h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yeah

I'm going to eat tinned spaghetti in a minute.

Lucky you, I had a salad

Came from a supermarket and it wasn't too bad

Mine came from a tin, and was past it's sell-by date.

The sauce was a bit watery, but it tasted alright.

hi where do i go 2 report for duitey

Signing in room

Watcha need her for Terran? Nudge nudge, wink wink...

*polishes the old furniture*

*stomps on a patch of floor that looks newer than the rest*

"Hi, I'm Thornthedruidguy,- hailing from the , very far off place of... somewhere-elsia...
and," ( now I remember) "I'm a visiting /... who just happened to stop by because I waanted to say hi."
*Says 'hi'.*

*For diplomacy, perhaps?*
<- Leaves everyone but to guess as to why he has done that (actually it's to be more enigmatic like this) : "..."
(, blew my cover. Oops!)

Oh boy I can't wait until RSM Excelsior gets his hands on you

*Walks through the Great Hall with a sense of humility, and respect for the storied past of the land*

Dear sir,

I have been a member of the terranic army that defends this land for over two years. I would like to not only become a citizen, but find a new way to serve the people of this land. Because all of the bases are connected by waterways, could I start a Terranic Armed Naval Force? Our purpose will be to aid in battle, and police our waterways. Not to mention the advancement of nautical science here.
I used to, and hopefully still will work in the research and develoopment department of the Assassins Guild. From this experience, I have learned much about weapons development and production. I also work for the thieves guild. This could serve productive in dealing with pirates. We could have a department for piracy that will help fill our coffers. This in turn could bring in revenue and keep our costs down.
I hope you take time to consider my humble request. I will do whatever is asked of me, I only figured this a good idea, beneficial to the people of Terrania, those people I have sworn to protect.

Thank you,
Yossarian, Corporal of JG3, Terranic Army.

:an ossified pair of false teeth chatter slightly:

Blimey FWT they're certainly crawling out of the Terranic woodwork lately, how the are you