h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

adjecon: Absolutely, we need you, so be welcomed, oh new Spaceport Control Officer!

and Jacculus: I'm sure we need you to run through, stab, hack to death (I'd like that part too ) and impale - the title still needs some touch-up, though, don't you think?

I think Jacculus should be Executioner or Gladiator.

(why we need one on a spaceport I don't know... I'm sure he'll come in handy...)

Hey Alien, sounds like he could be our greeter or ambasador. It certainly seems that he has the right attitude.

Executioner, Gladiator, Greeter, Ambassador... I think they all sound good - perhaps the Executing Ambassador... Oh well, we need Jacculus here to say his opinion...

How about the Welcoming Executioner? Then the focus would be on execution, while imparting a little welcoming influence as well.

OK, great!!

I need an excuse to continue spending time here. What's open for a man of my, er, questionable legal standing and, um, spotted employment record?

You actually want a job?? Do villains have jobs? Do they need excuses to hang around in space stations? OK whatever... You can have any job... (we aren't too strict about employment records and such) It's up to you to decide which one...

Archvillain? Kind of has a powerful ring to it - like Archdeacon, but... more evil.

i'm desperate for a job.....technically i'm a marine biologist but i'll do anything from the grimier to the most grimiest jobs.
death holds no fear......soggy sandwiches do so there i'll have to draw the line!

What about Space Biologist?

Jacculus or me may also have to double as Towel Awareness Officer, as Zem42 seems only to exist IRL.

You think you could handle 2 jobs? That's okay with me... Hopefully Zem42 will turn up though...

Well, technically what a villain has is a "front" rather than a job. Maybe what I really need is a hobby...

Like collecting stamps? *tries to imagine villainous Red collecting stamps and giggles*

I'll pretend I didn't hear that.

~Red actually thought it was quite funny, but he can't be seen laughing at his own expense, that would be out of character~

I'll come back when I know what I want.

Would someone like to do my ironing ????
. . . No, I thought not. Nor do I.

THAT'S IT!!!

The villanous Red could be the Laundry Officer, it would give him complete access to the station, large push around baskets to hide contraband and bodies (take them to the biome, I'm shure the trifid would enjoy a snack) in, and when he feels mischevious he can starch peoples undies.

The perfect front for a villan, just ask Dr. Fu Man Chu.

Hey, I like that!
*imagines Red dressed in white and carrying big baskets full of white shiny laundry*
But I wonder if he does...

Hey everyone - I want a job.

That's about it - any job is fine. Although it
would be cool to have a fun job. There ya go -
any jobs welcome!

Thankyou.

I think I might be a h2g2 EMT, what does everyone think?

Ok and also, I would like to join the vote:

Who shall I be?

Trinity ??
Jeni X ??
Fallen Angel ??
Talitha Cumi ??

Please send an addressed message to:
http://www.h2g2.com/U108443

Thankyou!

Whoever I am (at the moment Trinity!)