h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Shagbark picks himself up from the debris and decides to go into hiding before someone mistakes him for a piece of the mast.

*a band of shipwrights come marching in and start to repair whilst singing a happy tune*

Hi-ho, hi-ho

shagbark peeks out wondering why shipwrights in italy wouldn't be singing funiculi,funiculii

**Shagbark strolls by on his way to town singing
Some thing the world is made for fun and frolic
And so Do I And so do I
Some think the world is made all melancholic
To pine and sigh
To pine and sigh
But I-- I like to spend my time in singing
Some joyeous song, Some Joyeous song
To fill the air so Joyeously ringing
is far from wrong, is far from wrong.
He can still be heard as he exits the ship
Listen,Listen, Music Fills the air!
Listen, Listen, Joy is everywhere,
Funiculi, Funiculii, Funiculi, Funiculiiii
Joy is every where funiculi, Funiculii!

Singing Carpenters? Now where have I heard of them before?

*wakes up with *

Now I understand why is called "having carpenters" in Denmark

*hears a song which is not a German volksong and decides to take a look, she walks closer and sips her tequila*

Maybe what we should have here are Christmas Carols but I guess I will wait until after Pearl Harbor Day to think about that.

Oh come ye, sweet carpenters
and raise us a mast
complete with a crow's nest
- and make it d*arn fast

O Thank you sweet carpenters
for italian pine, O thank you o thank you from Shagbark and all

sing choirs of pirates
sing ye from the rigging.
It's such a jolly ship here
It's such a jolly ship here
It's such a joly ship here
with Pierce the Pirate

shagbark sets out some portable christmas lights along the railing
hooked to a portable hydrodynamic generator.

shagbark brings out table which he bolts to deck. Decks it in
Christmas finery and installs crockpot for wassail. Wonders if brewhouse will be able to handle recipe he gave them.

Until then, let's empty these bottles of Tuborgs X-mas-brew

Will you be serving eggnog as well?

eggnog what a great idea. Let see where would I put the eggnog

In a glass?

So I think I will need about a dozen unbreakable egg nog glasses and
a dozen high tech self heating thermal mugs for the wassail.
I'll bring those up from my secret location in a few days.
I plan to make this thing self service so don't expect me to be here
very much. Also a portable fridge to keep the egg nog cold.
all quite doable