h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

and people love dancing the reely

Then drink 'till they're squiffy
and float down The Liffey
and that's just a Funeral, well really!!..



We're off to sail the Seven Seas

With a ship full of rum and fleas

Well, the fleas made us itchy,
The rum made us bitchy,

and feeling most ill at ease


The Seas they got rougher and rougher

To chunder was even tougher

When the bits hit the waves

It sent Sharks to their graves

And even the plankton would suffer



My favourite movie this week

Involves the life of a Geek


(Slang - not offensive, describes someone with a fananitcal interest in something)

Played by Will Smith

As a Ghost with a whiff
And a weird maniacle streak



My favourite Hollywood Star...

Whilst leaning all over the bar,
Said, "I'm really tipsy.............

And going on Dipsy


(Dipsomania)

I'll stay put, cos Hollywood is really too far

here's another (no reflexes!!)

A well brought-up lady named Suzy

Never been known to be boozy

discovered Whisky one day
and now all she can say

Is "Want a good time, I'm not choosey"



One day the Laird* shot a Stag



* A Scottish nobleman.

And just as he opened his bag.............