h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Posted for Blickybadger who's having porbs with his firewall (oooer ):

Im the head coach and some of the other coaches and I are taking some of our new mud cult members (rugby players) away for a few days bonding/reward. How can I punish and build character (ritually humiliate) any players who become unruly and do not "respect my authority" whilst away?

I normally use alcohol as a punishment/medium for brainwashing but as these players are all under 16 I cant. What evil things can I do them that :-

A. wont land me in the dock.

B. are easily acheivalble on a tight budget.

one club, one rule, one coach

Refuse to read them their bed-time stories.

Take away their iPod/mobile phone/Gameboy

Make them drink vindaloo sauce down in one.

This sort of thing was traditional when I used to scrum down

You could make them perform a service for the other team members, like make the beds or clean the bathroom, sweep the floor, etc. Or you could shave bits of their head (check on that carefully, though. Here in the US you'd probably be sued.) Or you could make them do something ridiculous in public. If all else fails, there's always good ol' Chinese water torture.

Head or eyebrow shaving (preferably only one of them) is also a traditional rugby pursuit

You usually wait until they are ina drunken stupor and/or asleep though

and you dnt necessariy have to shave.

the mens team at my uni immaxed one of the lads head whilst he was asleep on the way to our tour in which we never played a game!

(im on the womens team!)

a couple of useful I deas and a few people who didnt read that they are too young for

Got some hot pepper sauce and the extra chores bit sounds good too.

Sorry Blicky, I was just explaining the rugby traditiion to MoG there, she seemed worried that head shaving might be problem I wasn't advocating boozing.
When I played rugby at that age I never saw any of the aftermath revelry actually, that only started when I got to Uni

Print up a "I am a w*nker" T shirt and make the one requiring discipline wear it. Kind of like a dunce cap for the 00's

As they are all teenage boys the *Im W****r Tshirt is probabaly totally redundant.

rainbow>

now theres a paradox if ever I heard one

ok how about 'I play rugby like a girl', 'I smell' or 'IDIOT' or some other, more suitable slogan, the point would be to make them afraid of being singled out and wearing the tshirt and being laughed at by the others. Hell even a garish pink t-shirt with no slogan would probably do the trick. Who wants to go rugby training with their mates wearing a tight pink tee shirt. The threat of the thought of i would kep em in line.

Still cant do that, pink is this years in colour for young fashions. Never thought Id see it but it is.

Plus I dont want to get into the whle name calling thing, (no really) in RL Im careful not to label people because of their lack of abilities. Plus I play like a girl is strictly off the Agenda. When Im introducing people to coaching or working with kids I warn people not to use such phrases as it indicates girls dont have lesser right respect and less abilities within sport.

>Plus I dont want to get into the whle name calling thing, (no really) in RL Im careful not to label people because of their lack of abilities. Plus I play like a girl is strictly off the Agenda. When Im introducing people to coaching or working with kids I warn people not to use such phrases as it indicates girls dont have lesser right respect and less abilities within sport.<

What about making them do a random act of kindness for a total stranger? It's not humiliating, but if people aren't used to it it'll make 'em nervous. It's not a bad thing to learn how to do, either.

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so you want 'politically correct ritual humiliation'

How about limiting the amount of lentils they get in their soup at mealtimes?

The t-shirt idea is not meant on a deep level, and I doubt it would be taken on a deep level, I think a t-shirt with the slogan 'I play like a girl' or 'I play with funny shaped balls' would be taken at a light heated lets all point at him and laugh level, it would just be embarrasing for the culprit to wear, not mean that they were endorsing a viewpoint about women's sporting ability or stating a genuine appraisal of their own ability. Plus it would not be detrimental to the boy wearing the t-shirt, no-ones laughing a him, they are laughing at what he is being made to do. The moment the t shirt is removed, the 'punishment' is over.

Me personally, I just can't equate how making a teenage boy drink 'hot sauce' down as punishment is somehow seen as being a good acceptable idea but making him wear an item of clothing that would cause temporary ridicule is unacceptable.

And as for pink being fashionable, so are patrick cox shoes, but it doesnt mean you'd be happy to wear them on a rugby pitch.

Whatever. Good luck with the coaching and with whatever discipline you dole out either way

Apparantly beating someone with wire coathangers leaves no mark, well according to Crawford Until later....
BCNU - Crescent