h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

* Odo mutters again and the Seal's power is used to jam the circuits of the machines. *

Who said there was no use for magic on the field ?

* turns to supervise the loading of the catapults while stuffing ears with cotton wool to avoid the whining sound of self-destructing mechanisms from enemy lines. *

*spook uses some secret dark magic to bring the ghosts of the people who are dead and are now zombies, to earth, to fight the zombies. the ghosts zoom around the zombies confusing them and taking up their attention. while the zombies are distracted spook gets in one of the terranic armies special tanks and rolls over the battlefield. spook fires a rocket at the nearest super large zombie and the zombie is disintegrated in the enormous explosion.*

u zombies are no match for the teranic army and the ghosts.

ATTACK SOLDIERS AND GHOSTS!

General Spook

Time to mount an airboure attack, methinks.

What about the other giant Zombie!

*there are loads of giant zombies appearing all over the battlefield.*

terran, get in one of the terranic army tanks and start using the rockets on the giant zombie. the ghosts are distracting them, but they won't be around forever. this is our chance.

* Tewdric and Odo soar over the field and garlic spray the other large zombie. It melts into a gungy heap and smokes gently on the ground *

I think that's the last we'll see of him

OK spook, but I need you to start attacking the Iceraven!

*Climbs in the tank and aims for one of the larger zombies*

Take that zombie scum! (I've always wanted to say that )

*One of Ice's personal tanks (still a good distance away) fires a round that impacts near Spooks tank (Gotta luv stabalised computer targetting) as they continue to race forward at around 40 Mp/h*

*A few of the other mega-zombies begins spraying automatic weapon fire at the terran lines. One of them has somehow caught fire and is now running on an impact path to the terren tank unit*

Is anyone listening?

* Launches a bombardment of grenades at advancing enemy lines *

Yes odo, but you only got one of the giant zombies.

I'm working on it

* spectacular shower of grenades halts enemy advance, Odo lands back in trench to celebrate with a *

*starts foaming at the mouth.*
Don't worry it happens all the time

* for some bizare reason the zombie he bit turns in to a rabid monkey*

*Ice and his entourage stop about 300 meters from the Terrens. Fireing from cover behind his tanks Ice begins to lob grenades from his 203 at the enemy. The APC's disgourge thier occupants to set up hasty defenses while the APC's themselves lay down suppresive fire with .50 Cals and Mk-19 Auto-Grenade Launchers. Ice gets in the prone and takes carfull aim at any exposed Terranic enemy*

Is this rabid monkey zombie going to be on our side then? Could be a way of building our strength!

* lobs a handful of grenades over trench top *

*Quickly computes his forces strength*

15,000 Initial zombies in the first wave
most died
1 mega-zombie for ever 25 lesser zombies = 600 say 200 were tottaly obliterated that leaves 400 mega-zombies... 3-5 mega-zombies destroyed so far leaves 395 + an additional 7,500 lesser zombies coming up from behind = 7,895 of my forces against *takes a quick count* 6-10 enemies and the souls of all those I've killed...
...
...
...
I may be in trouble.

*Into his com* Yes I think you should gather reinforcments slaughter the next town and this time bind thier souls.

*Fires a round at one of the Terrans*

Can't bite too many Zombies. Leaves a foul sweaty socks taste in my mouth

*Leads Rabid Monkey Zombie to Terranic base, has some tea, and discusses the pros and cons of being a zombie*

* ducks as bullets whistle through the air *

Rabid monkey: Sweaty socks isn't good!

* picks bullet out of small dent in armour *

THAT DOES IT!!!! This is my best battle dress and no one put dents in it and survives for long!!!

<oco We're back on the front page again !

and we are gonna stay there. *spook shoots iceraven's hat off, unless he wasn't wearing a hat, in which case spook didn't shoot his hat off.* ok zombies, u ain'tseen nothing yet.*spook recalls the s of the dead mega zombies.* mega zombie ghosts, inhabit the mega zombies and make them commit suicide. *mega zombie ghosts start chasing the mega zombies all over the battlefield.*

but very confused

So are we fighting ghosts now???

* lobs a few more grenades over just to see if anything happens *