h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It´s being an issue now in Spain since some politicians wants to make a law to regulate it. They say it is to avoid the abuses of a hidden market on that.

However, many people think that a law helps nothing since it only makes legal a relationship of exploitation. Rich people can buy babies and women in need hire their womb , risk their health...

I´m not sure about it. I don´t like the idea, I think it is exploitation... but, I think of a sister who may want to help her sibling to have a baby...

On the other hand, adoption should be the best choice. One can´t avoid thinking that the insistence on having a baby from "your own flesh" means you are a bit selfish.

In absolutely ideal circumstances I agree with it. I think it's the most selfless and generous thing someone can do for a couple of can have their own gene mix but can't carry the child. (At least, that's my basic understanding of it.)

The problem with it is that it would be very hard to regulate. I vaguely think that in the UK, it can't be done for profit - I think only expenses are allowable. I could be way out on that, however, I know very little about it.

Deb

There are a lot of levels to this process. One is finding a healthy and willing surrogate. Another is quite often the costs of fertilizing process. Then costs to attend to the needs of the "carrier".

And until all the books are closed and you have that stinky little bundle in your own arms - - - you can never know when it might go sour. The surrogate might demand more before relinquishing. Or she may have become very attached to the life that she carried for quite some months, and not willing to give it over.

Some folks, it works out. Others, it doesn't. Perhaps one of the largest gambles that a person could make - because the life of another and new person is up in the air.

I was right it can't be done for profit in the UK, only reasonable expenses. If anyone's interested, this links to the UK governing body. Obviously it'll be different elsewhere.

http://www.hfea.gov.uk/501.html

Deb

I think there are associated issues that might be more easily sorted out if there was a legal framework. Depending on whose egg/sperm used, does the surrogate mother have any rights over the baby eg if she changes her mind.
What if the baby has some abnormality which the would-be parents can't accept?
What if the surrogate develops a health issue as a consequence - any compensation due?

It is a very generous act and I daresay some do it out of altruism, others for financial gain. I can understand the desire to have 'one's own child' although I don't see it as a right.
Ideally, I think adoption should be considered first, given the numbers needing this - but many of those are hard to place & some couples wouldn't be eligible to adopt.

Has anyone suggested surrogate parenthood? They take the child at 13 and give them back when they're 20.

I think that altruism in this case is very rare. A pregnancy is a risk for your health and even for your life.

I can´t help thinking that it is a business. A person with money hires the body and health of a woman who because she is in need of money, accepts to take the risk of a pregnancy.



It is exploitation and frivolity. A person becomes a good that can be bought if you´ve got the money.

Because of my job (Primary teacher) I´ve met many families. Every year I´ve got adopted children in my class.

Anyone can be a biological parent. However, a real, committed responsible parent... that´s quite different. In many occasion the school has to intervene somehow to "save" the child from their apparently normal , heterosexual, middle class parents.

I have a friend who adopted a child when he was 3 years old. He was found in a rubbish landfill. He was a kind of Mowgli. A wild child. My friend and her partner are wonderful people. The child now is a very happy one. Everybody is amazed at the change.

It is more than love what has transformed that little beast into a lovable , healthy child.
A mix of unconditional love, patience, generosity... is what is needed to be a parent.

A wish of perpetuating your genes... that´s not real parenthood.

Sometimes, "time" is of the essence. Finding a willing surrogate may be much less time intensive than fostering or adopting. By wife and I have been registered for fostering AND adoption in three different jurisdictions. We heard nothing at all from one over 5 years, though we called them. The other two only extended us an invitation to initial group meetings after 4 years or more.

We were terribly picky about our desires though. Sound of mind, between 0 and 8 years of age . . . Skin hue, gender, number of limbs, all irrelevant.