h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You're probably familiar with the fool's errand. The daft apprentice in the workplace of yesteryear would be sent on a task to get them out of the way, to confirm their stupidity, and to ridicule them.

Tasks would generally involve them going to the stores and asking for items such as:

a new bubble for a spirit level
a copper magnet
a glass hammer
striped paint
a long weight (the storeman, in on the joke, would keep them waiting there while he did other things)

Now, it may not be ethical in this day and age to send folks on fool's errands, but then the workplace is different - we all use mobile phones, computers and the internet for one thing.

So, how can we update this coming-of-age rite for the modern era? What tasks can we send our office interns to do?

Send the fool out for
bandwidth calipers
A wide format HDMI cable*
an analog cell phone




*Monster Cable, one of those companies that sold $2000 HDMI cables ( http://www.bestbuy.com/site/audioquest-coffee-39-4-hdmi-cable-white/1267764.p?skuId=1267764#tabbed-customerreviews ), actually labeled one of their cables as optimized for wide format TVS. I actually questioned one of the sales staff about this. She seemed nonplussed when I asked if it would make the 1s straighter and the 0s rounder.

Far too many years ago, range markers (a box of) for the RADAR display, the left-handed spanner, left-handed 9 mm rounds for the Browning on the firing range, 3 buckets of steam for the poultry processing plant, galvanized nails for the asphalt shingles on the north side of a roof as opposed to the south, east or west faces . . .

What would today be? A fresh cartridge of emoticons? A package of bold-face paper for the distributed presentation?

Power supply for a cloud computer

Send the fool out to find and interview three people:

A High Church Unitarian
A liberal Republican
An honest politician