h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm a mummy! Elspeth was born on Friday 5 April at 22.44

It's all happen a bit swiftly anda bit surprisingly...

Last Friday (5th) I was having a nic eday building an IKEA bedside table for the baby's room and making a big vat of pasta sauce to stock up the freezer for post-delivery. About 3.30pm I got a bit of indigestion, but thought nothing of it. By 6pm it was really quite gripy, felt like period pains, so I was a little worried. Other half came home at 6.15, we couldn't decide whather to bother the on-call midwives, when I found the tiniest spot of blood. Phoned the midwife, who said it wasn't labour, but best to go to the hospital for assessment. Had a leisurely shower and firend drove us to hospital. They said it wasn't labour either, but hitched me up to a few monitors, and left me alone...

... then my waters broke, and they discovered that I was 3-4cm dilated. Up to a labour room, and after 2 hours on gas and air, the midwife said "Are you gettinbg the urge to push?" "What is she on about?" I thought "It's going to tak eat least six hours before I want to... puuush!" An hour later out she came, three hours or so after arriving at the hospital.

She was over four weeks early, but was a good weight - 6lb 12oz. I hadn't done much reading up on premature babies, because I was so certain I'd be late. I wasn't really aware of the situation, and thought that as she was a good weight, everything would be OK, but the respitory, digestive, temp control etc systems are just not mature, plus the fact that it was such a swift delivery meant that her stomach and lungs still had uterine mucus in them (uck!). A couple of hours after the birth she was admitted to neo-natal as her symptoms were not dying down. Of course they disappeared the moment she was wheeled through the door of the unit, but by then she had been admitted. Many needles, tubes and wires followed - I'm sure you can begin to imagine how distressng that was.

Next morning a horribly brusque nurse tells us that she is going to be tube-fed formula to keep up her blood sugar. No real support or explanation of how this would affect breastfeeding etc. So there we were with another tube. The brutal nurse would just come along and syringe plunge the food into her, with no real acknowledgement of our presence. Other shifts would let us do it, and let the food go down by gravity - more gentle and ultimately more effective, as it didn't come straight back out of her mouth!.

It was hard in neonatal, although you were very much aware that there were babies much more poorly than yours. It was also hard going back to post natal to sleep and eat, when everybody else had a baby with them, and to see mothers who had come in *after* you leaving *before* you. As the days wore on, it became increasingly evident to us and to the staff that there was nothing sufficiently wrong with our baby to require her continued presence in neonatal, but she couldn't be discharged until the test results came back and the registrar approved her release. In fact in the end the registrar let her out a few hours early.

Back in *ordinary* post natal, we thought everything would be rosy, but it wasn't. We had begun to establish breastfeeding despite the tube, but the baby had lost weight - normal in a newborn but the source of extra concern in a premi baby. We were told that a force feeding regime would have to begin again, but this time we were able to get agreement for cup-feeding of expressed breast milk, and to do it (mostly) ourselves - some staff had a nasty habit of just taking over.

We fed the baby morning, noon and night. In addition, she was not allowed to expend any more calories than was absolutely necessary - no washing, no crying if at all possible and no 'messing about' generally. This meant that if she did not latch on to the breast straight away, I was not allowed to proceed with breastfeeding - we couldn't spend hours coaxing her (premi babies are often difficult to feed). Some staff tried forcing her onto the breast, a procedure that we both found very distressing and led to her rejecting the breast entirely. The force-feeding worked - 120 grams (nearly 5 oz) weight gain in 24 hours - but at a psychological price for both of us.

But it was enough to get us discharged, once I had proved that I could express sufficient milk to continue the cup-feeding, and that's where we are now. I'm working with my wonderful, wonderful community midwives to re-establish natural breastfeeding, but it's likely to take weeks rather than days. The feed-express routine (I try to have one feed ahead in the fridge) is exhausting as it takes twice as long, but she is feeding well and currently taking twice the minimum feed required.

I have a beautiful daughter and I'm going to be positive about all this!

Congrats!!!

Sounds like you had an easy birth and a rotten afterwards! Thank god for community midwife teams! Mine were fantastic, so much better than in the hospital.

Wishing you and Cloviskitten Elspeth the very best of everything

You've put your finger on it!

With regards to labour - I've had worse visits to the dentist. They offer you lots of painkillers after the labour (yes I had stirtches - she came out like Superman, and stuck her fist through my perineal wall!) which I didn't really need, but nothing for the psychological trauma...

Wish I had a new car to go with the new baby

Congratulations!

Congrats!

I hope you are able to put the immediate post natal period out of your mind soon and can concentrate on bonding with your little girl.

I had two sons and when my sister in law had a little girl, I was rather envious of the pretty dresses she would be able to buy her.

Unfortunately my niece turned out to be like her aunt and refused to wear them!

Many Congratulations - so pleased you are safely home now with baby Elspeth.

All my best wishes.

Rainbow.

Congratulations! I have just read the story of your birth and the traumatic experiences afterwards, you would think that in neo-natal units especially the staff would be more sensitive to both the baby & the parents needs (on all levels). But it is over now and you and the cloviskitten are probably at home
I wish you all the best happiness
Ellen

Congratulations. We'll be looking forward to her joining our happy Community.

Ah! but will she prefer 'baster or the Goo?

Congraulations Cloviscat!

Thank you all!

yes - we're home. The new (four week old) maternity unit at the all-singin, all-dancing Edinburgh Royal Infirmary boasts internet access at all the beds - even in the labour rooms! But in the way of such things, the system doesn't work - shame - you lot would have helped to keep me sane in that place!

As babies go, there's remarkably little 'goo' with Elspeth, and as she's currently dressed all in white, maybe she'll be an alabaster baby like her mother... has anybody every tried to tie skin preferences into birth signs? I'm Pisces, and I prefer alabaster - what about everybody else?

D'you know, I've missed you guys. It's lovely to be back...

Virgo - Goo, for what it's worth. Vir-goo, even.

Virgo and Alabaster... so much for that theory

Unfortunately I think getting encouraging treatment in hospitals in the UK is fairly random... then again, so are the hours, pay, etc, etc... ah well. Congratulations for getting through it all!...

Lots of interesting parts left to come

Thanks!

My first milestone will be to get new born clothes to fit her instead of bury her....

I love the site of small children swamped in super-big clothes, especially at winter when all you can see is the eyes...adorable.

Congratulations

Oooo, sorry not to be here sooner Congratulations Cloviscat!!! Welcome to the world Elspeth

Don't worry about establishing breastfeeding, I had trouble in the beginning. Dominic wouldn't latch on - and nurses (both brusque and friendly) would try and help me without success (one nurse told me that the best time to express was in the middle of the night as that is when the milk flow is at its peak. I shouldn't have listened, she was only about 19, but I got up! Why? It would have been much better for me to get some sleep.) I carried on cup-feeding (I agree with you, so time consuming!) then I met a magic lady called Elizabeth who was the breastfeeding consultant attached to the hospital. She was brilliant - it turned out that in Dom's case there was a 'docking' problem, he had a receding chin. It took a little while, but before long we did it. When I think back, it's amazing that little teenies can slurp up their milk from a cup - he couldn't do it now - it would slosh *all* over the place. Up the walls, on the floor, in his ears....

and massive congratulations from me! We are all very proud!

congratualations



personally i couldnt do it.

i am terrified beyond words of doctors and hospitals, the experience you had would have sent me running for the hills screaming.

totally admire you for staying sane cloviscat. give the kittne a big kiss from me, she should do fine with such a brave mummy

FABT

Thank you all - you are so very kind!

Today's milestones are:

She has exceed her birthweight! The health visitor came and weighed her. This is great because, at day 11, it means that she is right on target, even for a fiull tewrm baby (they are supposed to regain birth weight by day 10, so should just start to exceed it on day 11). it means that we are getting he right amount of food into her - we can do it!

She has also had a few good gos at feeding naturally - of her own choice, without me coercing her. It makes me much more confident that it *will* happen, just as Anna says....

FABT - next time you go near a health professional, just ask for some Gas&Air - it works wonders!

Hello to everyone who's posted

Congratulations Cloviscat! Flowers for you

Going back to your first posting, and the way you were treated at the hospital. I can understand how horrible it is when you find yourself faced with unsympathetic staff.

My sister had a very difficult birth with her first son, and lost a lot of blood. After a very long labour, and a few epidural top ups, she was sent back to the main ward, and basically left to cope by herself. She was really weak from her blood loss, and tiredness. She had drips in both of her arms, and couldn't even lift her baby out of the crib, and yet when she pressed the 'call nurse' button because her son was crying, and she needed help to pick him up, the midwife who came, told her that she had no right to press that button, as it was for emergencies only! I honestly could not believe how ignorant the staff were to her needs.

When she had her second son, she went to another hospital, again she had similar complications, and lost a lot of blood. Instead of being sent back to the main ward though, she was kept in an observation room on the labour ward for 24 hours, where the staff did their best to help her. They came to check on her frequently, they helped her get her baby out of the cot, and they really seemed to care.

I know that midwives are busy, but a little more compassion would have helped my sister a lot the first time around.
Although her second labour was a lot more traumatic (her boy being 10lb 14oz didn't help ) the thing she remembers the most, is how helpful and friendly all the doctors and midwives were.

I have to say though that all the communtiy midwives are just fantastic! Maybe it's something about being in that one particular hospital that turns them sour?


Have fun and enjoy!


3 Of 8 - currently trying to teach her 4 yr old son not to be so bratty