h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have just undergone extreme trauma... it seems that the "List ofg Fun" mailing list has been discussing my sexual habits... MY sexual habits, note... they all know I'm a necrophiliac now, too... , or perhaps on thinking about certain parts...

so how come you mind about them knowing, but not us, eh? My dear ultramarine - I believe you are guilty of double standards here...

Aha... here, I am untraceable; you know me only as Emily Ultramarine, unattached and fancy free. There I am Emily ** (deleted for reasons of privacy), whilst people with whom I am in actual* everyday contact can read about my general activities... double standards maybe, but reasonably understandable, if mercenary, reasons.

*actual, as opposed to real... you know, that whole Catholic/Protestant transubstantiation justification thing...

She did > < > instead of < > <, i.e. instead of

Why did you object to that?
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Nice new monarch Shadow.

Thanks Zorpheus. I like it.
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Because if it's done the wrong way round, the fish doesn't work and it looks crap. , for good measure.

I didn't object to THAT. I objected to the fact that you posted a link to MY PERSONAL SPACE, SAYING "FOR NAUGHTYBITS, GO HERE".

why, aren't your naughty bits accessible, YK?

I most certainly did not!
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I said nothing of the sort. I resent that implication and demand an apology for impuning my good name.
~§~

Now, as to what I TYPED, that's another matter entirely. But I never SAID a word out loud. Besides, that's not what I typed either.
~§~

So.... how do you do fish??

Oh, a wise guy, eh? Nyuck nyuck nyuck nyuck! [deep voice] You leave me with only one choice!

[Close up of YK, who pulls back his fist and thrusts it forward. The entire time, we cannot see said fist. Cut to Shadow. A cream pie hits him square in the face.]

No no no no no, I said fish, not cream pies!!! A plaintive cry, not that it will do me any good

*sigh*

That, Penny, is what is known as a SIMULPOST: two people post in the same forum at more or less the same time. Fish are done like > < > only without the spaces. Pies are done like this. [pies Penny]

*ducks to avoid pies*

Damn, loads of down here!

[throws pies at everyone]

*Emily retrieves a large brown paper bag, out of which she s a quantity of iced buns. She commences to through these at YK*