h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

ouch! smack!

ooooookay, sorry lauri dear. i didn't mean anything. i won't touch whitley if you don't want me to.

*continues to trudge along quietly*

Derival what do you think my pretties are up to? Shall we look through the crystal?

Please master, please *bounces up and down manically* please plllleeeeeeeeaaaaasseeeee

STOP THAT!!! *smacks Derival*

*whimpers and squatts by LINE's side*

Ok then

love you really sea!

*grins manically at anyone who looks at her then goes back to muttering to whitley*

Spring, up till now, had been allowing himself to be taken, his mind overriden. Still, it still functioned. And the strange feeling was beginning to be familiar. A pattern..

Then-

"Unauthorized control!" snarled Spring, in a voice not his own. It came out harsh, bitter, a recorded response. "Illegal behavior modification! Defensive measures activated!"

His hands flew for the red button.

And all hell blew loose.

"Grrraaaauurrgh!" A guttural animal voice bubbled from the depth's of Spring's tattered lungs. His flesh was quivering. Contorting. hardening. As innumerable cc's of synthetic adrenaline, endorphine, various stimulants, psychotics, antipsychotics, and Sweet Jinga Joy Juice rushed through his bloodstream.

As his nervois system was flooded with the eqivalent of a controlled epileptic fit. A nuclear fire with a purpose. Spring's one blue eye dilated to pinsize and temporarily went dim, as his brain waves sparked, fizzled, turned upside-down and-

"Heehee,"

Then he attacked.

Um, recrash? I'm sorry, but I've totally lost track of your contributions here. These past two posts, were they describing something that was happening elsewhere in this world, in our home world, in a world we've not yet come to....it's a neat story, I just can't fit it into the continuity for some reason.

*As spring begins to fight off the controll Ice reacts*

S*@!

*in the blur of an eye Ice hurl's spring to the ground and appears next in front of Sea and Lauri shadow-blade drawn in a defensive postion*

This is not going to be good... any ideas?

*mutters to whitley a bit then stands close to ice's shoulder and holds out her hand to spring*

whitley likes you spring, don't you my baby yes you do, you like him. You won't hurt him will you Ice.

*The Wizard, ears wide open, leads Vomar and GL to a set of huge ornate double doors. He turns to speak to them.*

Wait here just a moment, please.

*He turns, opens one door just enough to let himself through, then disappears inside, closing the door behind him. In the short interval when the door was partially open, GL could hear the sounds of a heated argument going on inside. One speaker seemed to be trying to convince the others of something, but was being generally shouted down.*

Okay, Vomar, we'll probably have to do something more to erase any doubt. I still have an arrow from that mill where they had their portal. If we use the amulets to make me disappear, then I can reappear, produce the arrow and say I went to that world using our own power. Should impress the pants off of them.

That would work. If you don't reappear before they come back, I'll just stay in fortune-cookie mode.

*sea, who is COMPLETELY lost, is just bookmarking. being that she's painfully tired, she's not going to try and make sense of the backlog. she'll try again tomorrow*

I wasn't planning on hurting anyone soon luv and I'd rather not have to defend myself against the child so if you have a way of calming his chemicly induced rage I suggest you do it quickly. Otherwise...

*Ice's eyes reflect the cold darkness of his soul and show the pure and total apathy for life that he has accumulated over the centuries of his existence*

*One of the huge doors opens and the Wizard becons GL and Vomar inside. The interior looks something like a Roman Amphitheatre, except that the seats are luxuriously padded. All faces crane to look as the Wizard leads GL and Vomar down the steps to the stage area, where there is a long table, behind which are seated about a dozen men and women with long white beards and/or long white hair. Most are dressed in flowing cloaks with pointed hats, with moons and stars a common motif. Several have wands with silver stars on the end.

In the stands are numerous similar looking men and women, although many do not have white hair/beards and many have more modest attire. None have wands.

As GL and Vomar approach, the Wizard at the centre of the table gets up from his throne, for that is what he was sitting in, and points to a spot in front of the table. The Wizard that was leading them veers off and takes a seat at the far end of the head table. GL and Vomar saunter over to the spot indicated by the chief Wizard. GL looks around the room.*

Nice place you've got here, although a little low-tech. But then it's probably the best you could do, so I won't say anything more about its deficiencies.

We've come along here because we were curious about how advanced your science was, but now that we have seen your level of, uh, achievement, perhaps we will be going. It's a shame you didn't have anything exciting to show us, like some grandiose plans for interdimensional conquest or something. Now THAT'S something we could have helped out with.

Yes, that's our specialty, as a matter of fact. To those who can truly fathom the depths of the Multiverse, we offer ways to make interdimensional invasion and conquest faster and easier, in a way that is mutually beneficial to all parties.

*Evil grin*

Except for the invadees, of course. At any rate, we might check in again in a few thousand years when it looks like you're better organized for it.

*The eyes of several of the mages have slowly been growing wider over the past minute or so of speech. One stands*

Standing Wizard-I move that we show our plans to these....um, two. Perhaps we are not as....centralized as they would like....

*Affy arches an eyebrow at this*

*keeps her hand reached out to spring and talks to him like he's a little child*

c'mon hush now, go back to sleep, you need to sleep, be good now.

*continues to look at whitley curiously, but from a distance so not to anger lauri*

*mutters* fascinating...

*lowers his blade a bit but keeps his eyes focused on Spring ready to react. He speaks to Pack and Recrash*

He's your little pet project. Any idea's?

*The head Wizard hushes the Wizard who spoke. GL shows some mild interest*

Ah, you do have such plans? That would mean you have the technology for interdimesional travel. But judging from your line-of-sight transporters, you probably only have fixed portals rather than personal interdimensional transference sytems (PITS, for short). Must be painstakingly slow.

*The head Wizard looks hard at Vomar and GL.*

Head Wizard: I think you're bluffing. I don't believe there is any such thing as this PITS of yours.

*GL raises his eyebrows.*

No? Well, perhaps a demonstration would help.

*GL turns to Vomar and holds his amulet out. Vomar does the same and the amulets begin to glow when they touch. GL mutters the invisibility spell and winks out of sight.*

*Vomar grins wickedly*

Bluffing is for those who play games. And we never play games when there's a potential profit.

Excitable voices over the comm: He's not OUR project!

Heehee.

Scuff reaches out to calm Spring when

PAF! Her shoulder explodes in red mist!

PAF!PAFPAFPAF! The ground erupts as searching bursts of twenty mickey-mickey depleted uranium rounds pepper the area. Sniper! Laser pointer wavers a little, then runs a burst across Ice's chest and it explodes.

HeeeEEEeEEEEE! (Attacks)