h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I recently found out that one girl who turned me down for a date, had a boyfriend at the time. I was not aware of that, makes me feel a bit better.

It´s bad when you´re watching The Big Bang Theory and find yourself wishing you had the success with women that they do.

Ah, but can you sing the theme tune! My son can, and that seems to impress the ladies. Maybe you should try that

Another dead end. I wish women would get to know me before deciding they want nothing to do with me.

Any details you want to share?

Seems like you're about as popular as a visit by the Ton Ton Macoutes

You´re going to be using that phrase all the time now, aren´t you?

Not that much to tell. I got the phone number of a girl at a party a while ago. I called her a while later to ask her out for coffee as we had talked about, but she was just on the way out the door. Now when I call her she just doesn´t pick up.

It's rathernice to dust off an old favourite, the old jokes are always the best.

Now on to the serious stuff. The gentle approach is invariably the best. It's soooo difficult for us chaps to pick the cues and social nuances from the fairer sex. To another female observer is outrageous flirting, is usually completely lost on us blokes. Keep the eye contact, note proximity (Personal space varies from person to person) but if she likes you she will let you a little closer than is normally socially acceptable, KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF! Definately don't maul! Try to notice who keeps eye contact, especially when talking, if it is maintained you're deemed ok. Otherwise move on.

nortirascal: I don't think it's a question of sex. I am technically female and completely oblivious to most social cues. My young gentleman is very, very good at reading them. Don't assume that having boobs makes a person socially ept.

An interesting perspective from one who knows, Runescribe. I merely base my thoughts on my own experiences. You, and your young gentleman (I do envy his talent) are the exception to my knowledge. Thank you for your useful input, I'm sure Xantic will appreciate your perspective in his quest.

Well, I do seem to have encountered some clueless females. Hence why next time I´m going on a date with someone, I´ll give them a paper stating it is a date and written in triplicate.

Well that could be an interesting start tothe evening Do let us know how you get on Who knows? It might even work

...and don't forget the consent form before you have sex. Make sure it's signed and dated.

RF

And witnessed ...

Perhaps it´s time I just threw in the towel and started paying women.

You sound extremely frustrated about it all. I think all singletons get to that point on some occasions.

Not sure whether it's in the backlog but have you asked any friends as to why you're struggling in this area?

Oh dear, putting it down to a purely financial transaction. Not good, I could moralise and pontificate on the abusive aspects of this one, but let he who is without sin cast the first stone, and that certainly ain't me!

Think about all the dangers involved, not just the risk of but disease as well The root of their services are invariably based in funding drug habits.

When I was sad and desperate, I used to hang around the 'sad gits' meals for one aisle in a big supermarket with my bottle of wine in my basket and look lost and forlourne with my microwave meal (aka Potnoodle man). Worked every time for me, some women love to 'mother' you, it's the maternal instinct in them. Once they get chatting to you you're away, they just love to take you home, make sure you have a good meal and with your bottle of wine and some charm and flowers, the rest they say is history

I had some wonderful and long lasting relationships via that route, they were all lovely and I respect them all. Kindness and charm is a two way street.

>>Perhaps it´s time I just threw in the towel and started paying women.<<

Perhaps it is, because that comment clearly demonstrates you're looking for sex, first and foremost. If that's all you're after, trying to build a relationship with someone to get it would be like buying an iPhone so you can use it to check the time. Bound to end in frustration.

You do realise that a girlfriend isn't just a person who will go to bed with you when you want her to, but that there's more involved?