h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, yeah, it seemed it was mostly settled, but I still had to butt in.

Californian beers, yes, can be fair. I had this thing called "Old Rasputin Russian Stout" last night. After having a few Newcastles, it seemed a good idea. Anyway, I read the label idly after having poured it: Alcohol % by volume--8.9%! Anyway, after that I was mainly ready for bed. The connection between this and California beers, of course, being that it was from Northern CA somewhere. Pretty good, too. If you're talking about Sierra Nevada, by the way--overrated, I think, but that's just me. And as a general rule, the US does not make many good beers. There are a few, but for some reason, the truly awful ones have assumed market primacy. I still can't figure out why people would *want* to drink Miller, for instance. I'll try not to go on and on about it, but it's probably just McDonald's syndrome working.

Well, Caffrey's is quite good in London, and the place in San Diego did a fair job with it, but the place I found near my home managed to screw it up somehow. It just wasn't right. Short answer: at some places it will taste good, some not. If you find it, give it a few chances at different places. I was lucky enough to find it first at the place that served it well, then second at the place that didn't, so I had the benefit of experience with it.

I'm being long-winded, aren't I? Isn't it odd how emotional people will get over beer?

You are a beerily enlightened resident of the United States of America - cheers. I don't want to be offensive so I'd rather not talk about watery near beers, and similar mass market substances.

Here in my part of Canada - in Quebec (actually I live just over the border in Ontario where they sell beer and alcohol through the "liquor Control Board of Ontario" - because it should be controlled like everything else in case someone has strange ideas about enjoying themselves - In Quebec you go to the corner store) they have some interesting beers from near Quebec city - My brother can get them in MA so maybe you can in CA. They are brewed by Unibroue in Chambly, Quebec. Some of the brands I can remeber are (this is a problem after drinking a couple):

Maudite (the damned) - about 8% alc. a dark sweeter heavy (huh?) brew.
Fin du Monde (end of the world) - about 9%a bit like a strong Weizen (bavarian wheat beer) with spicy bouquet.
Trois Pistoles (three pistols) - about 9% like a darker version. Nice and malty
Eau Benite (holy water) - about 7%alc. like a spicy Weizen - a fruity taste. The label has a devil with a fake pair of wings and halo, with an "I love Quebec" tatoo - Sitting in a baptismal basin.

They are based on old French/Belgian type recipes for beer. Not just using malt barley but other cereals - to benefit rathr than cheap filler!

Their website is at http://www.unibroue.com/ quite interesting. They have a QT 3d virtual reality thingy of the brewery.

Hmmm, interesting stuff, but the only Canadian stuff we can find around here is Moosehead and Molson, and sometimes Labatt. I have a sneaking suspicion that they're not of the premium line, right?

Being an hour and a half from the Mexican border means we get a *lot* of Mexican beer, some of which is rather good. Pacifico, I've found, is quite good, but it's one of those where after an hour, you realize you've had 8 or 9, and you're blearily looking for more. It's like candy.

I'll have a look around at some of the local stores that tend to carry more imported stuff and report back on my findings. Meantime, I'll stick to Newcastle.

I used to live in Monterrey Mexico - and know the beer well. In fact the brewery there was the first in Mexico and one of the oldest in N. America. The current selection in Mexico is not great - rather like Canada a decade or so ago.This is because (as was in Canada) the business is monopolised by a couple of big companies.In the last half of the century some breweries have collapsed under pressure from competition.

My beer selection in Mexico-

Noche Buena - brewed around Xmas time - a bock.This is very good beer. Especially for the relatively chilly Northern Christmas (a fes days of rain). Brewed by Cuahtemec-Moctezuma
Negra Modelo - Good dark lager. Brewed by Modelo. They have a regular lager which is good too.
Bohemia - a decent lager - it is not quite like a bohemian lager - but it has it's own style.
XX (dos equis) - I think is a fine lager.
Sol - One of many of the light Mexican lagers - My favourite - I think it has a better flavour than similar beers like Corona, Pacifico, and certainly Carta Blanca (the "lowest common denominator" if you like - still a half decent N. American style lager)
Tecate - an easily available and fair lager - similar to a Canadian lager like Molson Ex. They even have Tecate light which is not too bad - better than most of the fair North of the border.

No, the common Canadian beers are not the premium. In the last deceade the brewing industry in Canada has really opened up and there are many smaller breweries making poducts that a beer drinker in England, Germany or Belgium even would approve of

I'm on an ale kick of late, so lagers don't do too much for me. Some of the Mexican stuff is good when a heavy beer just isn't good--hot afternoons, that sort of thing. I've had about half of the ones you mentioned, and all of them except for Noche Buena (nice name, BTW ), which sounds intriguing, are available at virtually any supermarket, so I'll have to shop around.

And I'll have to try and find some better Canadian stuff. I know of a couple good stores for that kind of thing.

Well indeedy, while I have been involved with many of the things mentioned (except caber tossing, for I am a wee lad) a general edification is most definately required. That was a bit wordy
Anyway, I have begun a Scottish Beer page at http://www.h2g2.com/A180046 It is in a bit of a state, and in no way is it complete. But hey, do you now how difficult it is to research beer without waking up in the morning, with nothing in your pockets except a crumpled piece of paper saying, "I am a haddock"
Suggestions for better ways to lay out the guide would be gratefully received.

The guide could be better if long conversation strings could somehow come up quicker, so you could just read the latest ones in a few secs. Some of the older ones are rather like downloading the trailer for Star Wars.

I'll take a look at your page while I drink my McEwan's "Scotch" - It says Malt Liquor cos it got 8.5% alc. It's actually quite good.

I lived in Scotland once (before I was allowed to drink beer, much). But I became a fan of Haggis. The best I had was from Wemys Bay up the coast from Ayr - My Scottish Granny took us on a long train ride up there - to buy the bleeding Haggis. It was worth while I guess as I still remember it.

Mmmmm.....
Maudite. A bit of sediment in every bottle.

Just to let you Non-Canadians know, Labatt's and Molson's are the only cross Canadian Breweries. They're not in Nova Scotia though, where Moosehead is from, as there is a long standing Union negotiation that ensured that the beer sold in each province had to be produced in that provience, or be subject to import pricing. This was to ensure that Breweries had to keep jobs in each provence they sold in. Moosehead, and a few other Nova Scotia Breweries (Keith's , Oland's) were strong enough to keep the big two out.

As for Microbrews, another, if somewhat lighter in flavour, Quebec Brewery is Boreal (they have a styliesed Polar bear in a diamond shaped label) which generally produces nice beer. (I especially like they're Oatmeal Stout).

As I live in Ontario, most of my experience is with beer from said provience (see above, Union stuff), but I heartely recomend Hart Breweries. (out of Carleton Place, Ontario) they seem to be falling by the wayside as of late (in distribution, not quality), which is too bad, because they've made a name for themselves as a Premier Ale brewery (all their beer are Ales, unless Lorne Hart suddenly had an annurism) and Micheal Jackson (the Beer demi-god, not the uber creepy pop-music star) has stated that Hart Amber Ale is the perfect beer to start off an evening, and at one time was actually importing a six pack a week (to england) for personal consumption. I also heartily enjoy Waterloo Dark, by Brick Breweries, out of Waterloo, Ontario. Its a very dark nutmeggy Lager (technically a dopplebock, I believe).
If you just want to get you're feet wet in premium Ontario beer, try Sleeman's beer. They produce light, if not extremely flavourful, but still nice clean brew, in a great bottle (clear glass, with a beaver/maple leaf inlay, and the only lable is around the neck). The other Premium is Upper Canada Brewery (recently bought out by Sleeman's actually, but they promice to uphold the distinctness of the two companies' products) which makes an empressive, and tasty, line of beer. They make the only palatable near-beer I have ever tasted. Near-beer is beer with *almost* no alcohol, usually 0.5% per volume. Their near-beer, called Point Nine, contains 0.9% alcohol per volume. Aperently the extra 0.4% does the trick, becase it tastes like a clean crisp "light" beer. I bought it by accident once, and it took me four to realize I was drinking non-alcoholic beer, only because I wasn't feeling the effects.

Hart is one of my favourites too.. Local boys. I hope they are successful. Another decent brewery in Ontario is Conner's.

Some guy E Swithwick founded a Brewery in Kilkenny, on the site of an old abbey. St. Francis Abbey(ruins ) can be seen form the gates.The brewery produced Swithwicks "ale" a popular drink in the Midlands .
The Smiticks brewery suffered the same fate as many other small independant brewerys in Ireland and was taken over by guinness the plant continued to produce smithwicks as well as budweiser for Ireland . Guinness launch Kilkenny irish beer a few years back which never won over many Ale drinkers in Ireland , but abroad done ok Probally because :
1...lots of people had trouble pronouncing Smithwicks,
2.. Kilkenny Irish beer with a nice logo of the abbey appealed a bit more to the foreign market
3... the taste is a bit more mellow that smithwicks

i just heard a few weeks ago that Diageo are pulling the plug on Kilkenny in the UK as Cafferys is Kicking it ass so to speak
i would be happy to answer any other questions .
Slan,
Keith

Conners was bought by Brick a while back.

I work at the St. Francis Abbey Brewery, Kilkenny, Ireland. This Brewery is 100% owned by Guinness. It was called Smithwick's Brewery up to 3 or 4 years ago. As part of some strategic planning, Guinness Ireland Group (G.I.G.) changed the names of all provincial breweries in Ireland. Kilkenny Beer is a variation of Smithwicks Beer. We produce roughly 1.4 million Hectolitres of Budweiser, Smithwicks and Kilkenny beer each year. Thats 1,400,000,000 pints. By the way, we are the oldest Brewery in Ireland and beer has been produced on this site since 1710. Hope this helps.

Budweiser? (!)

Where I live we don't have Smithwicks. We only have Kilkenny.
Whatever the name, the best place to have one or the other is definitely in Ireland. You can have a Kilkenny in the States or in Canada or wherever you want but it won't have the same taste, I can tell you that much.

Dudemeister: Yeah, Bud gets brewed in Ireland too, but it still tastes as rotten as it does in the US! Well...I think that they both taste icky anyway...but then again, when I was in the states, I drank frikkin' Natty Ice!!! Or Red Dog...Or Milwaulkee(sp?) Best.

They were "great" beers that go down like razor blades...but cheap...oh so cheap!!

I am living in germany now, and so have been touring the irish pubs. There is no kilkenny here...and what is called kilkenny resembles smithwicks, but (in my opinion) tastes like soap has been added...there is this REALLY weird taste from it! But the Guinness is fairly true to form on the taste front, but it tastes...well...it tastes like a liquid! It's not a thick as it is supposed to be! Kinda tastes like it is watered down...but it is 5%, which is stronger than in ireland!

So...I dunno.

But the Weissbier (which is what I drink now...when in rome and all that) is fantastic!

And reports from a friend in the Hague says that Heineken actually tastes nice when drunk in Holland!! Which is a bit of a revelation for me!

I find it difficult to believe that Heineken can taste good *anywhere*.

I like German pils, just as an everyday drink - it is nice and refreshing and pretty much all of it is good (or about the same!).

That Red-beast/animal/mickey/supposed-to-be-Irish-thing stuff gives me wicked farts, as do most US beer-like drinks. Old Milwaukee is sold here and is about the cheapest - However I will pay the extra few cents for the Bitburger or Koenig pils, etc. on the shelf below it. It also does not turn me into a gasworks.

Going to University in Canada - I visited our fraternity chapter at MIT near Boston with my fraternity buddies (we of course were used to drinking Canadian lager like water in those days - which is normal "beer" - 5% alc. and does not ave gobs of additives). There were about 10 of us staying in one room, and I remember all the beer they had on tap (which was rather nice to have available rather than just water) was Michelob - a "premium beer" which means it is supposed to be better than the other stuff.

It was something to drink, but I don't believe you can get drunk on it - so we all probably drank a gallon or two each.

Sleeping in that room overnight, I was glad no-one decided to smoke - a naked flame would have ignited a serious explosion.

People, people. Smithwicks and Kilkenny are two entirely different drinks.

Smithwicks is the traditional Irish Red Ale. It's been around for years, tastes not desperately exciting (Red Diesel, as it's known in Dublin student circles) but you can drink tons of it - it's what we in the trade describe as 'sessionable.'

Kilkenny is a Guinness innovation in the early 90s, primarily for the export market - although you can get it here in the Free State. It's what they call 'hydrogenated ale' - different process, creamier, head, and means it needs to settle like stout. It's for tourists only. It has no legacy, no history - unlike the venerable if dying Smithwick.

Drank ten pints of Kilkenny one night. I've never, ever, ever had a worse hangover.

I hope you had a good time to justify the pain. If you drank 10 pints of the Red-like "beer" over here or 10 or so pints of Michelob, etc. you might get a little tipsy - you might get a hangover - but you would certainly be able to inflate the Goodyear Blimp the next day or at least heat a small building (given some creative plumbing).

First of all, I'd like to say that Kilkenny is not nice beer anyway. I haven't tried it outside Ireland, but in my opinion, and pretty much everyone I know, it's muck. As for Caffreys, I don't know how anyone could even touch that crap. If you want an ale with a "Guinness" head, the only one you should ever drink is Smithwicks with a Guinness head (normal Smithwicks with a dash of Guinness). Not only do you get a pint with a nicer head, but it very slightly changes the taste aswell.

There seems to be a lot of people who don't know what Breo is. It's a terrible attempt by Guinness to appeal to younger people, as stout is not the most popular drink among students. It claims to be white Guinness, but it's just a very strange lager type beer made in a strange way, and is totally undrinkable. Good idea, but bad beer. By the way, it's pronounced "brow".