h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

TS: I've been living in London for a while, and I'm sure you'll love it here.

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The next bit is for non-Brits only. Brits, I warn you not to read further!

TS, it's not much good trying to avoid all the things people say annoy them about Americans, because they're determined to be annoyed by you anyway, even if you try your best. At the first faint sound of your accent, they'll be on your case. Trust me, I know.

Anything Brits say they don't like about the US, like how they're portrayed in US films, or how they hate our fast food, etc., you will be blamed for personally.

Just ignore them, because they're genuinely oblivious to their double standards and cultural peculiarities. They're quite convinced that all foreigners are, by definition, deficient!

Personally, I suspect they still haven't recovered from the shock of American independence!

And any Brits who have read this far, despite my warning, which is very naughty of you - I'm ranting because it's one of those days when certain people in this 'imperial' bloody English office I work in just can't resist having a go at me and asking me to defend the US just because they've run out of petrol (TS - fuel problem in UK). I mean, how the hell is it my fault!

Sorry, just had to get it out.
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In fairness, TS, although I could rant all day and long into the night, there's some real nice people here in the UK, and they can be really funny and cheerful when they forget to keep their upper lip stiff, and although the UK is REAL SMALL (couldn't resist that one), it's packed full of interesting places and people. A bit like h2g2, really!

And I wouldn't go back home for anything!

OI!! (an aussie call to explain onesself...)

As an indignant Aussie, let's not be TOO stereotypical about Australian behaviour. We have feelings too. Actually we don't really, they have been genetically bred out of us i'm sure

we are not that loud, are we?

i mean really...

gees

One, there are more than English in the UK.
Two, Scots do not all wear kilts, Welsh don't ride around on dragons and the Irish are not fighting all the time.
Three, we have less space and therefore are generally quieter.
Four, Petrol costs around four time than it does in USA
Five, we quite like Americans really, despite what they have done to our language!

But they *have* (along with the Empire) rather helped the language into its current international status, which given the typical English abilities with other languages is no bad thing.

very true about the language, it kind of sucks for the other countries that are all "americanized" now. I know a lot of the people that live here from other countries, like the people at my dad's job from india, say they go back and everything is completely different, it's pretty sad. Thanks for your sympathy trillian, i do plan to get a boyfriend, and i just think the blaming me for everything in the us is funny, it's like how people expect every jew knows each other and all that. I really love to travel (though i regret to say the only other country i have been to is canada(WOO-HOO!)(that would be sarcasm))I plan on emigrating as soon as possible, i don't want to live in the us, but i don't want the language barrier, so....and i like england, or what i know of it. What i know of english humor i love, (monty python, who's line,league of gentlemen- very very strange) i am quiet by nature. The uk is very small, my us history teacher has to-scale maps of europe and america side by side, and california and texas combined is bigger. I am going very long here sorry, i am just trying to answer everything, i am openminded, i really want to know everything! i don't own a jansport rucksack, my dad does though. BUt then again he does not understand fully my horror of being a tourist. I hope i answered everything basically thank you all for answering me
heather

sorry i mean keaori for the sympathy
---heather

Tuna, England is great, even if I do "bitch about it" all the time (I'm learning American). I've never been to the USofA but travelled through Latin America for a year (which is completly different) and met lots of "Citizens of th e United States" there. Most were good fun to travel with but generally tended to SHOUT rather that talk. Was this just the people I met or is it normal for USAmericans to talk louder than they really need to?

"What do the English think of Americans?" - Latin Americans from Mexice to Chile are great, can't really talk about the others.

Sorry, "Mexico".

Americans talk loudly because we're very headstrong as a group. In order to have your opinion heard, it becomes necessary to elevate your voice in big conversation groups, such as a classroom or a party or some such. Sometimes we talk loudly without even realizing we're doing it. And yes, we annoy each other with it just as much as we annoy outsiders.

And that reminds me... different Americans speak louder than others. Hispanics tend to be much more animated and loud than the norm, and blacks can be downright ear-shattering. I recall eating at the cafeteria so many times, and you always knew an entire table had been filled with blacks when you had to shout to be heard by your neighbor. And have you ever seen those stand-up comedy shows where the audiences scream, stand up, wiggle about frantically, and act like they're experiencing an epileptic fit or the second coming or something? What's up with that?

So you get the League of Gentlemen over there then.? I really can't imagine what people must think of it. Even over here, and knowing the (*spookily* accurately done) stereotypes and most of the subtle jokes, it still takes some effort to understand fully, and there are some things that become clearer watching it the second time around. Like a lot of the best comedy, the darkness and intensity does rather make you wonder about the sanity of the performers.

I seem to remember someone saying it was popular in Germany, but it must be hard to dub without losing many of the finer details, and what about the German schoolteacher?.

yeah,we get it on comedy central. It is strange,and very disgusting, but it is hilarious most of the time. I think i would understand it better if i was british, but i get most of it pretty well i think. (i loved the one with the play group at the catholic school doing the it's ok to be gay thing,that was awesome, and the local shop people. Do they even go into the town?) I don't yell as much as my family does (i have 5 brothers and sisters but some are step so they aren't here all the time, but when they are it's crazy) I am used to weird, believe me, my family is so strange. my brother mostly, he just comes up with the weirdest spontaneous stuff, he is so funny though. ok i am shutting up now, but why do you bitch about england, whoever that was i can't remember? if you go to the us, drive across the midwest, go to all the national parks, it'll blow your mind how big and gorgeous it is out there. Like south dakota, you stand on one of the few hills, and as far as you can see (and it is VERY far, it's miles and miles of hayrolls) ok enough of me talking about hayrolls, i am going now, goodbye
heather

L of G? No idea what you're talking about. If you tell me what the German title was maybe I could help out.

It's a *very* dark comedy series (maybe that should be comedy real-life horror drama?) set in a fictitious small town in Northern England.

Most of the main characters (men and women) are played by 3 men who wrote the series along with another writer who doesn't act, so it takes the form of many short pieces with particular sets of characters, carrying on from week to week, but with occasional (often quite scary) interaction between the different character groups, and with several running stories that are deliberately left vague enough to be very disturbing.

Maybe I was misinformed, and it hasn't made it to Germany yet. (One of the threads in the series revolves around a somewhat camp German teacher accompanying a school party who develops a heavy crush on an English schoolboy. I couldn't really say any more on that thread without spoiling the ending for anyone who hasn't seen it yet)

It is very funny, but I can imagine anyone without a sense of black humour could find it rather unpleasant.

For those who haven't seen it, 'somewhat camp' ranks as Traditional British Understatement.

The character in question is a teacher who is of German Nationality, rather than a teacher of German (mein junge).

My favourite is Babs the Taxi driver.

Mark Gatiss, who plays the wife of the Toad fancier (Aunt Viv perhaps?) and a number of speccy blokes amongst others is a mad Dr. Who fan, thus meaning there are a large number of very obscure sci-fi jokes, which is why I like it. Not that I am a Dr. Who fan, no, no way, would I lie to you, Guv'nor
Incidently, the name of the village is Royston Vasey, which I am informed is the real name of Roy "Chubby" Brown, who appears in the second series. Don't know what that has to do with the British liking Americans, but it is the sort of information I absorb like a sponge.

...Straying back onto topic for a moment, pleasepleasePLEASE don't accuse English people of being gross, bloodthirstily-savage barbarians because we hung, drew and quartered William Wallace hundreds of years ago. An American girl I met once accused me of exactly that. She was quite indignant about it, too, so I had to put her in her place and observe that one of our countries still has capital punishment. The other doesn't, and the aforementioned execution being several hundred years previous, my personal involvement was (needless to say) fairly minimal.

Capital punishment if it has been taken off the statute books has been removed quite recently. I think piracy and high treason were two of the last remaining things which could get you hung. Just because it's not there for murder doesn't mean it's totally gone away. Is it still in military law for desertion?

"...its not 'cause they're wicked, or naturally bad; its *knowing they're foreign* that makes them *so* mad!" -Flanders and Swann (with a heavy hint of irony )

Kaeori's absolutely right- we will love to hate you if you're doing touristy things. But, if you get to know us we'll talk about heather, that lovely american girl

Nexus: you've just ruined my image of you as a leather clad rogue!

oh, and a link you may find useful: http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/ -uk slang.