h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My mom's number was very similar to the local pizza place, and she got frequent misdials. One day I was there and answered the phone for her, and it was a pizza customer. I very kindly took his order.

My number is unlisted, and that doesn't stop the telemarketers. The phone company sells listed and unlisted numbers. You'd think I'd be more sympathetic, since my first real job was telemarketing (a thoroughly horrible experience), but I'm their worst nightmare. I hang up on them instantly, which was always the thing that annoyed me most as a caller. The ones that call me a couple more times, even though I've hung up on them already, I rip into. You'd think they'd have the sense to line me out when I hung up the first time.

The local newspaper is the worst. They call me several times every few months, even though I've repeatedly told them not to. We've got a law in the books here that defines repeated telemarketing attempts, after being told not to call anymore, as harassment, and the victim can take the company to civil court and receive $500 per incident. Last time I talked to them, I invoked this law, and told them that I am now logging these calls, and when the total becomes worth my effort, I'll cash in.

No calls so far, so maybe this threat had its desired intent.

I've just joined the TPS(Telephone Preference Service) http://www.tpsonline.org.uk/tpsr/html/default.asp in the hopes that I'll get less telesales from people who I haven't given my number to.

Incog.

You ever get those wrong numbers when they are the one who's dialed the wrong number but are angry with YOU? What do they expect me to do? Not answer the phone?

Yep, I got someone very very angry phoning us late one night. He said he had dialed 1471 and got our number from it. He was phoning us to shout at us for allegedly phoning him a few minutes beforehand. Funny thing was we hadn't phoned anyone at all that evening. I told him that "I hoped his evening would improve". Funny old world.

When I moved to London in the eighties I shared a flat with a male friend. We'd only just moved in when some bloke rang up asking for Sarah. "There's no Sarah here". He obviously didn't believe me because he kept ringing up for the next three months. She must either have made a number up just to give him the brush-off or she was a previous occupant. Either way she must have been an exceptional lady because this guy just didn't want to take no for an answer.

The difference between my number and the local taxi firm is one digit...

Three O'clock in the morning is not the best time to be woken with a wrong number. I've now taken to turning the ringer volume right down and letting the answer machine handle it.

That's fine if I remember to turn the volume up in the morning, worse still is when I'm out at Three O'clock in the morning and I ring for a cab and... (should I admit this?)...I get my answering machine

I was given Ricky Gervais's mobile number at the weekend...

And I thought he was straight!

Fnaar Fnaar

Will you be contacting him?
(what on earth would you *say*, come to that? Order a pizza, or ask to book his managerial skills?)

Maybe in the US you get less guarantee from ex-directory... I have only taken one telesales call, from a glazing company. I thanked them for their concern, but assured them our windows were working perfectly, ta.

Im still working on that one...

I read a news article recently that the US government is in the process of creating something like this ex-directory you're talking about. And as you would expect, the telemarketers are furious. "We employ millions of people,"... yeah, at minimum wage.

Unfortunately, phone lists in the US are acquired from companies who have a valid reason for having your telephone number... like your credit card company. They sell lists of phone numbers to telemarketing agencies to be targetted for sales pitches.

Yuck.

I couldn't tell you details about phone number information here (they'll break my legs if I do...) but it was hell trying to inform everyone of our new number.