h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have a B I G s****y problem.
every time I wash down my kaka, it pops up back straight where it floated before.
I can't host, I can't stay at home, I can't leave my cat at home,
it's a mass...
I know this subject is not so delightful, but please
H E L P!
help me find a way to make it dissappear.

Try using a bog brush to push it round the U bend. It can't come back then!!
'G'

Eat less fibre and keep the toilet lid down when your cat's at home alone

The only ones I know of that won't go down are the small hard floating ones. The large soft floating ones are usually big and bulky enough to be pushed down by the force of the flush. Try drinking more (water, not alcohol); this helps make them softer. The problem may also be not enough fibre, rather than too much.

Richard says he read an article in the Sunday Times some years ago, all about what you could tell about your health by looking down the pan at your s**t. It even had photos. I almost wish he'd kept it. It might have been useful to solve your problem.