h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Janine] I think you broke him.

[YK] I'm not dead!

[Lizzie] Well what just blew you up??

[YK] Something's just become clear. That Cyris guy was from the Vanda, which is about to try and take over the Galaxy. There are only five weapons that can be used to defeat it: Link's Master Sword, the Wand of Frobozz, the Staff of Destiny, a lightsaber called the Atma Weapon, and a katana called the Masamune. The "jaded" bit I believe refers to an acquaintence of mine called Jade. Also, remember those two twins that the Moogles ran into in the Majic Forest and are taking care of?

[Lizzie] No.

[YK] Well of course not, Lizzie, you weren't there. But anyway, their names are Massa and Meuny. How that helps us, I'm not sure, but it's a start. [to PF] Hey, wasn't Cyris just yelling about you having the Staff of Destiny?

what this thing here? *holds out a staff*

[YK] Well, Pif, the D on the top could be construed as a giveaway ... Er, is it okay if I call you Pif? Sort of a pronounciation of PF ...

*Looks over at Affy who is looking back at him. Affy winks and reaches in a pocket. When no one but GL is looking, Affy pulls his hand a little out of his pocket. The hand is holding a wand. A very Zorkish-looking wand. He slips it back into his pocket before anyone notices. GL winks back. *

[YK] Well, anyway, the Master Sword and the Staff of Destiny we've accounted for, the Masamune we sort of know about, and the amusment I'm sensing in Affy and GL probably indicates that the Wand of Frobozz is right here. That leaves the Atma Weapon. Oh well, I suppose it'll turn up unexpectedly in one of the threads I'm already in.

[Lizzie] Now where were we in my initiation?

.........I knew that......really. Sure call me Pif

We were on your way up the mountain. Once we hit the top, we'll head back down, and we'll have to pick up a Crystal Light before getting all the way to the bottom.

[YK] I thought we already /did/ pick up a Crystal Light. [shrugs] Whatever.

[They start up the mountain. Lizzie uses her new Powers of Darkness to cause the overworld theme from "Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time" to play in the background.]

*Notices Affy muttering under his breath. He looks up at GL and grins. GL wonders what is going on, until a few minutes later he notices that the overworld theme from "Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time" is now playing to a polka beat.*


Please excuse the continuity breach, Affy. I couldn't resist.

Don't worry. I would've done the same thing.

[Lizzie] So what happens next? Anyone got an obstacle we can overcome? Or do I have to come up with it myself?

[Ultros] We're here, too!

[Chupon] Fungahhh!

[YK] Nice. Where were you when we were doing a role call? And when Cyris appeared?

[Ultros] Very safe.

WHAT'S THAT?

*Points to the menacing looking white rabbit that just appeared*

*goes pale.*

Oh dear!

noooooo! please no more rabbits!

[Lizzie, using her Powers of Darkness, changes the background music to a polka battle theme, just to keep Affy happy.]

[YK] Does that help defeat the rabbit?

[No.]

[YK] Darn.

[And stop breaking the fourth wall by talking to the narrator.]


Fourth wall?


[Yeah, it's the barrier between fantasy and reality that prevents fantasy characters from knowing they're fantasy. It also prevents real life characters form caring.]

[Ultros] Should I have Chupon sneeze it off the mountain, or should I have him turn the world upside down a la FF7?