h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

News has just leaked from the Party At My Place Party that the presidential candidate fords has been subject to an attempt to prevent her from completing her campaign to become the first Female HooToo President.

According to the runours, while on vacation in Portugal, fords was poisoned and she was seen by the country's premier toxicologists and venomologists to determine if in deed this was a vicious attempt by opposing parties to eliminate fords from the running.

Initial reports only rule out "None Of The Above" as the instigator as the Apathy Party surely couldn't be bothered to think of such a dastardly deed.

More news to follow.

Traveller in Time having a party
"And I bet the 'I have not got time for this' party also has a solid excuse "

There are still a few party members who were unaccounted for in the "I haven't got time for this Party" but they are not high up on the list of suspects.

Can you be sure it's poison, or just exposure of a wee Scotish lady to direct sunlight?

The connection between over exposure to the sun and the symptoms of posoning has been noted, but has been ruled out. Reports indicate that Presidential nominee fords and her chief of staff hasn't been spending all that much time in the sun.

It was rubbish spending the night in a top private clinic in Albufeira. They had Sky Digital but no viewing card

We in the Ozark Party would never attempt to poinson anyone, not least because we have no idea what 'poinson' is. It sounds like a combination of poison, point and poisson, the French for .

Could it be that fords has poisoned herself by drinking like a until she's completely missed the point?

The 'this is not a mad takeover scheme' party would like to give you this ominous message: We warned you.

Did you?

No.

*Puts on his 'press' hat*

Anyone care to give me a quote on this?

Sure, how much are you willing to pay for it?

Yeah, I'll give you a quote.
As the newly appointed Minister of Mis-Information of the "Party Round My Place Party" I have this to say.

"The Party Round My Place Party vehemently denies any rumours that the attempted poisoning of our presidential candidate was merely a case of sun-stroke, and that, in fact, several suspicious individuals were spotted around the kitchen areas of the hotel where fords and EV are staying.
Toxicology results are expected back shortly to see what type of substance was put into the food of our presidential candidate, and the search continues for the culprits, who are believed to have fled the country."

Bet it was the clive/RF Hedgehogamonica that did it

Sounds like a very hegemoniacal thing to do.

My party is, of course, anti-hegemony, so it couldn't possibly be anything to do with us.

** Wishes presidential hopeful fords a speedy recovery **

** Looks rounds suspiciously at the hegemony-type parties **

RF

Right! I demand to know which of the parties is in collaboration with French air traffic control, resulting in a delay of four and a half hours to our flight home - a delay which, I might add, is longer than the flight itself!!

2legs, clearly.

Well, it had certainly occurred to me that he might be to blame.

Has he still not yet got round to acquiring the services of a professional scapegoat?!? All he needs to do is send me a very large wad of cash, then everything's my fault