h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Tip taxi drivers really well, and they will show you or tell you anything you want to see or know about.
They are the fountain of all knowledge. (Make sure you get a licensed one. Unlicensed drivers know sod all about the area they work in.)

Are you a licensed Taxi driver by any chance?

If you are above 18 you will be able to go to the pub Or even if you look like you are above 18
BCNU - Crescent

And occasionally even if you don't...

But beware!!
A lot of pubs will ask you to 'prove' your age....

eg Passport!!
'G'

I only got jarred for ID once, six months after I had turned 18.....
BCNU - Crescent

I was only asked once for ID, at the tender age of 22! I think the bouncer must have been bored or something.

I think the sales of alcohol are even more strictly controlled in the States (I think. I'm probably about the only person left on this side of the Atlantic who hasn't crossed it yet). So that won't be new to una sandwich But I'm pretty sure that when I was a kid you were allowed into a pub at 16, but just weren't allowed to buy or drink alcohol . I may be confusing it with the German laws.

What I do think is wrong is that small children can go into pubs these days. For God's sake, this is where we go to get away from the little brats - is there no privacy? I can appreciate small children crying and running around in church, provided the minister is not put out by them and keeps making comments, but where I really freak out is when small kids are taken along to classical concerts. In fact, I have vowed never to go to a classical concert again. Even if there aren't screaming babies there, there's someone coughing.

*Looks round, looks emarrassed, dries up.....*

Sorry, went off at a tangent on one of my pet moans in a totally unsuitable place.

Back to Americans in Britain. Where were we?

Tuna sandwich. A suggestion. Find out before you come from your favourite organisation back home where you can contact people with similar interests. This will make you friends immediately. If you are a churchgoer, you can look up the local equivalent when you come over. If you are an active Girl Scout, there is bound to be a Company in the town you move to. etc., etc. Failing that, join an evening class in something like volleyball or badminton. Maybe they even offer something which explains cricket, so you can really show off (when you get the chance!!)

And one word which will confuse you is "subway". I remember giggling at some American girls who gaily followed a sign saying this in London, convinced they would catch an underground train there! We left them to their plight, rotten kids like we were in those days.

Subway means a passageway under a busy road (for example) so that you can walk unhindered from A to B underground. If you are in London and need a train, don't go down any hole which does not have the London Transport Logo on it. Red circle with blue line through it. The trains are called tubes, and I think the official name for the whole network is the London Underground.

thank you all for your helpfulness. I didn't think i was shouting, what exactly do you mean? I don't mean to sound like a teenybopper or something if that's what you mean, i am not. I am making a conscious effort to stop saying "like" by college (i am a junior in highschool-im 15 years old) I know i can't say to anyone that i like their accent because that is incredibly stupid, i just couldn't help saying it once. THe only alcohol i like is mike's hard lemonade(and i'd rather just have regular lemonade), i'm sorry it just tastes disgusting to me. I get very confused about the country name thing, scotland and wales have their own governments, but they are controlled by britain, or something, is that it? and is there a difference between britain and great britain or is it just for short? i know, i HATE tourists, and i hate myself when i am one, that's why i want to live in the uk, not just visit.
thank you- heather
ps- what are the equivilants for soda,faucet, etc?

if we told you what the words are then it wouldn't be half as much fun as finding out yourself

Yes, I am a licensed taxi driver.
Did it show?

It would be best to leave your gun at home, that's my advice.

But what if I have to use public transport, Gasho?

Learn Karate Minxster

You still don't need a gun even on public transport. The use of public transport is far more widespread in europe than the US so it's not just those who might be described as undesirables using it.

Mina, yes it did show The other is see if you can find a friendly bus conductor and ask them about the route - don't try this during the rush hour though.

Oh, I was rather cruel, wasn't I?
Interesting that anyone should decide at the age of 15 that, given half a chance, they're going to emigrate, though.

Tell me, you do have a Jansport rucksack, don't you?

In answer to questions, the actual name of this land is the 'United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland'
Soda is 'fizzy drink'
Faucet is 'tap'

(Where did the word faucet come from anyway, I'm sure it' not one of ours?)

I believe the word "faucet" comes from the name of actress Farrah Fawcett, who had to be poured into her jeans for every episode of "Charlie's Angels." Or maybe not...

All the tourism information they're giving you is not just applicable to the UK. Basically, anywhere you travel, there are right ways and wrong ways to be. Doing cheesy touristy things is definitely not smart... besides, what's so fun about climbing a crumbling old building, anyway? Mingling with the people and just getting to know them is smart, especially if you take time to compliment their people on things they do better than we do in the US... and if you're not a total closed-minded jerk, they'll be leaping out at you (except anywhere with French people ) from every direction, from little things like the cleanliness of the streets or the taste of their beer to big things like architecture or human behavior. Learn how to get around, and learn where the people go. How, you ask? Go into the nearest restaurant. Order a lot of food, and some alcohol. Chat up the waitress, and be very nice and firendly about it. She'll give you all the direction you need to get yourself started. Of course, if she hates you, you'll end up in the red light district with a sign on your back that says "rob me." So you'd better be nice.

And a personal observation from one who has traveled... if the Americans are loud, the Aussies are louder.

With reagrd to the loud/quiet thing: I think it's partly to do with the fact that we tend to have grown up in much smaller, often terraced or semi-detached houses: you have to be quiet to live together in those conditions! But mostly it's part of that British reserve that the Americans make so much of (if you think we're reserved, try dealing with some German visitors!). Our trained inclination is to go about our business without affecting those around us if possible: we tend to talk quietly on buses, whisper in shops and murmur in restaurants. It's generally not 'done' for customers and shop-keepers to say 'hi' when a customer walks in. (When an American customer says 'Hi, how are you' you often see shop-keepers paralised with uncertainty about how to answer.
This is all gross generalisation, of course, and should be treated as such, but is based on 10 years of working solely in the tourist industry.

With regards to GB/UK etc: this is a good article on the subject:
http://www.quinion.com/words/articles/gb.htm

And if you see a sign that says "Out to lunch", it means something totally different in the UK.

'G'

Chewing gum is common in the UK, but much less likely to be acceptable in professional situations (eg at work, college tutorials, mneeting friends' folks)
Watch for the whole rubber/eraser thing as well