h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: Plush - A20754443
Author: Matt (Please Sponsor Acetegan U3263512 for Comic Relief) - U168592

A short story for your enjoyment (hopefully)

Again, good work. Made me think of something I thought up a while ago, about how cool it would be (or depressing for any accountants reading this) that if when you died, you got a screen, similar to the ones in Grand Theft Auto and other games, that detail the statistics of your life. It would be worth dying for, just to see it all laid bare.

Time Alive:
Time Spent watching TV:
Bugs killed:
Time spent having sex:
Number of inadvertant heart attacks caused:
Time spent drunk:
Masturbated:
Number of people you have wanted to kill:
etc.

Well, I think it would be a good idea. Maybe I should have a word with the Pope and see if he can sort something out with the old git upstairs.

Creepy. But I think it could be creepier, if the passage from the point where our hero meets the man in the bar to the end was built up more.

I enjoyed reading this and found the narrator a strange, weird man.

I too would have liked the ending built to a crescendo - a little more chiller factor.

I loved the humour which ran through your story.

This is good, Matt.

The narrator a man? I read her as a girl.

I wouldn't write it any colder. The offhandedness sharpens the twist very well just as it is.

(I'm now off to try find the short story it reminds me of. That one has a device like the PS game to counterpoint a murder too, only there it's a piece of music. Know the one I mean? Hammett, possibly?)

Ah, wonderful, I did intend that the gender of the narrator was ambiguous

Hammett? Dunno

Well thank god for ambiguity that's what I say

This has 'wow!' factor. Loved it. The 'plush', and the 'please wait ... loading' ideas are very good -interesting concepts to think about along with the plot.

I took the narrator to be male also. I think it's because I initially took the first sentences to be the narrator's thoughts, not the husband's opinions and it stuck.

It works even better reading it as a girl. I'm hesitating to suggest it might add something to make sure the possibility of the narrator being female is considered at the end... because I was entirely happy with it when I read it. So, dunno.

Thanks Matt, for a read.
Waz

No problem I think I'll leave it as is , because I feel the ambiguity is a sort of hook

as in line and sinker

As in nastiness coming into contact with throats.

Wow. Dark.

Nice

(Isn't it 'till death do us part'?)

And we weren't even engaged Trin!

It was just some random musings one evening. Glad you liked it

Congratulations Matt .

Not just one of May's UG selections, but the QA's gem of the month too. Great piece. You know the drill on polishing. Many thanks for this.

More?

UGeds

More? Look Oliver, I might be able to find something lurking in the back of my recesses. I've actually got a Dr Who Fan Fic I did that I might pop into the AWW. I entered it in a competition but never heard anything since, so might drop it in to see what the AWWers think...

Beware, my first attempt at Fan Fic, so it's not my usual quirky self...

Oh and thanks * at Pin's coments.*