h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

There was a new moon. I awoke and went about my day, as normal. Got Andrew off to school and went to collect my Mother to take her to the Hospice. She told me my sister had visited Dad who was still asleep and she'd gone to work. She asked me to send an email for her and while I was on Dad's computer the phone rang and it was the Hospice, telling her that Dad's condition had deteriorated.
We left immediately and I told Mum to ring my sister to tell her to go straight back to the Hospice. I drove like a bat out of hell, the staff were waiting for us and ushered us straight in, (fire regulations state all visitors have to sign in and sign out), we ran to his room to find three nurses in tears, he had been gone five mintes, at 9.45am. I knew he was gone as soon as I saw him but Mum grabbed one of the nurses' arms and shouted "Has he gone?" and when she nodded, Mum howled.
I put my arms around him and kissed him and he was still warm, it didn't feel real that he was dead.
I went to comfort my mother and seconds later my sister burst into the room, yelling "No, no, no" and threw herself on him, racked with sobs.

The rest of the morning was a blur, I rang the people on my list although I don't remember what I said.

I haven't seen my younger brother cry since he was a little boy, but this tall, fine man wept in my arms.

The Hospice staff brought us a tray of sandwiches and galore, nothing was too much trouble and we were allowed to stay as long as we wanted.

My older daughter arrived at 1.30pm, my poor children have lost two granddads in a year.

I left about 2.20pm, when I kissed Dad for the last time, he was cold. I knew he wasn't there any more, but safe in my heart.

I had a and a with Ron then came home for Andrew, who took the news remarkably well. I knew Allan and Helen were on their way and I collected Allan from the train station at 6pm and took him straight round to Mum's house, while we were there the Undertaker rang to say they had Frank in their safe-keeping which was a relief to my Mother. Then my brother arrived with the Doctor's certificate, which we will take to the Registrar today for a death certificate. Their GP, Paul, has known my parents since he was a small child, he remembers their grocery shop and telling my Dad that he wanted to be a Doctor when he grew up. He spent an hour with my Mother yesterday.

Then my two daughters and niece arrived (my sister had not left my Mother) and there was lots of hugging and kissing and crying. I left with Allan and he's stayed here with us, he's got to go back today though as his boss is on maternity leave and he's "in charge" of the shop...I don't know how he got away, Bless.

While he was watching TV with Andrew I read all my emails, and my journal. I'm amazed and moved by how much my Dad is loved by people here and my Mum is going to be so comforted by all the support. Thank you for the posts and emails, especially those who have left h2g2 but are still lurking. I was incredibly moved to have my whaling entry on the FP and also my latest entry was picked from Peer Review yesterday.

Today there's plenty of running around to keep me busy but I'm going to call into the Hospice http://www.standrewshospice.com/ with a thank you card and cheque in lieu of Christmas presents so someone else can benefit from the wonderful care and support we have received this last fortnight.

Today I am starting a new life without my Dad and I'm going to feel lost for how long I don't know, and I wonder will my broken heart ever mend - but I know where the balm is, it's right here.

Traveller in Time touched
"Let the emptyness of his departure be filled with the warmth you all share.


St Andrews banner: {Making Each Day Count}. They did in a very positive way . "

*wipes away a tear*

As I said in my last e-mail, call and we will all come running.

The end was swift and for that I will be grateful for. Having watched my own father die a few years ago, I know the pain you are all feeling.

Just remember, when ever you feel you can't go on, close your eyes and see him smiling back at you. Look in the mirror and see his reflection in your own face. He is in all of you and will live eternal.

The world of hootoo is with you during this sad time GB.... to you and family from Oz and my family...

You bring back memories of my dad's death last year. It's not something you ever forget, but it's not necessarily a disturbing memory, more a profound, utterly human experience.

As a glistening droplet
Set free from a leaf,
A brief quiet grimace
And then his release.

As the bonds were cut loose
From the web Illness wove,
A great sadness descended
On those whom he loved.

The weight of generations
Took hold of our souls
We were left with a family
No longer all whole.

Eyes closed, mouth open,
Face frozen in time
Now shall we remember
This man in his prime.

Too choked to speak. Can barely see to type. Take care Annie.



Websailor

Oh Annie

It WILL get better, I promise you.

Hope you don't mind my intruding, GB, I just wanted to offer you some support. It will get better.

I'm pretty sure GB won't see you popping in here as an intrusion

That's what I thought.

There are no words, only

GB I read this this morning before work and cried. I really feel for you at the moment, but I promise you in a while you will all celebrate his life, and oh what a life.

My father died when I was 6 years old and I have hardly any memory of him - you and your family have years of love to look back on, and all those memories will help you on the long road of grief. Let the memories keep you warm and do keep talking about him, no matter what he'll remain a big part of your life.