h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Never ever mention the temprature or the nature of the current wether, especaily to somone who works in a office all day and never seees the light of day exept to curse (cuss) it when he/she gets up. On a first date, this is however apprent that at some point during a first date that you mention the wether metion somthing to do with the clouds, not the actual wether itself. I have lernt this the very long and ardous way.
One more thing, never ever tell your partner that you play role play games until at least the third date (unless they mention it first).

It's best not to say anything overly bizarre about yourself... unless they're weirder than you! Examples of such things are:

Odd fetishes/sexual tastes
Morris dancing
Trekkism (not that I have anything at all against trekkies, it's just not considered sexy)
Train spotting
An excessive enjoyment of anything considered strangely intellectual (ie. my own enjoyment of maths)
Any completely random useless facts (ie. did you know that 2 million tonnes of spam were consumed by tree surgeons in 1961?)
Bad jokes... ie the one about getting two whales in a mini and the one about the silent p in the word "asymptote"
Any erm... *anatomical* statistics!

I suppose the rule about not mentioning that you're a trekkie may be ignored at a trekkie convention

Any obsessive hobby is best not mentioned, anyways. Please do not say you write fanfics, by the way - it's just not very sexy.

why "cheese"?

i don't know... i guess cheese is just a very unspectacular substance!

It also makes your breath smell and may give you wind... sorry to be graphic, but that's how it is!

"the one about the silent p in the word "asymptote""
which one would that be?

That's my maths teacher's favourite joke... methinks he most probably made it up. Anyway, if anyone wants to be able to spell (or even mentions) the word asymptote, he points out that it has a silent p, as in swimming pool! (which often leaves people thinking "huh?!") but never mind!

What you should never do is fake a laugth. Ever, it just sounds stupid.

I told tho one about the two dyslexic skiers once - not very PC, and the date didn't get it, but we were together for a month after that, so it's not necesarily fatal.

I know this is WAY off topic, but can anyone tell me why I have eyes looking left befor my own name in my own posts?

Huh?

Maths people. Competely humour-free!

The eyes show who is online (worked out by how long since last posted)

just becuse you don't understand maths is no reason why it should not be funny. IE
ƒ[x, -x} xe^(x-ukx^3x)^2 dx is hellerous if you are a maths person.
Bur if your not then no, its about as funny as a lead brick and about as conversational.

Okay, I'll ask a MathMo then shall I?

Maths people are WONDEROUS! I love maths and all it stands for. People seem to find all sorts of intellectual people boring, but methinks the sporty people are the boringest.

Sport people are indeed a bit boring, but so are all fanatics, aren't they. The most interesting people usually have a wide array of hobbies and things they do. Sporty peopleare only interesting for other sporty people, I suppose. They can be sporty together, unless they shoot too many steroids, in which case they can only sort of sit around each other and show off their muscles, because sex is out of the question!

All fanatics are boring (when they start talking about their subject) unless you too are interested.

All the sporty people I know seem really arrogant, try to act in the conventional way seen by normal people as "cool" and aren't very tolerent of eccentric ppl like little me! As a result, my little tribe of insanity finds them rather intimidating. Or maybe that's just the Truro School rugby team. You can't really judge people by their interests, but methinks the most fascinating r usually arty, mathematical and (surprise)computer-room-lurking individuals. The least interesting are certainly chemistry students(sorry) and rugby players. But hey there are always exceptions. Oh, and as far as arty ppl go, guitarists always RULE! They're a truly intriguing species!

I am partial chem student, but also currently lurking in computer room.
verdict?