEN.
AND I DONT BELIEVE, HE WAS EVER AGAIN SEEN.

Byeeeeeeeeeee

In WinNT did DNA
A stately Guide-to-all decree
So Jim, the program-giver ran,
Through routines measureless to man
Down to a bugless C
So twice five files of fertile thought
To digital village were soonest wrought
Where blossomed many an incense-bearing tree (I think you know what I'm saying )
And here were jokes as ancient as the hills
Enfolding sunny folks we all envy

But oh! that deep, be-bearded hippy slanted
Off to the right at some artistic angle
Whene'er his name upon the screen is printed
A savage man! so holy and enchanted
From what I hear he makes the ladies tingle...
But in this hippy, ceaseless turmoil seething,
As if the man in fast thick pants (!) were breathing,
A lust for travel momently was forced:
And thus a bombshell of grave news has burst
Researchers come to here record their hail
Or just lament his leaving and here wail:

H.
(I'll come back and finish this at some point, you'll have to excuse me, there's someone at the door...)

The Man From the Porn Shop....

B

Hoovooloo!

It is an ancient Editor
And he stoppeth one of three
"By thy thin black beard and glittering eye
Now wherefore stopp'st thou me?"

He holds him with his skinny hand
"A great website!" quoth he,
"Hold off, unhand me, wisp-beard loon!"
Eftsoons his hand dropt he.

He holds him with his glittering eye
The Researcher stood still
And listens like a three years' child,
The Editor hath his will

"The site was cheered, the cheques were cleared
Merrily did we toil
To build a Guide that all would write,
We burned the midnight oil"

And then the dotcom bubble burst
And royally f****d were we
But still we sailed our chosen course
Thanks to the BBC

At length did come an Albatross
Through the fog it came
"Moderation" it was called
We hailed it in God's name

But now I'm cussed with wander-lust
My desk I'll leave behind
To Africa the road calls me
Off site and out of mind.

O sweeter than the marriage-feast
Tis sweeter far to me
To walk off now into the sun
With goodly company

Farewell, farewell! But this I tell
To thee thou Researcher:
The site's yours now, but this I trow -
Break it and I'll getcher!

With further profuse apologies to yer man Samuel Taylor Coleridge.

H.