h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Yar's brain] D'oh!

[His face doesn't even twitch, however. He nods, and gives Milos a thumbs-up.]

Glad to hear it. Guess fitting in here won't be a problem anymore either, huh?

[to the STUMPED medics in general] So, any particular reason for helping this guy out? I mean, not that *I'd* need a reason, but it seems a bit ... out-of-character for an organization consisting, if its name is anything to go by, of sinister thinkers unleashing multifarious pernicious evil deeds.

*Corrupt slouches against the wall, playing with a marble-sized ball of fire.*

For that matter, it's kind of out-of-character for you to be hanging around the Stadium here... isn't it?

*She winks at Yar, grinning amicably.*

OFF WITH HIS HEAD!

*The Krylma (note: not STUMPED, Krylma. ) Medic looks at Yar, smiling compationately*

Medic-Well, he's a civillian. Just because the Krylma legions will take over the world doesn't mean that we're heartless. And besides, our genetic sciences were a few decades ahead of modern Earth's back when Atlantis sank. Repairing this alien damage was only slightly more troublesome than putting on a bandage for you people. And besides, since he carried the nanites that our glorious leader transferred his brain into, it would be ill-advised for us to remove someone that our leader may wish to thank.

Mad props for my revolutionary spelling of compassionate.

THAT explains a few things.

[Yar bursts out laughing at that last bit]

Oh man, I was *so* close. Okay, I'm done here, bye!

[He gets up to leave, then glances to Corrupt]

Oh, and for the record, I was just here as a sort of unofficial bodyguard to Milos, as payment for letting him hitch a lift back to Earth with me. Also because I thought it would be funny.

*A few dozen Black Vested Henchmen run towards Yar to engage in the obligatory, and probably very short, fight scene*

[The STUMPED rock group, Hench Band, begin playing a raucious melody that sounds like it would be equally appropriate either for a fight scene, or for a party hosted by a college student.]

[Yar] Here we go!

[Yar grins and detaches his sheathed sword from his belt. He karate-chops at the face of the first henchman to get within karate-chopping distance, intending to knock him into the second henchman. He then leaps forward into the air, landing in a crouch in the middle of the group, and spins around, his still-sheathed sword held outward, intending to trip up as many of the henchmen as possible.]

*Many henchmen trip. The ninjas at the sidelines, having seen Yar in action, now similarly rush, along with the three or so still awake Black Vested Henchmen (I mean, Yar tripped them over. That makes them unconcious, right? Or has every single kung fu movie with alarmingly talented child ninjas mislead me about this?)

We're going by action movie logic here. Why not!

Speaking of which, by that same logic, the fighting capability of a group of ninjas is inversely proportional to their number. A *group* of ninjas should be no problem.


[Yar smirks, and springs forward from his crouched position, more interested at the moment in escaping than actual combat, using his PK to boost his momentum so that he lands several meters away. He then uses his Air Trick twice, zipping forward in a brief blur another six meters closer to the exit ...]

*The exit closes*

Krylmabot-This is kinda fun to watch. Never seen any of these before.

[Yar considers this as he reaches the exit, and draws his magical katana, experimentally slashing at the door.]

*Corrupt grabs the nearest popcorn vendor, threatening him with the marble of fire. Having witnessed some of her previous antics, the vendor flees in terror, leaving Corrupt alone with a merrily popping popcorn machine. She scoops some out and munches happily.*

*She notices Yar heading for the exit and frowns.*

Awww, why is he leaving now? Come back here... this is fun to watch.

*She sets the perimeter of the stadium on fire, just for fun.*

There. Nobody should be going anywhere now.

*The door is damaged, not to the point where it's really openable, but very damaged. In fact, it's so damaged that opening it may be an impossibility. Ah, well, no one was going anywhere with Corrupt's fire either way*

Krylmabot-Mental note: have Krylma and STUMPED mystics investigate wards against magical swords on security doors.

[Yar considers this, and starts slashing indiscriminately against the door, attempting to destroy it outright.]

*Yar can probably, I assume, soon hear the sound of the massive weaponry powering up on the other side of the door. The sound is either a very, very powerful BFG, or a very low-level superweapon*

[Yar's slashing slows down, and he hesitates, pushing a small triangle out of the highly-damaged security door -- just wide enough to, say, shoot his Portal Gun through it -- and peers out through the hole. Oh, and by the way, he should also be able to tell exactly how much danger he's in, because of his danger sense.]

Forgot to ask -- what are the floors, walls, and ceiling of this area made of?

Indestructo-crete.

That's concrete with carbon fiber strings and titanium and steel rebar.