h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I know, I thought he'd left the room with it, even though he clearly hadn't.


* MaW continues in the new direction, which just happens to be right towards Zero *

[MaW] Yes, as I said, this way!

[Zero] .....

[YC] Okay, there's bound to be some sort of secret exit around here someplace ...

[Zero] Why wait?

[He slices through a wall with the Z-saber, revealling another passage with a sign on it that says, "Exit".]

Oh. So now no one cares that I've been gone for four days, or that bad stuff has happened, or... Blah. You just go and replace me with another charater. I see how it is. *is honestly feeling rarther bitter*

Uh, Jade? Just because we didn't mention your apparent absence doesn't mean that we don't want you. We just feel that life goes on, and since we aren't as close to the site of the attack as you are, we don't REALLY know how bad it is. I really think you ought to take this (the forum, I meant) a little bit more lightly.

Come on, let's get some and love here, people!

Try telling that to Dr. Wily!



Will you shut up for once!


[Oh, come on, you two, let's not bicker for once!]


Shut up!

Bicker? BICKER?
I don't bicker. 19 is far too old for that kind of thing.

No, really, it is.

No, really.

Really.

Yes, really.

[Zero] Let's get ON with it!!

[MaW] You said it, Zero.

[MaW] You said it, Zero.

[They go through the passageway. It leads to -- you guessed it -- another large chamber, occupied by Bass. Treble is with him.]

[YC] Might I say, "Here we go again"?

[Bass] This time, you won't walk away from this one!

[YQ] Oh, please. Are we going to have a repeat of the previous battle, only with Zero here as well?

[Bass] Uh, no. You'll have one less target. Come, Treble!

[Treble leaps into the air and onto Bass's back. There's a huge flash of light, and when it subsides, the "wings" on Bass's helmet have turned purple, and he has real wings on his back.]

[Zero] Wait a minute ... if he merged with a /dog/, why'd he get /wings/??

[YC] Are you one of SpoonyBard's characters-who-try-to-find-logic-in-everything-including-comedy-and-console-RPGs??

[Zero] Yes, as a matter of fact, I am! Don't you read Online Life??

[YC] That's someone who's /screen name/ is Zero! Like someone called Sephiroth5 wouldn't really be /the/ Sephiroth.

[Zero] [sweatdrop] Oh...

[YQ] You know, there actually /is/ someone whose screen name is Sephiroth5.

[Bass] Are you gonna fight me or not??

[YC] Oh yeah.

[Begin battle with Bass, who still has his own battle theme. In fact, it's the best music in Mega Man 7.]

Life goes on, huh? Try living here.

Jade: *to MaW* Is it just me, or do they talk too much. You know X-slash?

[YC] Wait! I just figured out --!

[YQ] Me too--!

[[Antipode Also]]

[YC and YQ use Firaga and Ice3, respectively. This is what Bass then gets hit by.]

[Bass] ACK! O_o What was THAT!?

[YQ] "Antipode Also".

[Zero attacks using his Z-Saber. The lightsaber thing I mentioned earlier.]

* MaW considers for a moment *

[MaW] Yes, they talk too much. However, it's a refreshing change, as I think you'll find most of the rest of the people in the world don't talk enough.

* MaW casts Confusion: Bass *

Jade: How true, how true... *she slashes at BASS with her pinkusaber*
[[98 HP taken from BASS]]

Thras: *more to himself than anyone* I know X-slash... *dragon frown*

[Striking Bass negated the "confusion" status ailment, but he managed to hit himself in between.]

[Bass] Ack! Urgh ... Who do I wanna hit more? Oh, and by the way ... look here!

[He raises his Buster Cannon, revealing that two Materia orbs are embedded into the side. Short pause.]

[YC] So?

[Bass] This is Materia. Don't you know what that is??

[YC] You're a robot. Robots can't have magic. You don't have the life force of an ant. And Reploids barely have enough to cast "Mild Sparkle."

[YQ] Well, actually, Reploids do indeed have just enough life force to cast some spells, and knowing Dr. Wily's complete lack of discernible ethics, it's entirely likely that ...

[[Fire]]

[Bass roasts YQ for making him listen to that.]

[YQ] Yeah, that kind of thing!

* MaW flicks a hand negligently at YQ. The fire goes out. *

[MaW] That was really unpleasant, Bass. Would you care to try that on me?

* he says that last in a taunting tone of voice *

[MaW] I'm ready. Whether you're ready or not is a completely different matter, but I'd make my peace with the Universe first, if I were you.

* he smiles nastily *

[YQ] Actually, MaW, you wanted his blood, but since he doesn't have any, you can just teleport his main power generator out of his body, and maybe into your hand (it's about as big as my fist), thus giving you the next best thing.

[Bass] You wouldn't dare ...

[YC] You'd be surprised at the things /he'd/ dare.

[MaW] YQ, that's an uncommonly good idea. Thank you.

* he holds out a hand and casts the spell to teleport Bass' main power generator into it *

[In one swift motion, Bass separates from Treble and collapses in a heap on the floor. Treble teleports away, and a duplicate of Bass teleports in with a look of stupidity on its face. No, that's misleading: it implies that it has a mind to which the term "stupidity" can be applied.]

[YQ] ...?

[YC] Must be one of his "backup bodies". If Bass gets destroyed, he transmits his mind to a backup, which takes it from where he left off. Kinda like losing a life in a video game.

[YQ] Of course, Bass isn't destroyed, so this thing didn't get his mind. Say ... why don't we do some research afterwards?

[Backup Bass] .....

[YQ] Hey, you! Pick up that robot! [points at Bass.]

[The "backup body" picks up Bass, the same blank, mindless look on its face. Bass remains inoperative.]

[YC] So, let's go now.